My ex ended it just a couple of days ago, we were fighting over stupid things and we just struggled to compromise with each other. He says he just doesn’t want to be in a relationship anymore, but I miss and love him Sooo much! We used to have fights were we almost broke up but it was then fine, so I’m struggling with this because all the other times it was okay because we knew how much we loved each other. But the times we fought were mostly over text because we only got to see each other once or twice a week so, so much of our communication was over text. But when we were together it was perfect and we were so in love. I’m just struggling so much right now I just don’t know what to do. I know everyone keeps saying you just need time and then see how it is but it’s just soooo hard. all I want to do is talk to him! We have ended on good term atm cos we agreed to be friends. I don’t know if I should still have hope we could be together again or I should just move on!
The first thing that you need to do is simple, stop talking to them. You need to drop communication completely. You absolutely need to stop this overall. Many people feel the need to text them back, call them back, or just try to be in their sight. Don’t do that. You have to cut everything out. Walk away, stop talking, stop texting, and walk away from social media. When you talk to them after the break up, you’re going to end up causing them to think that you’re not quite as good as she once thought. You don’t want her to justify the reason why she walked away.
I’m confused… I was with my ex for 3 years n 6mthns n he cheated on me but when he was with her and he went to work he would call me n tell me he miss me n love me n want to b back with me. He’ll say things like I choose the wrng girl she’s controlling. Well 5 months go by without talkin n we was back together having sex , going out, having with each others family, but she jus kept texting him n calling him then she made up a lie saying she was pregnant by him n she really wasn’t but I feel like he still lover her because he reply back to her texts n calls her when I’m not around. Yesterday we out and he dropped me off at home and supposedly went home or to his dad’s but I called his house his roommate sayd he didn’t come home last night n I called his dad house n they said he didn’t come over, so I started to get worried n I called his cell phone n it keeps going to voicemail, but my mind is telling me he’s with her… I still love him but I’m tired of the heart ache n him lying to me every time he opens his mouth, we was talkin bout getting married next year. I need Advice pls help!!
About 2 weeks ago, after an intense brunch date he texts me saying he doesn’t think I am capable of or know how to be in a solid relationship. He listed all my flaws (he was right about some of it) and he pretty much said he didn’t want to be in a relationship where his girlfriend showed no emotion. Other hurtful things were said and I was blindsided by it all.
Act like nothing is wrong. Even if your guts are tumbling like clothes in a washing machine, try not to let her know. She's probably not going to want you back if you're acting depressed, mopey, or sulky. Make sure you're laughing and genuinely trying to have a good time. You might find that you've become a happier person along the way. If you are feeling depressed, surround yourself with friends or family. Don't wait alone in a corner and just hope for her to come back to you.
My first ever boyfriend of 4 years plus broke up with me by saying “let’s just be friends”, “I don’t see a future with you anymore, I’ve tried but I just can’t.”, “You’ve to understand that it’s not you, it’s me. Even if you change, I’ll still be the same and eventually the same problem will unfold and we’ll quarrel again”. I’ve sent him threads of messages saying I’ll change and will be able to overlook issues and gradually hope that things will change for the better, but he seems to have made up his mind and wanna end this relationship with me.
Dude… be chill. I overreacted at first too but it was more so because there is a child involved. Mine left just a few days ago as well. The first day she texted me back a few times but then she either changed her number or just let her minutes run out (prepaid). But after looking through some of these sites… I took their advice. Start working out…. like wayyy harder than you normally do. Get the testosterone and endorphins flowing. It will take your mind off shit. It’s amazing how much similar your story is to mine. We had just talked about marriage a few weeks ago. I am going to give it about another week or so and see what happens. It’s amazing how much a little time away will make things much more manageable with your emotions. It will be hard to make that first leap to contacting her but just be subtle with it. Don’t go all Rambo gotta come back now guy. Just be polite and reasonable. Don’t have any thing set that should happen. Read her. If she is accepting to it… go on with your bad self. If not… say something chill… like “well… I just want you to know that I had fun while it lasted. Take care and I’ll see you around.” And walk the fuk away.
St. Jude I ask that you find it in your heart to pray for me and my boyfriends relationship. I ask that you take away any temptation my boyfriend may have or remove any other individual that will come between our relationship. Help him to be aware of how much I care and love him. I ask that you help our relationship be strong, loving, honest, and respectful. In the name of the father the son and the holy spirit. AMEN –
Lord, I have come to you today to surrender to you all the load I carry in my heart. I have come to you to Thank You for blessing me with someone like him. Lord, you know how much love I have for him, and you know the pain I am going through right now. I pray to you to please heal our hearts with all the frustrations, the pain, the anger, the sorrow and all the damages. I pray to you to please Lord help us save the relationship we have. Lord i have come to you to ask you to please keep us stronger just like we were before, that the love we have for each other will always be unconditional as the love you have for the both of us, I have come to you to ask of you to please keep us together that we may face whatever wrath is going to be thrown at us and that we may overcome the struggles we are facing now and the years to come. Lord I know you know how much I want him to become a part of my life, to have him and share with him the remaining years of my life, I ask of you to please continue to bless our love with the help of your grace that we may keep the affection and the care that we have for each other until our last breath. Lord, I ask of you to please guide us through this bump we are facing, and for the years to come. Amen
But sometimes filling your life with positive things is not enough. In fact, having a good vibe isn’t really about having the things you love around you or trying to imprint the idea that you feel good into your mind. It’s more about removing the self-destructive, negative thinking (and the behavior that the negative thinking creates) – i.e. changing the lens that you see the world yourself and your situations through.
Thank you for this article. My bf and I got back together after a year apart. I broke up with him because I did not feel he was going to take it to the next step. Engagement. He tried to reach out to me during that time. But I never picked up. He called ,e out of the blue and for some reason I picked up. He said he was still in love with me and he had moved and wanted me to come and visit. Came to me as a surprise because I am pretty sure he has been dating. I never stopped loving him and it made it hard for me to even start a new relationship. So about a month ago I called him and told him I would visit. It was great. We laughed, joked talked about what we did wrong before and how we would change it. He told me we should take things slowly one day at a time. I agreed. But my emotions are running so fast and I think I was “over expressing” myself. Anyway he said it seems like I am getting ahead of myself again and he really wants to take things slowly. It made me feel bad until I read your article. I will follow the steps. We have gotten past a few of them. I really don’t want to mess things up. We both love each other like crazy and we have such good chemistry. He tells me everything like he has always done and I do the same. I think I will build on that. I also talked about the past yesterday and he did not like that because we’d already discussed it and he said he had put it behind him and did not want to be reminded of it. Thank you for this.
Focus on patterns. Rather than blaming each other, consider how patterns from each of you has led to problems. For instance, maybe you consistently forget to call home when you're going to be late, and your partner then gets upset when you don't show up. Consequently, you punish him or her the next time by not calling home, which is a cyclical pattern. When you bring it up, focus on how to solve the problem, such as "I will try to be better about calling home, if maybe you can forgive me the few times that I forget. Or maybe you can send me a text near the end of the day, so I will be more aware of what time it is."
Talk to his friends. If you have mutual friends or if his friends would be willing to talk to you without telling your ex about it, consider asking them what they think the chances are that your ex would want to get back together with you. They are more likely than you to know if he has a new girlfriend or if he's dying to get back together with you.
Not every long-term relationship should last even longer. In this connection I always think of two candidates for the worst marriage ever. One patient was a man, the other a woman. Some of what they endured was similar. Both marriages were childless. The man put up with persistent infidelities on his wife’s part, often with his friends. She did not work, did not take care of their house or dogs, (which she insisted on buying) and was an alcoholic. She sometimes struck him, once with a hammer. She might have been delusional. She accused him of wiring the house to spy on her. When I asked him why he was putting up with her, he said, “I love her.” The marriage only broke up finally when she went on vacation with one of his friends and never returned.
So this girl broke up with me last week and during the weekend I was really drunk, and I was talking to someone about how I felt and I said some pretty messed up things that are just terrible, and I don’t remember who the person was but the person that I told everything too they told her and I up finding out Tuesday or Monday and she was just really upset she told my friend everything and the things I said were really really messed up they were really wrong and I didn’t think about what I said I just said things because I was so drunk and now I just want her back. But now I just gotta face the consequences and I can’t do it myself I just need someones help, but anything contact me at 862-812-9341. I also heard she made her mind up already, it’s only been a week so I don’t think so, but she did block me on everything someone just help me, she meant the world to me.
My boyfriend and I have been together for about five years. In December we got into an argument because I thought he was ignoring my plans I had with my family. We normally see family together during the holidays so I expected him to be on point. Anyway, I was about to leave and asked him what’s on his agenda and he just ignored me. I got mad and cursed him out and left. Days after I text to find out why he was ignoring me and he did not reply. Some time passed and he then said we need some space because I constantly curse him out and he is tired of it. He said that I am jealous and insecure which is a recurring theme in our arguments. Weeks passed and we just cordial over the phone. I tried not to be clingy because he said that we have to learn to be friends and give each other space in order to try and repair the relationship. He visited me in January and we talked somewhat and ended up sleeping together. We were cordial for a couple days and he kept saying how much he loves me and wants to have a family with me. I then asked if that means that we are back together and he said we never broke up but we still need space. Some time passed and we kept sending each other messages and stuff. I really missed him and asked when are we going to be out of this phase and he said as long as it takes for me to fix my ways. I told him that he has things to work on too. He said he knows he is not perfect but we keep fighting over the same things and he is tired of it. Recently he came to see me and brought an unexpected gift. I thought he was going to stay but he did not. I wanted him so badly that I slept with him. A few days after I asked about seeing him for Valentines Day and he said “why did we break up again?” I said “You said we were not broken up” He said that we still need space. I said I was confused because he keeps sending me messages about missing me and wanting to be with me and we are intimate but yet we are “just friends for now”. Mind you, when we text it is not about anything sexual. If he sees where a conversation is headed that way he stops it. Now we got into a huge fight over the phone because I said I do not know what he wants from me and I am fed up of waiting. He said talking to me is pointless because I do not get where he is coming from. I told him that he does not get where I am coming from either and I will just leave him alone. He said that he does not give a f#$% and that I should do what I want to because he is not getting through to me. I try to understand him honestly I do but I do not think he sees it. I love him with all my heart but I fear this is it for us. Sigh. Any advice?
My ex loved me like crazy and i didnt quite value it. I broke up with him 6 months back. And then i realized i loved him, so i became clingy and irritating and moody, things got worse and it was the first time that he told me that he didnt want to get back. We were best friends from 3 years, and we dated for 8 months. Now he has come back, he just wants to be friends, though he is not dating anyone. I am so in love with him!! He says he loves me when he is drunk but something else when he is sober. He is giving me so many mixed signals that it hurts. I have no idea what to do.
Please save our relationship. I come to you cause my hurts without the that i love he is my everything. I just dont understand where we lost each other we are two strong persons in willing. I pray that he will come and find his way back to me. We love each other i know that we do. We just need your hands to guide us back to one another. I know in my heart i bleed for all forgiveness that done wrong and i know he has done wrong as much as i have plz forgive us and give us the strength to find our way back to each other in the name of Jesus Christ our saviour plz help us to be together💔
Right now you may not believe that all these can push your girlfriend further away and cancel out your chances of getting her back. What can actually help you will seem meaningless, but it is a mistake to think so. There are entire methodologies created to explain female psychology! In this book you will learn the steps you can take to get your girlfriend to become agreeable and pleasant. She will unlikely be able to resist you. It is just the way women are built.
my bf left me for another girl.he keeps telling me that i am nothing to him.he wants to b with the other girl.he has no feeling for me anymore.this has started more than one year ago.by this time he also speak to me but not on his own mood or to rebuild our relationship.he does so becz i request him to be with me at least for some hours or some minute… we talk only 2 or 3 days per a week…but I can’t stay without him I want him back.plzz help me…if this is possible for me to get him back as my bf again??
I enjoyed reading your above article and while most of it is useful to me, my situation is a little more complex. The ex that I want back isn’t a recent ex. we broke up in high school. Well I say broke up but more like I just ignored him (give me a break I was 16). He didnt treat me bad and neither of us cheated on each other. He was my first real boyfriend and I realized that this could be way more then I was emotionally prepared for. After high school I emailed him apologizing for my stupid behavior and immaturity but he didn’t reply. Karma at its finest! I told myself then that ‘well I trided, move on’ Recently while reading another article he came into mind and hasn’t left. He has consumed my brain. He lives on the other side of the country and has a girlfriend (I can add Facebook stalker to my resume now) I know I hurt him but I feel like we have “unfinished business”. How do I get his attention again?How do I make him want to contact me even if it is to tell me to go pound sand?
After the breakup I did the whole crazy ex girlfriend thing then just stopped talking to him completely for 3months. We started talking again when we both turned up at our club unexpectantly and I apologised and asked him to hang out. But, I didnt feel like he was hearing me so I full on lost it a few times. And now we are back to not talking for a month now but we still see each other around at our club. I’d also made the mistake of telling him that I wanted to start the relationship from scratch and he baulked at that.
Well, now you have to meet your ex. When you contact your ex, you need to ask them to meet you. But do not call it a date. Do not even talk about getting back together. Just say you want to “catch up” or “hang out together”. Try to keep it short, like a lunch or coffee. The date has to be in setting where you can leave easily if you sense that things are going south.
I ask today that you strengthen the relationship between my boyfriend and I. I ask that you give him peace of heart and mind that he can trust me completely and to remove his insecurity and doubt. May he see how much I love, appreciate and accept him. I ask for your guidance and strength and for our love for one another to continue to grow from strength to strength.
Another year goes by. It was summer and I was having the time of my life. I decided to take a break from dating and focus on myself. Then I ran into him in Central Park on a Saturday afternoon. At last, he was single and I was single, we were both living in NYC, now was the time. But he didn’t contact me after that. So I decided to contact him. I sent him a friendly message on Facebook and opened the door wide for him to ask me out… but he didn’t take my expertly laid out bait.
You know something is wrong if you are always crying or feeling bad about what has happened and you can quite get over it. You also know it can be frustrating when you can seem to figure out what to text or what to say to your ex bf. Well, the solution is you can join my Private Facebook Support Group and/or pick up your copy of the Texting Bible and get the emotional support and answers your need.
Okay so me & my ex boyfriend broke up like a couple months ago. Me and him have been dating for over a year. Ever since we got into high school he changed. He’s like every other guy now. During our relationship, he would cry when I left or if I took the bracelet he gave me off. I just really want him back, I still do love him. I honestly need to know what to do. Help me please
I still obsess (2 months) about the relationship. I miss being a part of a family, I miss having dinner with him, the sex was mindblowing, sleeping next to him, the lazy weekends and the busy doing things together weekends, waiting for him to come home from work, I miss “our” home, his daughters, his family, Sunday afternoon cookouts at his moms…. I still have the most horrible days when I believe it was all my fault and I was just not good enough and will never be good enough for anyone. I let him do that to me. And yes, I sometimes want that back, him back… Yet, somehow I know that, eventually I will be ok, better than ever. Wish it would get here faster!
I need some suggestions I want my ex-girlfriend back I’m sure of it she broke up with me 4 months ago and has been with somebody else that same amount of time…..thruout that time all I have been saying to her is she made a mistake leaving me I want her back I miss her love her I have been blowing her phone up and she changed her number because of it I need to know even tho I did all of these things is there still a way I could get her to love me again and take me back and I have to work with her bf she’s with now
Alright, so the biggest thing I want you to focus on for the no contact period is the fact that you are using this month to become the best version of yourself that you have ever been. There is a 100% chance, especially if you are ignoring him, that your ex is going to check up on you during this period and instead of sulking around feeling sorry for yourself he is going to see a strong, sexy, fun-having woman!
I seek your blessing in this junction of my life. All my love life was a faliure and end up broken for years..Since my last husband dissapered and took everything I owned. My life just fell & I was broken and mentally trauma too. But after 7+ years I met someone who liked me crazily and needed me more than ever… As very matured adults we started getting to know each other over past couple of months.. It was with his interest that I too started liking him and we are compatible in many ways and our hobbies to coencodice.. Suddnly he is drifting away from me. I started feeling the need and the urge he had to communicate is dying down. And his visits to my plc too dropped. Now it has come to a standstill. Dear lord my god & the Holy Spirit I seek you divine inter vision as this situation to change. Last I spoke to him was more than a week ago. And he mentioned that we should continue our special bond and seren relationship that we have and how I hv changed his thinking to doing things differently & much more positively.
Negative responses do not feel good at all. It really sucks and can feel like the end of the world especially if you put a lot of work into getting your ex boyfriend back. Your best bet in these situations is to simply not respond at all and understand that your ex is still processing their emotions. It doesn’t necessarily mean that all hope is lost it just means you may need to be more patient and try again in a week or so.
Here is where he gets to see the beautiful woman you are in person. He gets to witness your positive vibe and new and improved look in the flesh. Like the reach out stage, there are no “rules” here. The light and fun vibe you brought to the conversations you’ve previously had should shine through just as bright. If your positive vibe is derived from genuine positive thoughts and emotions, interacting with him should be easy and effortless.
My ex broke up with me saying that he just lost himself in the relationship. For the first eight months that we knew each other, I was not ready to dated to a very bad relationship before him, so he continued to pursue me and try to prove that he was different. He was the perfect boyfriend for the almost three years that we were together, and he was also the one who really wanted a commitment and future. We had our entire lives together planned out from the wedding to traveling to kids. We ended up spending all of our time together and not doing anything else with anybody else. Needless to say we smothered each other to the point where we were arguing over stupid things. We had classes together for another month after our breakup which was very hard for me. Initially he was very nice to me and would be willing to talk with me about the breakup any time I was upset. He told me that he just didn’t want to be in a relationship for maybe years to come because he really needed to focus on finding himself. By the end of our relationship, I think we had both lost ourselves, and I do feel like the breakup was necessary in order for us both to get our own identities back. He was very depressed at the end of our relationship, and it was during that last month that things started to fall apart. He started seeing a therapist as well. However, after a few weeks he jumped into something with somebody else (His status still said single) and changed his Facebook profile picture to a picture of the two of them together. He started being very mean to me over text and made it clear that he was very happy. People are saying that he wants a reaction out of me. So, I stopped contacting him. It’s been maybe two weeks, but I blocked him on social media because it was too hard for me to see those things and I didn’t want to make myself crazy. His whole family are still friends with me on Facebook. Everybody seems to think he will be back eventually, but that I need to focus on myself in the meantime. I was wondering if you think blocking him would ruin our chances of getting back together. I’m also afraid that he will be afraid to give things another chance because he’ll be afraid we will fall into old habits. I want him to see that I’m making positive changes and learning from this, but I don’t know how. I’m afraid that by avoiding his problems things are only getting worse for him. I need advice please!!!
Hi my boyfriend always use to talk with for a couple of days later he will fight and we wont be in contact for 3-6 months after thathe will msg me and he will b normal as before and again he will fight and wont b in contact for 3-6 months this is go on repeating from 3 years i cant understand whether he loves me or hates me but i love him so much just suggest me how to make him mine completely