According to research, the number one cause of the breakup of romantic relationships is failure to communicate. If your relationship was otherwise happy, this problem can often be fixed by setting clear expectations and openly discussing frustrations before things explode in a big fight. Other issues can be harder to overcome, like infidelity or jealousy; but with work and counseling, even these types of issues are possible to work through.
2) A GF may be the last thing you need. Right now, with where you’re at, you need to reflect a bit and work on YOU. You’re probably still a great guy, you just need time to regroup, gain your strength, clarity and stability back – and frankly by the time you do this, you may not even want the same girl anymore. Once you do, you’ll be able to provide a girl with REAL value, and that’s like a drug to a high-quality woman!
My relationship was an open one. We had an argument and i wanted to broke up but went back after 2 days. I later took some space without telling him, its been on for about 4 months. So we didn’t break up but I’m worried he thinks so. He called first one month after the space but i didn’t pick or chat with him. Then 2 weeks later he called again and i picked, we talk for a while about nothing important but didn’t call again. Then sent Christmas and new year message which i replied but nothing else. Then 2 weeks after that i sent him birthday message and called once but he never picked or called back. But 5 days ago he called and sounded so quiet,l. The conversation was really short, i was nice and i didn’t ask to meet him either but right now I’m really worried if things will never improve. We normally use to chat on WhatsApp and i haven’t received a message from him. I don’t know if i should still keep holding on or to move on.
I have been dating this guy he lives abit far from me I went to see him he lies to me he were have gf already but never had sex with her when we first met we was so attractive to each other then up having sex was like we were falling we almost sleep together for 11 time but he borak up with his gf but now his pull away from me too as he knows that I really liked him I’m so confuse don’t no what to do he said he has to go his different ways I’m So lost cos I fall in love him and I don’t no about him it’s seem like he hasn’t get over his ex

WOW I don’t “KNOW” you…But I really like you! ?You are HILARIOUS and REAL and it’s clear that you’ve truly been “there” before by the things that you say. It’s like your taking these feelings and thoughts straight from MY mind and typing them out. I LOVE what you stand for (and what you don’t stand for). Well my question is in the last paragraph from what’s above, when you say something like : after getting your ex back he will eventually SHOW you (if we took your advice about showing we’re not putting up with the bs) that the break-up was a good thing.- Are you saying you feel they’ll still be the same way they were BEFORE the breakup (a f*cktard?) or they will possibly have changed for the better due to us setting those “what’s not acceptable” boundaries? And do you always feel that they would ONLY want you back due to a wanting to be in control thing not ever because they actually love you? Just wondering


Alright, lets say that I was trying to get an ex girlfriend back and I had made it this far into the step by step process I am outlining here. I took out a sheet of paper and wrote down what I thought our best couple experiences were together. For the sake of this page lets say that me and my ex had an experience where we were watching a football game outdoors and it was really cold. She was getting very cold so I offered her my jacket.
Get some new clothes. New times call for new duds. It's a subtle change in you, but the importance will be clear to her: your new outer shell will signal deeper changes underneath. Get that new shirt that you've been wanting to buy, or those new pair of jeans. Looking sharp is an important aspect of physical attraction, and if she sees you looking great in unfamiliar clothes, she'll sense that there's been forward movement, if not wholesale change.
Look, if you're serious about this guy and you really want him back in your life, then you must change. Changing may not be easy, but it's necessary if you want your relationship to be better than the last time. It's quite simple. If you keep doing what you've been doing – you'll keep getting the same results. So don't expect a happily ever after, supercool happy ending if you aren't willing to do things differently than you did before, otherwise you'll just end up breaking up again.

a lack of respect on either side. If you or your ex call each other names, belittle each other's accomplishments, or say disparaging things about one another to your family or friends, then there is no respect in that relationship. These are all features of an emotionally abusive relationship.[20] Find someone who shows you the respect you deserve, and commit to treating him or her with respect as well.
I have known very rocky relationships that have sorted themselves out over time and then lasted, as far as I could tell, forever. Sometimes, these new beginnings started in the judge’s chambers when the divorce was being finalized. Sometimes afterwards. I have recently come across someone who married the same woman three times—although it is hard to believe that they have, at last, come to terms with each other. In these instances, it is often the case that the couple had not ever really made clear to each other just how strongly they felt about certain things. (They would say at this point that they told the other person a hundred times just what they felt; but I have been witness to some of these conversations, and sometimes I am left not quite understanding how strong their feelings were.)
I was really broken up since this is my first relationship(I’m not the most popular girl) and I just kept on texting him and trying to see him to patch things up, one time we were talking just about other things and it seemed to be ok, but just today I tried to see him after we got into another argument to try to hopefully patch things up but he just got pissed and called me a staker(we live in the same town and his house is only a few min away)

My husband and I got married 4 years ago. We don’t have kids, so we’re enjoying the company of each other. All of the sudden, he changed. He kept on telling lies and he even told his brother that he has another woman. Proud one huh??! He broke up with the me that easy last January, I never granted his wish of breaking up coz hello! we’re not just lovers, we’re married couple! He even yelled at me when I visited him in his office once. I got really depressed and cried my heart out. Now, I just read about your articles and i wanted to try this.. I hope it’s going to work… :-) I’ll keep updates..
This is a great article. Thank you. It made me feel a lot better. I broke up with my boyfriend 3 months ago and I started seeing someone else right away. Maybe that was a bad idea, because he really was just a “bandaid” and it ended up being an explosive disaster pretty quickly. After that I’ve been feeling incredibly depressed and desperately missing my ex. He was not just my ex but he was also my best friend. However, after reading the “checklist” here, it has helped remind me of the reasons why it didn’t work out between us. We actually broke up dozens of times over the 2 years of our relationship. It was for a reason. He told me we are not right for each other romantically, and I know he is probably right, as much as it hurts me to admit it. I could never picture myself marrying him or having a family with him. But I miss him so much and I want to be friends, but he says we can’t because we’ll just end up getting back together. I know that’s probably true too because we’re attracted to each other naturally. I just can’t understand why we can’t be in each other’s lives at all. I can’t deal with that.

I really like the links from the first comment. I think as long as the two people love each other it doesn't matter what they did. unless its cheating. Trust is hard for me to understand. MY bf doesn't trust me and even though he has done things to break my trust in different ways I feel like I know him and can understand he's just a human and we make some mistakes sometimes. I try and change how he wants me to, to be a better person and show him I do care but somehow its not ever enough. I do not know how I can show him I care. He wants a big grand gesture but I do not have money or an idea of what to do. He said something like seeing him at work would make him feel like I care but when I didn't do u it his time limit that I didn't even know about he got mad. I just want to show him he is special but every little thing doesn't mean anything to him anymore. I can say I felt like how he describes because he hurt me and I didn't care about anything but distressing helped me see more clearly and what I needed to. I think that's what's going on with him because he hasn't been able to distress.

Let him see it, but don't say it. Tell him you had a great time, and that you could meet up some time to hang out… he will feel like his leg was chopped of for not kissing, but he will know that you want more, that there might be a new, bright future for the two of you. All night he'll be flipping around in bed, thinking about how beautiful you are and how much he wants to get back with you. I'm not saying you should be ice-cold when you meet up, on the contrary, be cold, but a bit mysterious, make him wonder.


Okay so me & my ex boyfriend broke up like a couple months ago. Me and him have been dating for over a year. Ever since we got into high school he changed. He’s like every other guy now. During our relationship, he would cry when I left or if I took the bracelet he gave me off. I just really want him back, I still do love him. I honestly need to know what to do. Help me please
let me ask something.this is the second time that me and my ex boyfriend breaks up or he broke up with me.but this is the worst one.i felt he moved on already because he defriended me included my friends who were his friends on facebook. i knew,he loves me so much but we couldn’t just get a right time to think better and then we ended up arguements.i loved him too.i learnd i have mistakes.tell me please,is there any possibilities to get back together and reconciled?how i read your tips..but in our situations like these.im sure he’s very mad at me and giving up on me.he never replies my emails and text.i wanna try to reconciled with him but how? i know i cannot make a move ist .i want him to see im changed .i want him realized he made a huge mistakes.please email me for some advices.thank you
Personally, I wouldn’t consider it an emergency if he’s without some of his stuff. However, if for whatever the reason he was so worried something happened to you, at some point he would ACTUALLY start looking for you, whether it’s at work or at home, in which you would find it sweet of course, but at the same time you can tell him you’re fine and just need some space.

I’ve met my sole partner 3 months ago, fell in love with him and started gettin jelous over his ex, tried to control him etc. After just 2 months he paid for me to go on holiday with him and we had the best toime together. We have been home now 4 weeks hardly seen each other, he’s gone distance and I’m texting him all the time now asking why. Anyway I haven’t seen him for w week and iom going to his tonight, am so nervous he may have just invited me to end us, but I’m giving tonight muy best shot, I’m going to be the woman he didn’t want to be away from the women he sed he loved and the woman I was on holiday. Please if you read this wish me luck he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I want him in my life please God watch over me tonight when we are together, please God make him see no women will ever love him like I do , please God can I keep him make hm keep me.
There’s this guy I used to date and I honestly don’t remember who broke up with who but my friend asked him why he doesn’t like me and he said I hurt him real bad but I don’t remember ever hurting him all I remember is him dating my other friend and I really want him back but it would be so awkward to walk up to him. We never talk but I really want him back!

Lord, I have come to you today to surrender to you all the load I carry in my heart. I have come to you to Thank You for blessing me with someone like him. Lord, you know how much love I have for him, and you know the pain I am going through right now. I pray to you to please heal our hearts with all the frustrations, the pain, the anger, the sorrow and all the damages. I pray to you to please Lord help us save the relationship we have. Lord i have come to you to ask you to please keep us stronger just like we were before, that the love we have for each other will always be unconditional as the love you have for the both of us, I have come to you to ask of you to please keep us together that we may face whatever wrath is going to be thrown at us and that we may overcome the struggles we are facing now and the years to come. Lord I know you know how much I want him to become a part of my life, to have him and share with him the remaining years of my life, I ask of you to please continue to bless our love with the help of your grace that we may keep the affection and the care that we have for each other until our last breath. Lord, I ask of you to please guide us through this bump we are facing, and for the years to come. Amen
In an effort to resuscitate an already dysfunctional relationship, women will frequently make the fatal error of bluffing. Your girlfriend will repeatedly threaten to break up with you in order to scare you into changing (for the record I wholeheartedly disagree with this method, but that discussion is for another article), hoping you will prove your love by doing anything to make her happy. It never works, and you rarely take her threats seriously. So you break up.
I get it and I’ve been there. You miss him, you miss all of his quirks and jokes and the way that he made you feel. You miss the way that YOU felt and the girl that you were when you were with him when the relationship was good. You make an excuse for and justify everything that he did that was wrong, disrespectful and hurtful because you feel like it was you that provoked it and made him act out. You just want him back, no matter what. how to get your ex boyfriend back
After my girlfriend and I got separated I constantly looked for articles and books that could help me get her back. When I found your website, I was pleased with the number of positive reviews, but couldn’t really believe your course was so effective. I thought that my case was so difficult that no one could help me. When I read that I would get my money back if the course didn’t help me, I realized that I wouldn’t be losing anything if I tried, so I bought the book and read it. When I got to the middle, I was sure it was going to work! Until then, I was doing everything wrong, which is why there was no result!
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