Your ideas seem great, but i feel like my situation may be a little different seeing as how my ex bf is different. Long story short, we had been dating for 9 months and I even lived with him for a bit when i was in between leases. We started getting into a lot of fights that came from his insecurities. He can be a bit short tempered at times as well, and one stupid fight that I caused turned into this big one. I definitely said some things that struck a nerve with him (i was pmsing at the time). So we decided to take a short break. I tried ending the break but he didnt seem ready in which i irrationally broke up with him thinking he didnt want to be with me. It was juvenile of me, I have so many regrets from it. He got mad blah blah blah, so we decided to just go back to taking a break.
The first thing that you need to do is simple, stop talking to them. You need to drop communication completely. You absolutely need to stop this overall. Many people feel the need to text them back, call them back, or just try to be in their sight. Don’t do that. You have to cut everything out. Walk away, stop talking, stop texting, and walk away from social media. When you talk to them after the break up, you’re going to end up causing them to think that you’re not quite as good as she once thought. You don’t want her to justify the reason why she walked away.
Think about why you want him back. Breakups are never easy, even when the relationship was not a good fit. For this reason, it's crucial to think about your motives for wanting to get your boyfriend back. If you want to get back together because you are sad or lonely or don't like being single, you should probably reconsider. Just because you miss your ex does not mean you should be with him. These feelings will go away eventually, although it may take some time. If you want to get back together because you genuinely care for your ex and you can see yourself having a future with him, then go ahead and try to get him back!
More often than not if you have gotten this far in your conquest to get them back they are going to respond back positively. Except this time you are going to engage them in a conversation but make sure that you don’t go too fast. Remember, you still have to be the one to end the conversation first. Lets look at how a conversation like this might play out using an example from above:
Maybe you will watch your favorite movie at home or go out. You will have fun together and do many things you’ve always enjoyed . Try to envision every detail and understand that this is not just a dream. It is completely possible to get your girlfriend back! Now you know that there are techniques and secrets that can help you restore your relationship!
My fears came true last night when my boyfriend of 8 months broke up with me. I am 23, he is 26. We have both been in very serious previous relationships and when we finally met, it was a soul connection other than purely physical or anything of that sort. I was with my high school sweetheart for 6 years… He had been separated from his wife for two years and a half years(they were married at 21), and has just recently signed the final divorce papers.
Recover emotionally. You don't stand a chance of getting your ex back if you're not emotionally calm and controlled. Women dislike needy, clingy, desperate men - so you need to pull your own life together before attempting to draw her back into it. Like it or not, showing her that you can deal with life on your own will attract her back to you. That's because girls like men who are self-sufficient and independent. So go out to the gym, visit the movies with friends, or start an adventure. If you're having a great time, she'll want to be there with you.
Thanks for this post, Jason. After I read it I had a little hope that me and my ex-boyfriend COULD get back together. But then I scrolled down to the comments and I read everyone else’s comments, apprehensions, fears, emotional and psychological hardships that they’re going through and I wondered — if this is how a person is making us feel, is it worth it?
“I recently got back in touch with my ex and we’re trying to make it work again. What I felt really helped me through the process was the no contact rule for at least three months and truly working on yourself and learning to find happiness outside of the relationship. I got involved with different hobbies, such as sports/working out to make myself feel good, as well as go back to salsa dancing which was something I love to do.”
Hey guys i really need help. Me and our gf have gone through a breakup its not the first time this would be the third time. But i do not know if this one is serious. She said shes too young for a relationship she just wants to be single an live life. She does not want a bf. weve been together for 2 and a half years. I took her birginity and she took mine. But i dont want to lose her im desperate to have her back. I waited a couple of weeks then started speaking to her again. We caught up a couple of times just as friends. But even then she doesnt txt me unless i txt her. And when she replies its only short words. She actually got angry coz i went out with a few mates drinking and she asked if i hooked up with another girl. So that msg to me feels like she still cares for me but doesnt want a relationship. I snapped last night and txtd her and askes if she ever misses us. She said i dont think it can work anymore i just want to live life on my own. People are saying find someone new she was your first love. But the thing is i dont want to. We shared so many good times together. It was always me and her. She was me to a tea i couldnt see myself with anyone else but her. Shes the girl i want to spend the rest of my life with. I need this girl back so bad its not funny.
St.jude I come to you with a broken heart asking for forgiveness and that u please pray for my relationship. Please heal us and make Please let him love me again like he once did please help him trust me and want to make things work. We have so much time invested in each other and my love for this man is beyond measures for me to just give up on him. I will fight till the end I will fight for what I love please st.jude help me be strong help me remove any negative thoughts that go through my head and please help both him and I stay positive and I know it will take a lot of time patience honesty convincing and time and trust to get back to where we once were. But I know with prayer to our Heavenly Father and you st.jude anything is possible. Hear my prayers in the name of our amazing powerful Heavenly Father.
hi, last sunday my boyfriend broke up with me. i dont know if its totally broke up because he only said to me that “lets end this, i have so many problems right now and im so tired.” i asked him if he dont like me anymore. he said “yes, i dont. i just want to be alone now, pls.”. i cant accept the fact that we broke up and he never even explain to me the reason. all his saying is he had so many problems but he dont want to discuss with me thats why i cant understand him why he so stress about. so i gave what he want, i didnt talk to him ever since, its almost 2 days already. but i miss him. and i know he love me too. maybe something really happened that why i gave him what he want. if he really want to be alone. he also never msg me since then. do i just let him alone first. you think he will call me soon? i really want him back. im trying my best not to msg or call him. hopefully soon he will realize that he miss me too. i know its because of stress and anger thats why all of a sudden he said those things to me.
Then you cry, and maybe even look up to the sky, maybe even pray and think, ‘Please… Just let me get back with my ex. I hope my ex is just making a mistake and he/she wasn’t thinking it through. I know we are perfect for each other. I want to just call my ex up and say “I love you”.’ Then you look at your phone every half an hour, check your messenger, facebook, instagram, twitter, and heck… email inbox, to see if your ex would want to talk to you, all ready to get back together.
I went out with my ex girlfriend for 9years an have 3 wonderful kids with her we had our ups an downs the last 2 years were mostly downs an a lot of fighting we really weren’t talking so she broke up with me for about 7-8 months I did the whole crying asking her for that one chance trying to keep my family together she is really my first love I know what I did wrong an I’m trying to change an understand what I’ve done wrong well we both move out of the place we lived together she went back with her mother an I got my own place I still love her but I just found out she started dating just dating an I’ve seen a couple of women but I still have strong feelings for her she won’t talk to me an when she does she gets angry quick she gets jealous when I say I’m with a friend an she turns around an try’s to make me jealous in return why would she do that I just wanna know if I still have a chance what can I do an if I don’t should I just move on please help
The best way to optimize your chances of getting your ex bf back is to become Ungettable Girl. You want to increase your value in his eyes and also make it difficult for him to reach you, talk to you, and see you. This is just a small part of becoming the Ungettable Girl. It’s also about making yourself beautiful in his eyes from afar. He can see you, but now it is at a distance (through Snap chat, Facebook, etc). Slowly over time, your ex boyfriend will crave you and you will do things to ensure that he feels that craving every day by using little jealousy ploys and rumors and chance encounters. Your ex boyfriend loves nothing more than a good chase – so give him one.
My ex bf and I live together. He said he will never change his mind. He says he is moving out. I have no proof. He hasn’t told his family we are broken up, for over a month now. He got on tinder immediately and is now off tinder. He is posting videos from a vacation of our from almost a year ago. I am living my life and going out trying to be social. How can I get him back?
Thank you for this article. My bf and I got back together after a year apart. I broke up with him because I did not feel he was going to take it to the next step. Engagement. He tried to reach out to me during that time. But I never picked up. He called ,e out of the blue and for some reason I picked up. He said he was still in love with me and he had moved and wanted me to come and visit. Came to me as a surprise because I am pretty sure he has been dating. I never stopped loving him and it made it hard for me to even start a new relationship. So about a month ago I called him and told him I would visit. It was great. We laughed, joked talked about what we did wrong before and how we would change it. He told me we should take things slowly one day at a time. I agreed. But my emotions are running so fast and I think I was “over expressing” myself. Anyway he said it seems like I am getting ahead of myself again and he really wants to take things slowly. It made me feel bad until I read your article. I will follow the steps. We have gotten past a few of them. I really don’t want to mess things up. We both love each other like crazy and we have such good chemistry. He tells me everything like he has always done and I do the same. I think I will build on that. I also talked about the past yesterday and he did not like that because we’d already discussed it and he said he had put it behind him and did not want to be reminded of it. Thank you for this.
I decided I had to take matters into my own hands and since I spend a lot of my workday online, that’s where I looked for answers. I discovered a wealth of information on the internet and in the course of my online travels I came upon some great products that were heads above the rest in terms of quality and professionalism. These products (for example the excellent Save My Marriage Today system by Amy Waterman, and the first marriage book I ever read, the invaluable Save the Marriage by Lee Baucom really changed my perception of the problems my wife and I had, and it was like turning on a light bulb.
Your story is very similar to mine. He was dating another girl but i didnt know it. He came back to me several times but didnt want to work things out so i blocked him from social media. that was three months ago. He has been dating that girl for several months even when when he was trying to convince me that he still loved me and missed me but because of my shortcomings he couldnt be with me. Now they are a couple and he hasnt tried to reach out. i changed my number though.
Ever since the 22nd July until 25th July, I’ve been sending him messages on wanting to salvage this relationship, wanting to change and be more open minded and gradually change to really trust him, his replies are all negatively saying “no, I’ve tried but I can’t.” “It’s better we stay friends” “I can’t see any future ahead of us anymore.” “I can’t see myself being nagged by you everytime”. His heart is not even waivered and he seems really firm with his decision.
This was 4 mouths ago. Then we saw us again had dinner, he was absolutly crazy about me but he was also pretty clear saying that he loving is new life and wants to stay single for some years.lol So when we were in the car i convince him to do it one last time. He was all ” thats not correct we still have feelings and i know what i want” we did it and it was more incredible. After that he writes me saying im amazing and he wants to do it again..
Don’t get sucked into a prolonged discussion from this point. Don’t try to work anything out. Simply wish her well, give her a hug and leave the conversation and the room. She may follow you and attempt to keep the conversation going. She may start asking you questions or demanding answers. Don’t give in to her requests. You’re not obligated to give her any answers anymore – she ended the relationship. You have changed the rules of the game and the chips haven’t even had the chance to hit the floor.
Act like nothing is wrong. Even if your guts are tumbling like clothes in a washing machine, try not to let her know. She's probably not going to want you back if you're acting depressed, mopey, or sulky. Make sure you're laughing and genuinely trying to have a good time. You might find that you've become a happier person along the way. If you are feeling depressed, surround yourself with friends or family. Don't wait alone in a corner and just hope for her to come back to you.
If you do happen to hear through the grapevine that your ex is seeing someone new, try not to jump to conclusions or let jealousy set in. By no means should you do anything to try to thwart a new relationship. Let your ex have some time to find out if you are really the one; you don't want to force a person to be with you who really wants to be with someone else.