I love this girl and my dad made me break up with her I didn’t want it but I had to ,so when I did break up with her, I didn’t talk to her for about a month because I would never hurt a girl so what I thought was not to talked to her for a monthbut I was wrong I made things worse its been a year now I did that 2 weeks things still nothing she’s in love with another boy but I still think she loves me because she used to be way in love with me but it is what it is I guess.
Thanks so much for this. I broke up with my boyfriend and want him back. We just kept arguing i was jealous.. he said he only had eyes for me me and i was the love of his life. It has hurt him so much i know.. but im so willing to change.. i followed your tips i look great, have fun and he still looks at me like i am the one but says sex with no emotional strings is how he wants to do it for now as he is still hurting and probablyv thinks ill do it all again..but i won’t.I hope he comes back totally.. at the moment im working on trying to get him tovstart taking me to his local bar with him again.. we went all the time before. im taking itvslowly anyway. I never want to hurt him again
When people explain to me why they stay in unsatisfactory relationships long past the point where family and friends and everyone else encourage them to leave, they often say, “I love him/her.” I know that that is the real reason. Love has evolved as a powerful device to keep people together despite any defect or deficiency of a partner. Nature requires them to stay together long enough to have children. But it is not a good reason. As more or less rational animals, we can make decisions that promote our own individual interests. People who are capable of falling in love once can fall in love again and again if that first relationship breaks apart. The issue each person has to decide in the midst of a bad marriage or a bad affair is whether it is possible to be happy in that relationship—and, really, whether it is possible to be happier with someone else. Unfortunately, the alternative that occurs to many is not another partner, it is loneliness.
Hi my boyfriend always use to talk with for a couple of days later he will fight and we wont be in contact for 3-6 months after thathe will msg me and he will b normal as before and again he will fight and wont b in contact for 3-6 months this is go on repeating from 3 years i cant understand whether he loves me or hates me but i love him so much just suggest me how to make him mine completely
MY EX and i broke up a week ago. I want him back. I believe we were good together. But we work together, any advice on how to deal with that? He explained why. He cared about me alot and didn’t want to risk hurting me because ehe was going through something. That he needed to be alone. I told him I was willing to be there and wait for him that wasn’t a good reason to end things. He said no I shouldn’t we went back and forth. At some point we broke up. But I said I’m waiting for him for a while. We were both crying. He told me if I’m still around and he was better we could try again. I just feel my heart is missing a piece
My boyfriend left me 2 weeks ago ;( evrything was absolutely amazing and perfect. I love him and his little girl so much and i feel heartbroken. We had 8 mounths relationship in witch we lived together….I think i was a bit jelous of his ex, the mother of his daughter, witch i regret now ;( but is it too late? I think he loves me, despite when he left me he said he doesn’t want a relationship and he doesn’t love me the same way i do. Is it possible to tell me all this just to make me go away, or to protect me, or I really dunno….and that’s killing me…. I haven’t slept proparly, i haven’t eaten proparly, i hate my job ( and I think that was one of the reasons we start having problems, cause i was really moody ) and i just want him back. PLEASE, i need help, i am so confused and hurted. .. If anybody have any advice i am happy to listen
A little bit about us..he has always felt i was too good for him, even though i never felt that way. His friends had even said i was too good for him and they didnt know what i saw in him. He used to think i was going to leave him as soon as i finished up this accelerated program I was in and got a job, because according to him i wouldn’t need him anymore. Which i didn’t do, because I got a job and was still fighting for our relationship. So when he said he needed more space i decided to leave the state and head home to spend time with my family for a month. During this time I was posting a lot on social media that I was having all this fun blah blah blah and making sure to look extra good in all my pictures, all so he would miss me. On all my stories he was always the first to look which made me think perfect he does still care. So, when i got back i reached out to see if he was ready and i told him how much i missed him too. It took him about 2 days to get back to me in which he said i cant do it thru text. I messaged back telling him how much i loved him blah blah and he said that i spiked his anxiety and to leave him alone. He said i never cared about him and i only ever loved him for the convenience of what he would do for me. And i was using him and he was just a butler to me. This broke me. So much. I cant even describe how Ive been feeling lately. Truth is, i think him seeing me have all that fun without him hurt him. I think he still does care. We have been a couple that has spent the majority of our relationship together or in close communication. He drunkenly called me the love of his life to his friends a few weeks before the fight happened. I haven’t been the best at talking about my feelings to him, it took me 7 months to even tell him i love him.
my boyfriend and i broke up like 5 days ago . i still cant accept it. the reason he broke up with me is because he thought i was rushing things . we were only going out for 4 weeks. if i wanted to hold his hand he would consider that rushing ? i honestly think that is he thought i was “rushing” he could have had communtication with me and told me instead of breaking up . aside from that whole experiance , i felt like i didnt know him as well . we went from barly talking to going out in less than a week. we both liked eachother very much though. what im going to do is change myself. not only to get him back , but for all the other assh*les who dumped me. i wanna be that girl that walks passed them and their like dayuummm we should get back together . at the end of it all i just want him to know how lonley hes gunna feel without me by his side. i honestly thought he was gunna be my longest relationship (my longest relationship has been only a month). and also yesterday , i poured my heart out to him and wrote him a hugeeeeeee text . his response was “aww thanks thats sweet (: ” i dont think he actually took in all the emotion and feelings and time it took me to write all that. one thing i hate now is that i try to be mad at him and i cant. i have to see his face eveeeryday and it would hurt me alot. im gunna have to live with this . #girlsgetf*ckedovereasy
My husband and I got married 4 years ago. We don’t have kids, so we’re enjoying the company of each other. All of the sudden, he changed. He kept on telling lies and he even told his brother that he has another woman. Proud one huh??! He broke up with the me that easy last January, I never granted his wish of breaking up coz hello! we’re not just lovers, we’re married couple! He even yelled at me when I visited him in his office once. I got really depressed and cried my heart out. Now, I just read about your articles and i wanted to try this.. I hope it’s going to work… :-) I’ll keep updates..

There were a few problems in the past. He’s very sensitive and when he gets stressed he can’t handle much emotion. Because of this, he “broke up” with me in the past. It wasn’t really a break up, he kind of just stopped talking to me. It only took one or two days for him to reach out. He said that he was so sorry and that he was so devastated when he didn’t talk to me. He said that he couldn’t see himself with anyone else and the “break up” made him sick. I thought that this time was going to be like those in the past but after a few days he was still being cold. It’s been about two and a half weeks now since he broke up with me and a week since the last time we talked.


I met a girl in my work place and we became good friends…she had a bf from college but she was not in good terms with him I mean he had a ex gf and he was nbreaking u. With her and she. Was not sure of him..I asked her to breakup rather than taking it this far..with no intention of us being committed.. Later we became close and got into a relationship known only to my friends and her ex.. After 8-9 months of things going peaceful it started to take a violent turn she still used to talk to her ex sometimes bt later it was on a regular basis now she brokeup with me and is back wit. Him… I am shattered what to do????
Hello Sergio, after I read your book I began working on myself and my life is changing quite a bit. There's a lot of positive news! I now know that I will succeed! I did a lot to help minimize the damage of my personal crisis and was able to help 2 friends who were in similar situations. One of my friends broke up with his girlfriend year ago, the other half year ago. I won't go into details about their girlfriends, but will say that the women have gotten my friends to a point where one started to drink heavily, and the other using drugs. Thankfully, I was able to help them! First of all, I wrote 3 “magic letters”, which worked like a magnet first on my girlfriend, and then on the girlfriends of my friends. I don’t know why it took 3 letters, but that’s the fact. The effect from these letters was like a nuclear bomb, or a knockout in boxing – our women still don’t know what hit them. We only changed the names of the girlfriends and some small details in the letters, but the effect was exactly the same on all of them!!! They were very surprised and interested in us again. They also corrected a lot of their negative behavior. I first tried this technique out on my girlfriend, then, helped one of my friends. The third didn’t want to believe that something so simple could work, but now he’s a true follower!

You may worry about the old adage, “Out of sight, out of mind,” and use that as a justification to reach out. The thought of him moving on and forgetting about you is too terrifying to bear. One little text won’t hurt, you reason. But, in this instance, it will hurt. If you want your ex back, it is important that you strictly adhere to the no contact rule.


Hello Sergio, after I read your book I began working on myself and my life is changing quite a bit. There's a lot of positive news! I now know that I will succeed! I did a lot to help minimize the damage of my personal crisis and was able to help 2 friends who were in similar situations. One of my friends broke up with his girlfriend year ago, the other half year ago. I won't go into details about their girlfriends, but will say that the women have gotten my friends to a point where one started to drink heavily, and the other using drugs. Thankfully, I was able to help them! First of all, I wrote 3 “magic letters”, which worked like a magnet first on my girlfriend, and then on the girlfriends of my friends. I don’t know why it took 3 letters, but that’s the fact. The effect from these letters was like a nuclear bomb, or a knockout in boxing – our women still don’t know what hit them. We only changed the names of the girlfriends and some small details in the letters, but the effect was exactly the same on all of them!!! They were very surprised and interested in us again. They also corrected a lot of their negative behavior. I first tried this technique out on my girlfriend, then, helped one of my friends. The third didn’t want to believe that something so simple could work, but now he’s a true follower!
Got a text from my GF immediately returning from a vacation together. She said she didn’t feel as invested in our relationship as I did. We’d been dating 2 and a half months, extremely attracted to each other, the sex was incredible for the both of us, & we spent a good bit of time together. Within the first month, she was talking about settling down & getting a place together. Admittedly, I was a little taken back by it, but handled it appropriately. Obviously it showed she had been rather interested in me and then some. The breakup happened via text as I said before & about not being as invested in me as I was with her. Not even a week later, she’s already texting me & admittedly I respond, but it’s usually silly stuff. I want to be back with her in the worst way but can’t get a good read on what the hell happened or what’s happening? Any recommendations on how to proceed? Thanks.
He ended things.. This is a guy who comes back to me and has my number for 5 years. And we were so intimate and shared our past. He said didn’t want to play games this time. He came 4 hrs back and forth to spend time with me. Pursues me. Why? What does he want? Why travel in total 8 hrs to come have sex with me? He like a egotistical narcissistic unemotional prick. Please advice.. Btw I never responded to his message. I left things.

So my boyfriend broke up with me two weeks before Christmas and I’ve tryed everything to get him back. It looks like its hopeless even though we are really good friends now and he seems into me again. I just don’t know if I should see if he really ever liked me or if he still does. We’ve been together before, although it took a year and a half to get back together. I’m wondering of the spark is still there!
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Tell her in person. Set a time to meet in a public place, or a place that you know she'll feel comfortable in. When the time is right, say: "I know I made some mistakes during our relationship, and I wanted to take full responsibility for those. I shouldn't have done [whatever it is you did] to you, and I feel horrible now. But the biggest mistake I made was losing you. I don't expect anything from you, I just want you to know that."
God please help me, i am asking you to please help me save my relationship.my best friend and i had a fallout and are not on good terms. I truly want this relationship to work out. I love spending time with him and we have so much fun together. Things were going so well n then we had a fight today. God please help me help him see that im a good girl and that wr can be happy together. God please i need him in my life. Please help him to see me for the good and forgive me for our past issues. I am so heart broken right now. Gos please save us. Please give me the opportunity to talk this out with him and make everything okay. Please god. Dont let him give up on me
For example, a boy comes to you in a bar and offers you to buy a drink. What will be your response? Most probably you would not value his friendship that much because you didn’t work for it. You may though of saying ‘YES’ to him but very next moment after buying drink you wouldn’t be giving any attention to him. Why?  This is because you didn’t work for it.

I need advice. We met on match.com and only dated about 3 weeks but had a great connection from the very beginning. Plus we share a lot in common (we agree about a lot, graduated high school same year, kids are same age). But he broke it off because 1) we moved too fast (didn’t have sex but went further than we intended by date 2) and 2) we’re in different places in our lives – I’m going through a divorce and he’s been divorced for years. I’m devastated. We ended things amicably last week (I didn’t fight it, though I wanted to) and we haven’t been in contact. But he’s been back on match.com already. My question is, what are our chances for trying again in the future? Did moving too fast derail us completely?
I have been dating this guy he lives abit far from me I went to see him he lies to me he were have gf already but never had sex with her when we first met we was so attractive to each other then up having sex was like we were falling we almost sleep together for 11 time but he borak up with his gf but now his pull away from me too as he knows that I really liked him I’m so confuse don’t no what to do he said he has to go his different ways I’m So lost cos I fall in love him and I don’t no about him it’s seem like he hasn’t get over his ex
Don't try to save a relationship that's toxic or abusive. There's really no way to work on a relationship that's based on toxic patterns or abuse. No amount of working on communication techniques or trying to reignite the romance is going to make things better long-term. You may feel that you're getting something out of the relationship, but you have a lot more to gain by being free. 

We women tend to think that giving and giving to a man will bring him closer. And this includes doing things like checking up on him to see how he’s doing. It’s what I call “overfunctioning.” Don’t do it! A man is accustomed to valuing what he has to work for, so if you put in effort and make it easy for him, he will actually value you less. We work hard because we think that if we don’t he’ll assume we don’t care enough about him, and he’ll go away. But this is simply untrue. If you lean back and let go of the reigns, you give your boyfriend the chance to see what it feels like to be without you, and if he’s worth it you will get your boyfriend back. Remember this: men commit to you not because they want to be with a woman, but because they can’t stand to be WITHOUT you. Let him feel what it’s like NOT to have you in his life.
Pursue your passion. Most of us may struggle to say what our passion in life is. We are too bogged down in our obligations, responsibilities, and routines to carve out any time to give some thought to the things we are passionate about. Your time of no contact is as good a time as any to figure it out. Maybe you’ve always had a love for good art. Maybe you are excited about gardening or writing. Take this time to do those things Also, take this time to try something new. You might just find a passion for something you didn’t know you had before. Engaging in the activities and hobbies that we love, that we are good at, and that we are passionate about go a long way to remind us of our essence and make us feel alive again.
Let him see it, but don't say it. Tell him you had a great time, and that you could meet up some time to hang out… he will feel like his leg was chopped of for not kissing, but he will know that you want more, that there might be a new, bright future for the two of you. All night he'll be flipping around in bed, thinking about how beautiful you are and how much he wants to get back with you. I'm not saying you should be ice-cold when you meet up, on the contrary, be cold, but a bit mysterious, make him wonder.
Hi. I dated this guy last year , but unfortunately it didn’t work out between us cause I was unreachable and shy. We pretty much texted the whole time and met a few times. I fell for him and he said he had feelings for me too . But all of a sudden he wanted to be just friends. We had 5 months long an emotional relationship/friendship and 5 months a non-emotional one. I kinda acted out there. He started giving me less atttetion day after day and we started fighting every now and then and I got super jealous when he talked about this other girl he liked. Eventually he called the friendship off. I asked him to block my number and social accounts so we wouldn’t have contact . It’s been 4 months now and I miss him everyday. I’m madly in love with him . Haven’t heard of him for 4 months and I want him back. I can’t get over him being gone from my life. Please help. What should I do ? Why am I feeling this way.
He broke up with me first: he said that it was because he felt like we didn’t have a future together, that it felt impossible that i learned the language ( which i was doing), that I was asking for too much of his time, that he didn’t feel like he could do all the things he wanted with his friends. but I couldn’t accept it, I wanted to fight for the love we had, so much, I negociated, I asked for more time, I begged, I told him that if he still loved me it would be worth it. after a day of speaking he said ok. A week after I asked him again ( because I was afraid and I had been walking on eggshells all week), he said that he still had that feeling that we wouldn’t be together forever, but he told me he loved me and he really wanted to work for it, to work on it and make it work! ( i was so happy!)
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