And while we’re talking about jealousy, you should also try to refrain from reacting if he posts a picture with a girl, or likes a girl’s social media posts, or even if he starts dating a girl. Jealousy is ugly, unattractive, and destructive. Maybe you’re hurt that he seems to be moving on, but lashing out at him is not going to swing the pendulum back in your favor. And you really don’t know what’s going on. Maybe it’s a rebound fling, maybe the girl in the picture is his cousin, who knows and who cares? This is not where you should be putting your attention at the moment.
Hey I need help! So me and my ex broke up 2 weeks ago. I tried to get her back at first but stopped after I saw it wasn’t working. I just started the no contact phase and am giving her time it’s been 3 days no contact. I’m fine with the no contact but here’s the tricky part, shes getting surgery Tuesday(4 days from now) and is really nervous. When we were together I was a jerk and didn’t make a big deal about it and it hurt her. So now what Idk is should I text her the night before and say something about it like goodluck don’t be nervo use it’ll be okay, just good luck or nothing at all? Help please!!
Apologize. Think deeply about anything you did or didn't do that somehow contributed to the downfall of the relationship, and clean the slate by giving your ex a proper apology. Take full responsibility for the offense, without blaming your ex, giving excuses, or expecting an apology (or even forgiveness) in return. It may very well be that your ex contributed to the situation, but you cannot apologize for someone else; you can only apologize for yourself. Leave him or her out of it and odds are the apology will be reciprocated. 

I have a problem likes it… My boyfriend and I were together for 1 year and half. in fact from 6 months age our relationship became so complicated and it was my fault! last week he told me that he wants to be just friend…since next week he gonna go to another country, where he studies, and he won’t come back till 3 months I’m really confused about what should I do! :| So if you find any efficient way…tell me plZ!
Discuss solutions. This step may be the hardest part, coming up with solutions you both can live with. That means agreeing on what you think the main problems are in the marriage and coming up with ways you can both work to make it better. Basically, you need to compromise. Blaming each other isn't going to help, as you've both contributed to the situation you're in.[16]

I got a problem. can someone help?my boyfriend and i were together for 6 years. he has always had a drinking problem all his life.( including his family) we lived together for 3 years. last year he couldnt afford to help pay his share of the rent n bills.(he also has never had a steady job!) he had no choice but to move to another town 20 min away with 2 other guys. this was last july. since then, i seem to be makeing up excuses at times not to drive up to see him only because,for one i pay 4 his prepaid phone n he never seems to anwser so i never know if he is home or not,(lives on the 3rd floor) when he does pick up he is either drunk with his buddies or stoned,(he is very ignorant n loud when he is drunk or stoned) he says he wouldnt have to drink or smoke if i was up there.!! Im trying to teach him a lesson= call me to come over n make sure u are not high or drunk!! so am i wrong to do that? he also says i run my mouth n talk s^%$ alot. i only run my mouth to make him realize what he is doing to hurt me n the mess hes causing in our so-called relationship. past few wks he has only called every other 4 or 5 days to say he is at his moms working. Should i make more of an effort to go up 2 see him out of the blue? Or should he step up and show me he still wants me by quitting his drinking n partying? oh ya, this guy is 31 years old. a grown man.


About a month ago I found out my boyfriend of 4 months has been cheating on me. I was so confused, we have been doing so well and we were really close, I didn’t understand what made him do it. Before we started dating, we were close friends for 3 years, we told each other everything and we used to tell people that we were going to get married some day, at the time it was all a joke, I had no intention of being more then friends but he did. Anyways we got together and it was the best couple of months of my life. Then, I found out he cheated on me, he begged me for forgiveness and he said he didn’t really have a reason, he was just stupid! So we got back together 3 days after I found out. The first week we were okay, but the second week turned to chaos, I started feeling insecure, every girl that called him, texted him or took a picture with him made me cringed, I will throw tantrums and break up with him, then call him back and all he would just say is “did you get over your little tantrums?” We stopped having real conversations, it seem like he would always cut our phone calls short and tell me I talk too much, so I started picking fights with him because that’s the only way I can get his attention if we’re not having seX. all he did was apologized but he never really made the effort of making it up to me, I didn’t make him fight for me, he stop spending time with and stop calling as often as he used to. HE cheated and when I forgave him it’s like I shot myself in the foot, because he completely changed, and I have been trying to show him that I have forgiven him by sending him cute messages in the middle of the night that he can read in the morning (he’s never done anything like this, his never even called me beautiful or complimented my new hairstyles or any effort i make for him) and we can move forward but he started acting as if I cheated or I have done something wrong, so I retaliated by constantly reminding him that he cheated. Anyways his been paying me no attention, unless we’re talking about sex, he doesn’t listen to anything else I have to say. So I decided to dump him on text after I called him to confine in him and he just completely disregarded my feelings and told me his going back to sleep. I text him and told him that it’s over and that I was not over him cheating on him. it’s been in days and he has not replied, probably because i also told him i was over him and hated him(lies), he wouId already called back by now to stop me from leaving but he hasn’t. I was only breaking up with as cry for attention and affection. Though we fought so much leading to the break up, we were always great and he made me so happy in a way no other man has ever before. I feel bad because I Forgave him for cheating then dumped him After I told him he was forguven. He probably thinks I’m just crazy. What do I do? Even though I initiated the break up, I don’t want to be the one that crawls back because I will be condoning the way he’s been treating me lately, I don’t want to feel neglected again but I want him to want back so badly that he would do anything to make it work and lasts
While the normal methods for rekindling a relationship with your ex may not be successful in the case of infidelity, there are other methods that will. Your ex not only feels betrayed and hurt but she feels insecure about herself and her position as well. This situation doesn’t have to mean the end of the road. In some ways it can be easier to regain your relationship after an affair than if your breakup happened for another reason – her feelings for you never changed. She’s just too upset to recognize that they’re still there in the heat of the moment.

You are hilarious!! I am laughing so loudly whilst reading your articles….I’m scaring my dogs! I came across your website while I was googling and trying to understand why my now ex-fiance ‘assbag’ of 4 years breaks up with me (2nd time in 3 months), demands no contact then calls me, bawls during the conversation then tells me “he says he needs space” AGAIN…. he did this 3 months ago also…so now I’m thinking he’s emotionally inept and I’m left feel totally confused. But I am finding your articles are helping me alot….so thank you!!!!

Be sure to look great at all times. Don’t leave the house looking like you feel. Ever, Get a new hairstyle, go buy a dress and prance all over town in that dress. I don’t care if you go to the grocery store, get out and be seen looking better and happier than you have in years. Get your butt out of that funk you’re in and remember: Anything that he can do, you can do better. Remember that. This f*cktard seems like he needs a wakeup call. How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back


i broke my ex coz i found out he was cheated on me..the other girl use my bikini..and i did not talk to him for a week and he ask sorry and want to be friends with me so i become friends with him he spent christmas and new years in my house..new years there is something happened me and him i thougth we are go back together but looks like he dont want to see me anymore..i invite him to go out with my friends party he did reject me so i tell him i will not bother him anymore we been together for 2yrs like live together..now he text me that he miss me a lot..and im still the best ever he had..but i dont know if he want to ggo back with me or not..im still love him but i think he dont love what will i do now …i miss him a lot too…but i have to move on with my life now i did not text him anymore or even hang out with our common friends…im still confused…
My boyfriend is not really successful and it made me worry if he could support the family if we ever get to that point. It bothers me a lot. He’s 35 and I’m 23 so he’s close to that point of having a family, and we even started talking about babies and moving in. Until I met my boss, who likes me a lot. I let him bring me to some fancy places where my boyfriend can’t, he even buy me gifts. I felt good and secured coz he’s a nice guy and could take care of me. And my boyfriend caught us through my phone. I realized how much I hurt him and regret what I’ve done. I want him back but he already put restraining order for me and said leave him alone or else he’s gonna file a report of harassment if I don’t stop texting me. I want him back. I don’t wanna be with anybody. I know I did something really stupid but now I realized how much he means to me. I want things to go back to what it used to be.im ready to change and Make myself better. But do u think he’s still gonna forgive me for what I’ve done?
Im a lesbian and was with this girl for four years going 5 on july.she ask space for 3months no communication,no seeing each other so I gave her space but i broke my promise not to call,text and see her. I called her 12 times and ive been texting her also.and worst thing i did, iwent to her office so she saw me and ask what are you doing here, i told her i miss you i wanna see you.and i also ask her when she will come back and if she still love me. I keep on forcing her to answer until she pissed. So i went home and received text messages ftom her saying im not happy with what you did. I starting to hate you and you ask me if i still love you no i dont love you anymore. Now i dont know what to do? I dont wanna lose her.. pleasehelp me what to do not to lose her and to love me again..please
I seek your blessing in this junction of my life. All my love life was a faliure and end up broken for years..Since my last husband dissapered and took everything I owned. My life just fell & I was broken and mentally trauma too. But after 7+ years I met someone who liked me crazily and needed me more than ever… As very matured adults we started getting to know each other over past couple of months.. It was with his interest that I too started liking him and we are compatible in many ways and our hobbies to coencodice.. Suddnly he is drifting away from me. I started feeling the need and the urge he had to communicate is dying down. And his visits to my plc too dropped. Now it has come to a standstill. Dear lord my god & the Holy Spirit I seek you divine inter vision as this situation to change. Last I spoke to him was more than a week ago. And he mentioned that we should continue our special bond and seren relationship that we have and how I hv changed his thinking to doing things differently & much more positively.
Look, I know how hard it is to not contact the one person on this earth you want to see and speak to more than anyone else. I fully get it. But just because we want something doesn’t mean it’s in our best interest to go after it. It’s like going to the gym. Sometimes it’s really hard to summon the strength to get yourself there, but you do it because your goal is to be fit and healthy. Here, your goal is to get your ex back and have a healthy, loving, mutually fulfilling relationship. That can only come about when you’ve taken time to gain clarity and perspective.
That’s really the main aim in Step 8 here – ensure that you don’t make mistakes which would accidentally sabotage the natural getting-back-together process. There’s several common mistakes most guys make at this exact point, and it’s super important that you know WHAT those mistakes are so that you don’t fall victim to them like most do. If you’re not told what these mistakes are, I honestly believe that you WOULD fall victim to them, so let’s discuss them right now.
Now the remaining part of this website will show you psychological and practical strategies for how to get your ex-boyfriend back that you can work with to remove the feelings of neediness and insecurity. It doesn’t matter how dreadful you are feeling inside you these strategies will surely reverse the feeling of rejection that your ex boyfriend wants you to feel. This will shift the balance of power back in your relationship.
That’s really the main aim in Step 8 here – ensure that you don’t make mistakes which would accidentally sabotage the natural getting-back-together process. There’s several common mistakes most guys make at this exact point, and it’s super important that you know WHAT those mistakes are so that you don’t fall victim to them like most do. If you’re not told what these mistakes are, I honestly believe that you WOULD fall victim to them, so let’s discuss them right now.

If you’re really worried that your ex is going to get into a new relationship, or you know he’s in one and you want to find out whether it’s real or not, this article will give you the signs that his new relationship is a rebound. That way, you can get a definitive answer to the question, “Is he in a rebound relationship?” and move on with putting the no contact rule to work for you.
When negative things happen, avoid being critical or contemptuous. Don’t say things that begin with “You never…,” “You always…,” or (my favorite) “You’re such a…” Calmly explain why you see the situation, not the spouse, as negative, and why it upsets you. In the ensuing conversation don’t get defensive, but don’t refuse to talk, either. Inject a little positivity into the conversation or argument. For example, try a little humor to lighten up the situation a bit, if you think your spouse would be receptive. If the humor backfires, simply be honest and explain that you want to diffuse the tension and you really don’t want to fight.
It is natural to feel anxious and sad when this happens. Your anguish may lead you to attempt to use various manipulation tactics to get the upper hand in your relationship. But playing games to gain or regain the power in a relationship is bound to lead to its demise. There are many relationships in which one person holds more power than the other, but these tend to be extremely unhealthy. Physically or verbally abusive relationships, relationships in which one partner is cheating, and relationships in which one partner has more assets than the other (that are not common property) are often doomed to fail or to lead to heartbreak and unhappiness.

but him? he dated a lot of girls most were varsity players of volleyball from different universities. then comes this girl. a sta player of the leading team from one of the most popular and exclusive school for rich people. that girl adored my ex bf and i know my ex reciproacates her feelings. she is so popular rich and i honestly say that she is cute too. but i am not having insecurities from that girl. i know im not ugly and it is just being rich and popular is not in the cards for me. my problem is my ex told me that he loves us both. and cant make up her mind who to choose. he still controls me. he replied and answers call from my guy friends and admirers. but i told him i dont have any plans of replacing him. by the way we still live together. but he is seeing that other girl from time to time. he even has the nerve to tell all the deails of their dates. i dont know if he is just trying to make me jealous or he is just being a complete jerk. the other day he told me that he is choosing me over that girl but yesterday he was with a date with her. i love him so much and weve been together for two years. what should i do? sigh
I don’t think anyone should worry so much about getting him or her back. Sometimes relationships just don’t work and that’s okay. Sure, it hurts like hell, but that doesn’t matter as much. Don’t stay in relationships. And for godsake if he dumps you, then just get on with life. You shouldn’t be begging and pleading to get back together with someone who treated you poorly. Yes, you probably made mistakes but the point should be that so did he. You’re not the only one at fault here. Try to remember that, when you want to get back together with him, just think do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? Not only that but if one night can make up his mind, then do you really want him? There are better guys out there that actually care about more than sex. You can do so much better. Take time to heal yourself and worry about fixing yourself for you.
Italiano: Riconquistare la Tua Ex, Português: Conseguir Seu ou Sua Ex de Volta, Deutsch: Deine Ex zurück gewinnen, Français: reconquérir son ex, Русский: вернуть своего бывшего, 中文: 与你的前男友或前女友重新开始, Nederlands: Je ex terugwinnen, Čeština: Jak získat svoji bývalou dívku zpět, Español: recuperar a tu ex, 日本語: 別れた恋人とよりを戻す, Bahasa Indonesia: Mendapatkan Mantan Pacar Anda Kembali, العربية: استعادة شريكك السابق, ไทย: ได้แฟนเก่ากลับมา, Tiếng Việt: Giành lại người yêu cũ, 한국어: 전 애인과 다시 결합하는 방법, हिन्दी: अपने एक्स को वापस पायें, Türkçe: Eski Sevgili Nasıl Geri Kazanılır
Me and my ex met at work. We hit it off the first couple weeks were heaven. We had so much in common and never stopped laughing to the point where we would annoy my roommates. After those few weeks we started dating and he would come stay at my house alot because he lived a town away. The first couple months were great. I started to realize he had trust issues and drank way too much. I left him and he asked me back he quit drinking. I took h back and it was even better then the first time but a few months down the road his jealousy started again and I was very mean to him because of it. He had broken up with me told me he didn’t love me anymore, said he wasn’t attracted and he had someone else. I got so hurt I went out with my best friend and got really drunk. I gave a guy my number because I was so mad at my ex I wanted to make him feel the same way. I ended up calling him after I did that because I knew I didn’t want anyone else. I patched things up and we made up. I never told him about me giving my phone number out because I didn’t want to mess it up. I never spoke to the guy after that night, he never even text. Maybe a month swum the road and things were coming together nicely and the guy from the night out text, my boyfriend saw it. I came clean although we were broken up he is still hurt and feels like he was right all along to not trust me. Just when he was starting to trust that I was different. I know I want to change and not take him for granted like I did or put my friends first. I love him so much and I don’t know what to do. He says he doesn’t want to be together anymore but he says things like he doesn’t want to be around my friend anymore and that he’s moving back home with or without me. He says there is no chance but says things like that. What do I do? I know I messed up by trying to get back at him but it never went farther than giving my number.

You have to look at both negative and positive aspects of your ex and your relationship. Every couple on the face of this planet fights, but if you two broke up, then chances are there was something seriously wrong with your relationship. Think about your relationship rationally. Don’t let your emotions control your thoughts. Imagine, you are a parent and your child was in the same situation as you, would you still tell your son or daughter to get their ex back?

The best way to optimize your chances of getting your ex bf back is to become Ungettable Girl.  You want to increase your value in his eyes and also make it difficult for him to reach you, talk to you, and see you.  This is just a small part of becoming the Ungettable Girl.  It’s also about making yourself beautiful in his eyes from afar.  He can see you, but now it is at a distance (through Snap chat, Facebook, etc).   Slowly over time, your ex boyfriend will crave you and you will do things to ensure that he feels that craving every day by using little jealousy ploys and rumors and chance encounters.  Your ex boyfriend loves nothing more than a good chase – so give him one.
Sooo, I reconnected with a girl I knew a couple of decades ago. I had a huge crush on her but both of us were married. I’m not now and spent a lot of time on self improvement, which she gravitated towards as she works her way out of another marriage. After about three months of platonic self help counseling we caved…it was intense for about two months; she started working with a counselor to save the marriage/amicably divorce and suggested I pursue other women for awhile. I backed off, maintaining contact via text/cell about every 3 days; not too heavy subjectwise. Made the mistake of telling her I was doing great without her. After that she shut off contact, and responded to my attempts with a hostile voicemail telling me to stop all contact. I went into no contact mode for two weeks, sent a couple of happy holiday texts, then wrote the no contact letter. A week later her husband comes up and introduces himself, tells me he’s in the middle of his divorce and she’s eligible now but has a boyfriend. I reach out for confirmation and to give her a heads up and ask for a meet and am given a letter with all the nevers (never want to talk to you, never want to see you, never be friends, etc) and threatening to go to the cops over stalking. I know I should cut and run but we got so close in those early months…I don’t want to give that up. I also don’t her throwing the stalking card out to everyone…most of all…don’t want the anger, nor do I understand it. How do I turn this around to platonic at the least and repair it to a couple at best? Yeah I called texted lettered about 20 times in 80 days and maybe drove by her house twice but STALKING? I never raised my voice to this woman.
Your story is very similar to mine. He was dating another girl but i didnt know it. He came back to me several times but didnt want to work things out so i blocked him from social media. that was three months ago. He has been dating that girl for several months even when when he was trying to convince me that he still loved me and missed me but because of my shortcomings he couldnt be with me. Now they are a couple and he hasnt tried to reach out. i changed my number though.

My ex and I were dating for 4 months. It wasn’t like any other relationship I have ever had! We were always having fun. He was a police officer that worked really long hours and on the night shift, I am an office manager who keeps daytime hours. As time progressed it grew harder to see one another but we still made time for one another. We never argued or fought really. Seriously everything went so smoothly, he was caring, and kind, and super sweet, and always went out of his way to show me that. Well when we first met, he told me he was in the process of buying a house, it was going to be about an hour away, well this made me uneasy but he was always reassuring me that we could make things work. Well one sunday afternoon before he was going to work i sent him a text to see what we were doing the next day, well his response was i don’t know i have yo close on my house tomorrow. Ummmmm wait a minute what house? His response was you knew I was buying a house. So i was loke leaving him alone at that point a few hours later, mind you he was at work, i text him i don’t think this is going to work you are nocturnal i am not we both work hard and its already difficult to see eachother and you live 15 mins away. anyways he told me he needed time to dedicate the conversation to. I said olay and goodnight and went to bed. I spent the next day pampering myself preparing for the worse, he texts me and acts like nothing had happened, i tell him we need to have a conversation, he said he needed time to sort things out, welll i pressured him and he agreed staying together would just be delaying the inevitable i cried he puked, i realized i had been overreacting and apologized and well he hasnt accepted my apology. I went on vacation a few days later and he watched my animals while i was gone, when i was away we kept minimal contact, relatively amicable, but when i got home i found a very expensive goft i had bought him months prior for his new house in the bottom of my laundry basket at this point i flipped out called him every name in the book and told him to get his coward ass to my house to drop off my keys. A day and a half later he showed up gave me my keys we say 3 or 4 words. I shut the door and lock itm i immediately apologize for my behavior but i told him i didn’t want him to see me upset. Now we don’t even speak. I am so hurt and distraught. I know we were together a short time, but i have been in 2 very long term relationships and i can tell you i have never felt the way i felt about him about any other person in my life. I don’t know what to do. I am so sorry, I apologized a milliom ways and he just doesn’t seem to care anymore. And he hasn’t tried once to contact me on his own in over 2.5 weeks.


The love that you and a woman share NEVER goes away. What happens is that the love gets pushed into the background because of all the negative feelings in the foreground. To get back in touch with the loving feelings you once experienced with each other, you need to make changes to your behavior and how you treat her. When you do this correctly, the love naturally comes flooding back. 

First, your acquaintances will unfollow you and seeing the negativity, they won’t even want to go near you or introduce new people to you. Second, new friends will all know that you’re sad and don’t want to know you more or else they’ll get infected with your sadness. Third, for the friends who really care about you — you can just go the traditional way and meetup with them and cry your eyes out.
I ask you God to please bless me and my kids father’s relationship to be stronger and for him to not leave me and go off to another female or move our if our place together. Please God of I didn’t need you more then any time in my life I need you now .I promise I will not do anything to unsure are relationship I promise I keep my word please God please bless me through our kids please I need you right now God more then anytime time in my life save my relationship with my kids father and make it healthy please In the name of Jesus we do pray AMEN thank God
So my boyfriend broke up with me two weeks before Christmas and I’ve tryed everything to get him back. It looks like its hopeless even though we are really good friends now and he seems into me again. I just don’t know if I should see if he really ever liked me or if he still does. We’ve been together before, although it took a year and a half to get back together. I’m wondering of the spark is still there!

Well I think you have kicked yourself in the A** my friend, first of you did not respect his space once going home after he already assured you that things were ok by making up with you before leaving back home. Secondly you felt the need to idk… “Make sure” he was REALLY ok and still “Wanted me” you felt the need to turn simi stalker on him when everything was ok if you just went home went about your life kept normal communication open keep yourself up go to the gym, keep up with school & friends but no you turn all your attention focusing on issues that weren’t even there. So now he’s at the point to where in his eyes i have to be honest you are emotionally unstable and are possibly the kind of girl that given the right situation or get your angry enough you might do harm to him or get physical in some way YES you put yourself in the CRAZY box! Nothing right now is going to change his mind right now the best thing you can do is LEAVE HIM ALONE, cut all communication with him let him get in touch with you i repeat DO NOT CONTACT HIM AGAIN! if he chooses to get in touch with you he will if he doesn’t…. well you know why.

Wow that was a lot huh? I mean, we haven’t even started contacting our exes yet have we? Well, right now is when we begin that step. Are you excited? Alright, there is a lot of debate about this step. Every expert (myself included) seems to have a different opinion on the method you should use for contacting an ex. Some recommend writing a get your boyfriend back letter, some say you should give them a call and some even say you should text. So, what is the best method?

please help me out. my ex broke up with with because she said she was tired of the relationship. i met another lady and we are dating. My ex girl who was in the states has now come back to the country and wants us to trash our differences and make up. but am in another relationship and i love this new girl. However, seeing my ex girl again brought back memories and the love i had for her but scared she will be stubborn again. i dont know who should i continue my life with since my current girl has done nothing to me and also loves me
It may be sound terrible to you but there is no way to say it in soft words so I can say it loud to you. You have to end your contact with your ex boyfriend for full 21 days. There is no exception to this rule. It doesn’t matter how much you are missing him right now you have to end contacting your ex boyfriend if you want him to get back in your life. This rule is based on strong psychological mechanism and it is proven to work.
Okay, so it’s been a month since our breakup, which he initiated by saying that he wasn’t feeling ‘OK’ with himself so he could, therefore, not be with anyone else, that he was hurting me with his hot and cold attitude (true) and that I deserved so much better. It broke my heart, but after that conversation, I went to his place (I had offered like the weekend to think about it, but he was gonna go away to the beach with friends to ‘clear his head’ and it just was too much for me) that night to break it off. He didn’t let me come into his place, sent his grandma to tell me he wasn’t there, told her I saw him and that I’d wait but only a little while ’cause it was late. He came out, same argument but now backed up by my “I do deserve better”, “I do deserve someone who will fight for me” and his “Let’s be friends”, “I don’t want you to disappear from my life” and “I will always care for you”. I naively believed all this and we were supposed to meet that weekend so he could give me some of my stuff, I got a message late telling me he was sick in bed and couldn’t, so I asked what should we do about it (mistake, I know :/) and then another week went by and didn’t hear from him, so I sent him a subtle text asking for my stuff back that I didn’t wanna fight and there was no point to him ignoring me but… he just kept on ignoring me. BTW, I did stop texting except for yesterday and the day before to pick up my stuff. So, he didn’t reply (he lives far so I didn’t wanna show up and him not there :/) but I went with a gf who sorely hates him and wanted this over and done with for me to move on. Texted him I was a block away, he was so surprised (Um, he could’ve checked his phone when he was online?) and was like “So, you’re getting your stuff and then just leaving?” and I said “Of course, what else do you expect?” and he replied “I don’t know, just asking”. So, he came out and I handed him his stuff, said I didn’t have to bother and asked what I brought. Stupidly, I started to tell him each item but then stopped and just handed him the bag, he handed me my stuff and he was about to talk to me when my friend said “We gotta go, got plans, remember?” and I snapped out of it and just waved and said “Well, take care, bye” and he just looked at me all shocked and ‘sentimental’ (something was going on there, no idea what kind of feelings, confusion?) and I turned around before he closed the door.
We tay together but we arent together as of right now , what he did was start texting goin out, not coming home till the next day kinda relation ,no sex though i woulda had a feeling.. nothing real serious .. He tells me he just want the other girl money and nothing more & that he is still in love with. Me and can never fall for anyone else .. but i know the other girl wont stop texting/calling once this is over and i really love him and i dont wanna leave nor give up on what we’ve become .. what to do ..
I lost the love of my life over something stupid that I did. Long story short, I lied about my age. Although she didn’t care about my real age, it was the lie I carried on for a year that was part of the reason we broke up. She came from an emotionally abusive marriage and had baggage from that. And two kids who I came to love dearly – and who got along very well with mine. I know that she had issues stemming from childhood, specifically trust. But she’s an awesome girl – the love of my life, my parallel. But I messed up – I lied. Honestly, the lie started because I was afraid that she would be turned off when we first met (she’s 28 and I’m 48)…so I told her I was 44. Every time she brought up age stuff, I steered the conversation away. I wanted to tell her so many times but I knew that if I did that would end things. So I let it go and my heart is breaking because of it. It was her abusive ex-husband who cued her in and she defended me to him until I admitted it. Now, she won’t have anything to do with me. The breakup ended VERY BADLY. Probably the worst I’ve ever experience. Yelling/screaming/crying/etc. She said she can’t believe a word I said and felt like I used her for sex. She said that if I ever contacted her again that I’d be sorry. So I haven’t. At first after the breakup I did what everyone does – texted/called/emailed. I didn’t know of these steps. At any rate, she won’t talk and the last time we did I was met with extreme hostility. I know this one is done. Had I followed this advice there might have been a chance. But I doubt even that. Lessons learned the hardest of all ways. I wanted to marry her. It would have been my second and her third. I love her with all my heart and soul – she his my parallel. The yin to my yang.

We had been living together for almost 4 years. At first I broke up with him because of his actions (going out a lot lately, did not care to let me know, no sex, lame sex, pitty sex, no meaningful conversations, etc). I gotta accept I expected him to react on this and just promise we would work things out, he kind of did at the beggining but then he just went for it and took off. I was shocked and the two days after the break up I tried to contact him over the phone, texts, waiting for him at work. All things I could imagine. Not proud of it right now. But hey, I was desperate. Well it did not work, he told me he had made his decision and there was no going back. I was a wreck. Because of the time we had been together we shared some bank accounts and financial duties, so I needed to get in touch with him to solve all that out. It has been a week from the break up and we are yet to meet. He says he has no time because he is looking for a new place to stay and that he has other things to do right now, but that he will let me know. Meanwhile I have all his stuff still in my apartment, pictures, clothes, etc. It is really hard. But I have decided to just leave it as it is. Will not contact him again, unless he does and see if when we meet again something has changed, otherwise I guess I’ll just have to move on. I am working out and renewing my closet haha, keeps my mind out of all this. Any advice?
I was with my ex for almost 8 years… it’s always been an on and off kindof thing because we were young and dumb in the beginning and then we would argue over parenting, money, the usual stuff. So anyways a year ago I moved out and the kids and I went to live with my grandma. We got back together… things were going really good actually until my grandmother got diagnosed with stage four lung cancer in May and then it was like I was put into over load with stopping working, taking care of her full time, the fact of now my gma has this disease and probably isn’t going to live and taking care of 3 dogs at the time because my brother had his here (thankfully not anymore lol) and 2 kids. My grandma raised me and so shes like a gma/mom/best friend. If I was going to Walmart my gma was going with me.. we are that close. So anyways though when all that was going on I kindof pushed him away by shutting everything out. I couldn’t cry over my gma, I didn’t want to be touched, nothing… So needless to say we separated in July after the fact I completely ruined his birthday because I did it on that day… I was yes, a complete ass. We’ve both made our mistakes and what not BUT….now he says hes “talking” to another girl that he’s interested in. but he’s confusing me because he says he has feelings for her but then he turned around and was talking about how things could always change and he want to be with me. but that he’s scared the same things are going to happen again….
These 3 steps are based on simple psychological techniques that work extremely well after a breakup. It’s not some mind tricks and cheap gimmicks that you will use to trick your ex into getting back together. If you are planning to trick your ex or force them into being with you, you are just going to end up in another miserable breakup. This guide will teach you how to start a new relationship with your ex; a relationship that actually has a chance of being a long lasting healthy relationship. Not the same old one which ended in this breakup.
Right now you may not believe that all these can push your girlfriend further away and cancel out your chances of getting her back. What can actually help you will seem meaningless, but it is a mistake to think so. There are entire methodologies created to explain female psychology! In this book you will learn the steps you can take to get your girlfriend to become agreeable and pleasant. She will unlikely be able to resist you. It is just the way women are built.
Commit to having a better relationship. If your ex-boyfriend takes you back, you both need to take steps to make sure that the same problems that caused your last breakup will not interfere with your relationship again. Talk to each other about what kinds of conflicts you have had in the past and how you could deal with them more appropriately going forward.[9]
I apologized for being very hard on him and demanding. And of course there were a few times when we got together to have sex. But things were getting too difficult because i still had incredibly strong feelings. all the while I got the impression that he was distancing himself from me. So I decided for my own sanity that I would keep my distance I asked him to do the same and that we would not contact each other for as long as it took. Reading this article has made me realize that I have made quite a few mistakes and that keeping my distance throughout would’ve been the most beneficial to our potential relationship. I also understand the importance of sex. but sex has never been an issue for us. yet I feel that by making myself so available to him I somehow devalued myself and spoiled our chances at reunification. I know he has other lovers. It’s not that fact that bothers me but the fact that he claims to no longer be in love me. And I guess what bothers me even more is that I am not able to let go. This may have to do with the fact that every time I asked about us all he would ever say was that he can’t give me an answer. After two months of silence I decided to travel home for the holidays for a month and asked to see him before I go. We had a wonderful time and that left me feeling positive. i spent the holidays with my family but thought of him often. We had limited text and email communication during my one month away and i returned from my holidays only to find that I was missing him more than ever. So I got in touch with him. He seemed a bit reluctant to meet right away but I like the poor sap that I am was insistent. i had questions for him but I disnt want to address them in an email. In all honesty my intention to meet that evening was to talk about our situation. I wanted to know how he was feeling what he was up to, progress reports et cetera. What I didn’t expect was to start asking him questions about his lovers. It turns out he’s had a few which is understandable given he’s an incredibly sexual person. Interestingly this information didn’t bother me what really bothered me was that he told me once again that he was no longer in love with me. But getting to that information was quite difficult. He skirted around the issue again saying that he doesn’t know what tomorrow will bring and that I’m a very important person in his life. Clearly he’s not ready to let go even if he doesnt want anything from me. I on the other hand am still very much in love with him and given that our relationship went deeper than any before. Granted we had our issues and we didn’t really make much of an effort to make things work. But both of us are really trying to fundamentally change. Of course as usual I could not resist him I had been fantasizing about him for months and so I invited him home and he did not refuse And here I am two days later not so much feeling regret as realizing that this is a lost cause. I feel more and more like I’ve made all the mistakes One could possibly make in such a situation. But the most fundamental mistake of all is that deep down I have little respect and love for myself. Most of the time I’m okay with myself but in this particular situation with this particular man I seem to somehow lose myself it’s almost as though I lose my identity but I really think that it’s just a matter of being truly in love with him. I don’t know which direction to go with this. I sometimes think that the only solution for me is to find someone else so i can really put him behind me. The only problem is I have no desire to be with anyone else. I know that what we had when it was working was unlike anything either of us has experienced. And it’s interesting that the breakup inspired us to change in so many ways. I do hope sometime in the future that I will be with him as a new woman and he as a new man. I believe That people can fundamentally change if they really want to. But the price we pay to grow is high.
In the dating world, before a guy asks a woman to go out with him, he knows he has to give her a reason to say yes. He has to give her some attention, show her he is interested in her, behave like someone she might like to be with. If a woman wants a man to ask her out, she has to give him a reason to ask by showing interest in him. And if she does the asking, she has to give him a reason to say yes. This principle also applies in marriage, especially when the relationship is in trouble. That person may be your spouse, but that isn’t enough of a reason for him/her to want to be around you. In a perfect world it might be. But in this imperfect world everyone needs help from their spouse to maintain attraction and interest.
What if he changed his number but you’ve totally stayed away and haven’t emailed him since June but are good friends with his sister who really likes you and is currently barely speaking to him due to mistakes he made with her ..(which by the way he hates that I’m friends with her and wanted me to cut her off )- Something I refuse to cut her off bc she’s genuinely my friend and I care about her and she’s been good to me in the mix of this nightmare )
My relationship with my ex boyfriend, wasn’t perfect but we made it work for nearly 2 years. He’s ex came back into his life and was complaining to him about her life, making is seem like everyone hates her and that she was thinking about killing herself. He felt sorry for her and they started talking and that led to him having feelings for her again. He told him that he was having feelings for her and then we started talking about us and I ended up telling him that we were expecting, I kinda didn’t want to tell him, but I did. At first he was kinda excited and then he told her and she “nearly” killed herself over that and then he freaked out on me and left. I was/am scared of my child growing up without their father, I grow up with parents hating each other and only got to see my dad every once in awhile. I don’t want that for my child and he knows that and agrees, but yet he left. Anyways, I turned to Dr. Alex for help and he has helped me. All you have to do is believe in his work and trust that he will help you through a break up and bring your ex back if its meant to be. You can reach him through his website above. He can help you with just about anything.
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It happens all the time, people lose their girlfriends and they want them back, but it doesn’t happen. The reason why it doesn’t happen, is because you don’t know the tips and tricks that actually work. If you want to get an ex back, there are some things that you need to consider. The following are the best tips that you can take with you today to ensure that you’re going to get the upper hand in your life. These take time, so don’t think that you’re going to get through with this overnight. Take your time, gain some confidence and hit these notes in getting your ex girlfriend back.
So my ex boyfriend and I were together for a year and 4 months. Honestly he was obsessed and so was I but i became too comfortable. He was my world and I never thought he would leave me. He would always chase after me and showering me with love and it made me the happiest person alive. One day he got tired of fighting with me and he dumped. told me he didnt want me anymore. I looked like a fool, i begged i cried i ran after him but he just walked away with his head up. it was so painfully. he blocked me on everything so i dont have contact but if i text him he will usually unblock to read my messages. it hurts so bad and as messed up as it is i still want him. I want him back so badly it kills.
I pray my lord and savior and through your son Jesus who died for me. I pray that I may have another chance to make my relationship work with James as I have offended and mistrust him for no known reason. May I have peace and leave our relationship in your hands . If his heart is not mine .may you give him the eyes to see my deep love and the real passion I have for him and i pray that you will give him the open eyes and heart to know me and the real love we can share with your blessings Father..Please open the doors again for reconciliation and that we may work on trying to be good to one another I ask and I pray in Jesus name , Amen.
I still obsess (2 months) about the relationship. I miss being a part of a family, I miss having dinner with him, the sex was mindblowing, sleeping next to him, the lazy weekends and the busy doing things together weekends, waiting for him to come home from work, I miss “our” home, his daughters, his family, Sunday afternoon cookouts at his moms…. I still have the most horrible days when I believe it was all my fault and I was just not good enough and will never be good enough for anyone. I let him do that to me. And yes, I sometimes want that back, him back… Yet, somehow I know that, eventually I will be ok, better than ever. Wish it would get here faster!
My boyfriend and I have been together for about five years. In December we got into an argument because I thought he was ignoring my plans I had with my family. We normally see family together during the holidays so I expected him to be on point. Anyway, I was about to leave and asked him what’s on his agenda and he just ignored me. I got mad and cursed him out and left. Days after I text to find out why he was ignoring me and he did not reply. Some time passed and he then said we need some space because I constantly curse him out and he is tired of it. He said that I am jealous and insecure which is a recurring theme in our arguments. Weeks passed and we just cordial over the phone. I tried not to be clingy because he said that we have to learn to be friends and give each other space in order to try and repair the relationship. He visited me in January and we talked somewhat and ended up sleeping together. We were cordial for a couple days and he kept saying how much he loves me and wants to have a family with me. I then asked if that means that we are back together and he said we never broke up but we still need space. Some time passed and we kept sending each other messages and stuff. I really missed him and asked when are we going to be out of this phase and he said as long as it takes for me to fix my ways. I told him that he has things to work on too. He said he knows he is not perfect but we keep fighting over the same things and he is tired of it. Recently he came to see me and brought an unexpected gift. I thought he was going to stay but he did not. I wanted him so badly that I slept with him. A few days after I asked about seeing him for Valentines Day and he said “why did we break up again?” I said “You said we were not broken up” He said that we still need space. I said I was confused because he keeps sending me messages about missing me and wanting to be with me and we are intimate but yet we are “just friends for now”. Mind you, when we text it is not about anything sexual. If he sees where a conversation is headed that way he stops it. Now we got into a huge fight over the phone because I said I do not know what he wants from me and I am fed up of waiting. He said talking to me is pointless because I do not get where he is coming from. I told him that he does not get where I am coming from either and I will just leave him alone. He said that he does not give a f#$% and that I should do what I want to because he is not getting through to me. I try to understand him honestly I do but I do not think he sees it. I love him with all my heart but I fear this is it for us. Sigh. Any advice?
If you don’t normally do the cleaning, dust a room or two. (Here’s a hint for you guys: Don’t say, “I thought I would help you out.” Women tend to think of housework as a shared responsibility since you live there, too. If you lived there alone, you would clean the place. “Helping” her means you think it’s her job. You may have a clear delineation of roles in your family where she does the cleaning, but it’s better if you have a good reason she will appreciate other than “helping.”)
We women tend to think that giving and giving to a man will bring him closer. And this includes doing things like checking up on him to see how he’s doing. It’s what I call “overfunctioning.” Don’t do it! A man is accustomed to valuing what he has to work for, so if you put in effort and make it easy for him, he will actually value you less. We work hard because we think that if we don’t he’ll assume we don’t care enough about him, and he’ll go away. But this is simply untrue. If you lean back and let go of the reigns, you give your boyfriend the chance to see what it feels like to be without you, and if he’s worth it you will get your boyfriend back. Remember this: men commit to you not because they want to be with a woman, but because they can’t stand to be WITHOUT you. Let him feel what it’s like NOT to have you in his life.
Yes, I felt free in a way but totally sad ’cause I did wanna hang or talk or something, but he’s been a jerk for ignoring so long. I need to respect myself, but I want him back too. I haven’t blocked him from WhatsApp or Facebook, don’t plan to really, and I haven’t talked to him, but I really miss him. Should I just stand my ground and not reach out to him? I feel like this is the right thing to do and perhaps try to move on, but I love him. Thank you so much for your help and time, it means the world to me, well, to all of us.
Seriously?? That’s actually what I was kinda thinking!my girlfriend left me last November and i really want her back still!!she blocked me on facebook not long ago it couldn’t of been but maybe a few days if that!until I noticed I wasn’t blocked anymore!i only message her about once every week or two!i can see that she reads them but I never get a reply!i just know that I was messing up a lot…not cheating but…anyways I also finally started a very good new job I hope this will help?
Me and my bf have been together for 15 yrs.. on Oct 12 I found out my dad is in the hospital. .he doesn’t text or call me all day..so when I get home I was pissed off..thats my dad..he didn’t even bother texting to see how he was..we get to arguing. .and he breaks up with me..wtf..like an idiot I start begging and begging. . No. .plz..and he just gets so angry with me..I have to leave the house. .I can’t afford it. .all wk moving out and work, stressed, heart broken to the max..and I can’t even be with my dad cuz i’m moving out..thats the worst..there were signs I should have picked up on. .like..he was becoming distant. .we had been kinda fighting but we talked about it..and I was really trying to work on the things we talked about. .I’ve been calling, texting. .of course. .I mean hello. .our entire lives are together. .but no answer. .no reply. .today is my birthday. .1 wk to the day we have broken up. .and to be honest I just want to go home..and be with him..at the same time. .we have a lease together. .pets..bank account *which I closed out yesterday* I opened my own..the utilities are in my name..I mean..I have to protect my name right. .at the same time I want to wait and see..ugh!!! He has broken up with me before. .maybe 5, 6 yrs ago..and he basically said he had hit rock bottom. .and blah blah blah..what am I supposed to do? No contact? While I was reading the article some things for sure stood out to me..I need to change myself. .not for him.. for me..I have become lazy..with my self. .and we were kinda on auto pilot. .but thats how life is no? We still did fun things..just not as often..we’re adults..with bills..and responsibilities. .idk..advice? Anyone?

I just hope we get back. We talk but not as much. Look depressed in class when he don’t talk to me. I want to change myself. He’s the only thing that makes my day. God please let everything work. Everyone please pray for me that get him back. Tomorrow I’m actually going to talk to him. Go please let this conversation go well tomorrow, I don’t want to bring up the past, I want to work on the future with him. Please GOD, I’m begging you please god let everything go well between us. I never I want to make the same mistake ever. I know I might be 13 but you can found love at any age. And just because y’all say I love you doesn’t prove anything, you have to show that person how much you love them. And that’s what I have to do. But lady’s out their, if are reading this y’all both have to comment to what y’all say. Keeping a promise is one. I lost someone that was important to me, now I’m trying to get this person back. But I’m not getting in his face I’m backing up a little
Through marital or couple therapy, the counsellor can help the couple increase effective communication skills, assist in looking at each other’s perspective, discuss what makes a relationship work and what a healthy relationship looks like, help identify specific problems and dynamics of the relationship, understand gridlocked conflicts, and help establish interventions and strategies that will help strengthen conflict management skills.
Apologize. Think deeply about anything you did or didn't do that somehow contributed to the downfall of the relationship, and clean the slate by giving your ex a proper apology. Take full responsibility for the offense, without blaming your ex, giving excuses, or expecting an apology (or even forgiveness) in return. It may very well be that your ex contributed to the situation, but you cannot apologize for someone else; you can only apologize for yourself. Leave him or her out of it and odds are the apology will be reciprocated.
My girlfriend told me she did not love me the same way she used to. That I was more of a best friend type of love… She has new friends that go out alot and she also started to drink socially.. Im not sure this is a cry for independence or because her parents do not a good relationship . So i wondered if she imprinted her dads action on to me as I would treat her as he treats her and her mom….. I tried telling her I could do things differently and so on but she starts med school soon and I am not sure if she wants to be independent or what… I have not texted her and deleted my own facebook to avoid contact. She didnt cheat, we didnt end on a argument. I was the one who said okay goodbye. And thats the last time I talked to her ( 2 weeks ago). Any ideas on what i should do? 

So now, there’s not a moment that goes by when I don’t think about him and how I want him to come back so I can be better, do better say the things I was too shy to say. I’m not the only person who needs to change, he needs to come back as a new person too. But truth be told, it seemed that we were both stepping out of our comfort zones to be with each other. I wanted him to be more patient and he wanted me to profess my love for him everyday and in the end we both felt like we were being cheated of something and that the other person was being selfish.
My boyfriend just broke up with me a week ago. We had been dating about 4 months. The first two months of our relationship, he worked a normal 9-5 job and we were able to see each other once, twice, or even more times a week. In December he went back to working a completely opposite shift as me, and six days a week, meaning that we had very little time to see each other. Only about once every week to two weeks. We talked about how difficult it was to see each other because of his work schedule, but that he really cared about me and was going to try to make it work because it meant something to him. The next time I saw him three weeks later, he said that he didn’t think he would be able to commit the time to the relationship. It wasn’t that he didn’t care about me, or enjoy my company, but that he couldn’t see me very often and when he had time off on the weekends, there were other things that he needed to do because he could only do them then. He said that it didn’t mean he wouldn’t be interested in taking me out every couples of weeks or so, but that it wouldn’t be anything more than a date, not a relationship. He also said that it had nothing to do with anything that I did, that he always had a great time with me (we never got into any fights or arguments), and the breakup wasn’t anything he particularly wanted to do, but he knew that I wanted more than he could give me. He mentioned that if his schedule changed in the somewhat near future, or if his feelings towards committing to a relationship changed, I would be the first one to know. I really feel like we’re right together, and he said that he thought we were good together, and I could honestly see myself with him for the long haul. How long should I wait before I contact him? We had talked everyday for the past 3 months, and now nothing. He’s leaving for a 3 week long business trip in April. Should I contact him and try to see him before he leaves, or wait until he gets back? I would be willing to have a relationship with him even if it meant not seeing him very often, as long as I knew we would be serious once he got back on a different schedule. I’m pretty upset and hurt about it, and any advice would be helpful. Thanks!

Me and my girl have two kids together she left me because I was too controlling. She left me 3 months ago. She lives with a friend that’s a girl about 100 miles away from me.Before she left I accused her of cheating a lot she was tired of it and left. For two months I bothered her trying to get her back. I’m her first love and her first boyfriend. When we last spoke she said she hates me and wished I was dead. If she didn’t care about me than why is she still responding when I talk to her? I know she still loves me and she knows I still love her. Everytime I’m positive with her she knocks me down yelling, cussing, or threatening to take my kids away forever. She thinks if we get back together I will an ass again. She cries sometimes when we talk over the phone. Do I have a chance of getting her back? And How? We been together for 6 years
My ex ended it just a couple of days ago, we were fighting over stupid things and we just struggled to compromise with each other. He says he just doesn’t want to be in a relationship anymore, but I miss and love him Sooo much! We used to have fights were we almost broke up but it was then fine, so I’m struggling with this because all the other times it was okay because we knew how much we loved each other. But the times we fought were mostly over text because we only got to see each other once or twice a week so, so much of our communication was over text. But when we were together it was perfect and we were so in love. I’m just struggling so much right now I just don’t know what to do. I know everyone keeps saying you just need time and then see how it is but it’s just soooo hard. all I want to do is talk to him! We have ended on good term atm cos we agreed to be friends. I don’t know if I should still have hope we could be together again or I should just move on!
If you have the sinking feeling that your relationship is on the rocks, then it's time to reflect on your relationship and try to save it. To save it, you're going to need to work together to figure out the problem or problems you're having, as well as a solution to those problems. You're also going to need to work at loving each other again and reconnecting to what you felt in the past.
You get the Save The Marriage System,  the bonus audios, a bonus set of rules for fair fighting, and a complete bonus ebook!  If I haven’t managed to convince you by now, it is time for me to give up! If this is not right for you, then please, move on. But, if you are really ready to take action, I can give you the tools you need! Please, take action and Save Your Marriage
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