What i would do to get my ex back is just let him know i care and i have done that.My friend has a class with him and says he talks to his friends bout me all the time.She says its all good things and about how good life was when we were dating.I just wish i had him back, and all my friends say he still has feelings for me.How do i find out if he really likes me without letting him know i like him?
He ended things.. This is a guy who comes back to me and has my number for 5 years. And we were so intimate and shared our past. He said didn’t want to play games this time. He came 4 hrs back and forth to spend time with me. Pursues me. Why? What does he want? Why travel in total 8 hrs to come have sex with me? He like a egotistical narcissistic unemotional prick. Please advice.. Btw I never responded to his message. I left things.
If you’re already involved in a platonic friendship with your ex-girlfriend, you can turn the situation around. They key thing to do is to start to pull away. You want your ex to get the sense that she is losing her hold on you and you could be starting to move on without her. Right now she is counting on your friendship and hasn’t considered the possibility that you wouldn’t be a part of her life. There are specific actions you can take at this time to make a romance more appealing. Get her to see you as a potential partner again, and her feelings towards you will soon change.
My heart is shattered. I met a guy who I knew from school. We finally met up 10 years later and decided to see where things would go. After about 3 months or so, Out of the blue on a Sunday afternoon he arrived at my house and said that things weren’t going anywhere and nothing as developed . We are jut friends really than anything else. I accepted it gracefully and thanked him for everything. The following Thursday i messaged him to tell him that I have accepted everything, thanked him for everything once again and wished him well for for his flying (Hes a pilot) He replied saying he was sorry for how things turned out as i was always sweet and very kind and wished me all the best. Im trying really hard to understand what he meant when he just ended things like that out if the blue. I even saw him on a dating site and was active. I havent contacted him ever since and have decided to go off facebook for a while as i keep. catching myself checking his profile. its been over a week since the break up. Do you think theres a chance he might actually contact me ever again,?feels as though hes iced me out and doesnt really care.
The reason you must answer these questions to yourself is so that you can determine a couple of things. First, do you really want to get him back, will you be happy or are you just lonely right now, but deep inside you know that it probably won't work out if you get back together? You must believe that things will work out between the two of you and that you can be happy together again. Otherwise, if you don't have total belief in this relationship, then it's not worth trying to get him back.

My girl is my love. She is my best friend only, one I trust and believe so much. I always give everything she wants or ask me and she enjoyed to spend time with me a lot for shopping, dining, etc. She still loves me for being honest and supportive in her life. She think me of her family only. But her heart still want another guy. It make me felt stupid, jealous and I worry that she will use me for him and her. I give so much to her , she knew me regret and stupid, so she worry I always change mind. She angry and argue with me on 3 times, she want to break up with me, because she suddnelly ask me about him, and I also asked her about her love on him. It make her really ANGRY on me because I never trust in her. I am stupid to help her so much, she never give back to me. She knows I loves her, but she cannot be with me together, she likes me but she loves him so much than me. It make me hurt so deeply. She begs me dont leave at her side cus she dont have many friends. But I cant, but she angry and want to break up with me! So, how I get her think of me, how I make her forget another guy? How make she leave him? She is very degil, and wont listen my advices. Please help me.
If you show her that you’re sad, you’re proving that you cared about her. If she sees you cry, she’ll know that leaving you had an effect on you. She wants to know that she was cared for even if she’s not interested in being with you right now. This proves that you weren’t just a waste of her time and that you were just as invested in the relationship as she was.
Need some advice here, my ex girlfriend/ girlfriend just broke it off after a night at the bar. The night started out with a romantic dinner and then we met her friends out at the bar.. We both had a great night until after bar close when we were trying to decide on what we were going to all do the rest of the night.. We ended up getting in an argument about something, to be honest I don’t remember, and she just told me to go home. She proceeded to walk away with her and a few of her guy friends so naturally I got upset. I contemplated on what to do and them decided to walk to her place.. That was obviously not a good decision, when I got there I got upset and accused her of not wanting to be with me and she went on to say that I followed her he and was stalking her which was not my intent at all.. After going back and forth I just flat out asked if we were over and if she even wanted to be with me and she responded no I don’t want to be. I then immediately started to try and plead with her and ask her why and kept trying to get her to talk to me about it and all she did was tell me to leave and go home, which I did after waiting for a cab for an hour.. On the way home in the cab I was so damn upset and sent her a text message that she didn’t care about me and that I was easily replaced by by one of her guy friends that was at her place with everyone.. She responded with what r u talking about and I then responded with I know your sleeping with him I could tell how lit up your face was when you looked at him and then told her one more time that she was going to sleep with him.. She responded back by saying she wasn’t and that I’m crazy. About a half hour goes by and she text me back that she misses me and said that she was getting a cab to come over.. So she came over and apologized for being a brat and apologized for the night.. I then asked her why she got so mad and she said she didn’t remember.. So I let it be figured we would talk in the morning about it, so we had sex and went to bed. The next morning comes and I try to talk to her and she said she didn’t want to talk about it so I did what I shouldn’t have and prayed at her a little bit to get her to talk and she flipped out and said I just want to go home so asked her again do you even want to be with me and she said I don’t know. I brought her home and when I dropped her off I asked if I could have a kiss and we kissed and she said ill talk to you later.. She finally got back to me 14 hrs later and said that she didn’t feel good and had been sleeping all day which I guess I can understand after a full night of drinking.. I did send her a text and left her a voicemail saying how torn up and confused I am about everything but didn’t say it in a demanding way at all.. The next day I sent her another message in the afternoon asking her if she would have time to talk in person and she said yea.. Being absolutely heartbroken at this point I decided to make her a huge bouquet of flower along with a handwritten card apologizing for everything that happened.. I brought them over to her place and she was still sleeping saying she didn’t feel good so I just dropped th off and we agreed to talk tomarow about things.. I’m just so confused right now, I know we have only been seeing each other for 2 months but I don’t understand how things coul end like they did I have been in this 100%and treat her like an absolute queen.. What should I so here I don’t want to loose this girl she is absolutely one of a kind and I genuinely care for her

I ask you God to please bless me and my kids father’s relationship to be stronger and for him to not leave me and go off to another female or move our if our place together. Please God of I didn’t need you more then any time in my life I need you now .I promise I will not do anything to unsure are relationship I promise I keep my word please God please bless me through our kids please I need you right now God more then anytime time in my life save my relationship with my kids father and make it healthy please In the name of Jesus we do pray AMEN thank God


Okay, so My situation is very different and I’m still in need of some advice (this was VERY helpful though, THANK YOU!). When my ex and I first met, it was through some friends when we went out to a bar. We jumped into a relation just a few weeks after meeting, which I felt was very soon for me. I felt that he and I hadn’t really connected completely and that during the relationship I didn’t know him as well as well as I did previous boyfriends because we weren’t really close before we decided to give the relationship a try, unlike my past relationships where we were friends for at least a month or two before taking the next step. But that’s not the main reason why we broke up. I had trust issues from the past few relationships I had been in. I was cheated on multiple times, led on, and in the most recent relationship before my ex and I, I was left for another girl. I couldn’t really get over all of that and instead of letting it go, I carried that with me and lived in fear of the day that my now ex-boyfriend would do the same. After having a serious talk and explaining that to him, he made it clear that I didn’t trust him, but trust is one of the most important factors in a relationship. He felt that because I didn’t trust him and because I hurt his feelings by telling him how I felt, that he couldn’t trust me. So, we came to a conclusion and decided that since I felt we were’t very close to begin with and since we both felt that we don’t trust each other enough to be in a relationship, that we’d start over as friends and see where we end up. I explained to him that I care about him and that I don’t plan on seeing anyone else unless he finds someone new, that I’m exclusive to him. And he said he was exclusive to me as well. So my question is, how do I earn his trust back? I’m ready to be with him again, I’m not worried about him hurting me anymore like my exes did before and I have no doubts about weather or not I’d be able to make this work on my end. So how do I earn his trust? I plan on spending time with him and taking the advice already given from this article, so what else can I do? I know I need to be patient and I understand that it’s going to be hard since I’m so ready to give this another try. Is there anything else that I need to understand before I really work my ass off to get him back?


You are hilarious!! I am laughing so loudly whilst reading your articles….I’m scaring my dogs! I came across your website while I was googling and trying to understand why my now ex-fiance ‘assbag’ of 4 years breaks up with me (2nd time in 3 months), demands no contact then calls me, bawls during the conversation then tells me “he says he needs space” AGAIN…. he did this 3 months ago also…so now I’m thinking he’s emotionally inept and I’m left feel totally confused. But I am finding your articles are helping me alot….so thank you!!!!

Need some help. Devastated. I was with my girlfriend for 18mths. Moved in together after 10mths. We went on a trip overseas and it was hell. two months later she ended it. She was upset she did it and said she misses me and we kept seeing each other for about a month. Then told me its not happening. She’s fallen outta love. Hurts like hell. She said she did try in that month but its gone for her and that she can’t talk for awhile and needs space. Then, stupidly, I was bored and missing her about 2wks later and sent her text saying that if i was better to her we’d be doing something together right now. She got back to me the day after and wasn’t happy at all. Asked for me to stop contacting her and that she will never love me again. Ouch! I really want her back. Not sure what to do from here. How do i get her back?

My ex broke up with me saying that he just lost himself in the relationship. For the first eight months that we knew each other, I was not ready to dated to a very bad relationship before him, so he continued to pursue me and try to prove that he was different. He was the perfect boyfriend for the almost three years that we were together, and he was also the one who really wanted a commitment and future. We had our entire lives together planned out from the wedding to traveling to kids. We ended up spending all of our time together and not doing anything else with anybody else. Needless to say we smothered each other to the point where we were arguing over stupid things. We had classes together for another month after our breakup which was very hard for me. Initially he was very nice to me and would be willing to talk with me about the breakup any time I was upset. He told me that he just didn’t want to be in a relationship for maybe years to come because he really needed to focus on finding himself. By the end of our relationship, I think we had both lost ourselves, and I do feel like the breakup was necessary in order for us both to get our own identities back. He was very depressed at the end of our relationship, and it was during that last month that things started to fall apart. He started seeing a therapist as well. However, after a few weeks he jumped into something with somebody else (His status still said single) and changed his Facebook profile picture to a picture of the two of them together. He started being very mean to me over text and made it clear that he was very happy. People are saying that he wants a reaction out of me. So, I stopped contacting him. It’s been maybe two weeks, but I blocked him on social media because it was too hard for me to see those things and I didn’t want to make myself crazy. His whole family are still friends with me on Facebook. Everybody seems to think he will be back eventually, but that I need to focus on myself in the meantime. I was wondering if you think blocking him would ruin our chances of getting back together. I’m also afraid that he will be afraid to give things another chance because he’ll be afraid we will fall into old habits. I want him to see that I’m making positive changes and learning from this, but I don’t know how. I’m afraid that by avoiding his problems things are only getting worse for him. I need advice please!!!

I have one for you guys! I started dating this girl that in my mind is the perfect one! I mean I couldnt possibly build a better woman. Well after 4 years of dating we broke up because she was tired of my habbits.!? Well we have been broken up now for three years and she still calls and texts every day. When I go to her house for the night she sleeps in her bed alone. She helps me in any way I need. (Bails me outta jail, pays my phone bill, buys me sweet gifts, ect.)
True intimacy involves self-reflection and transparency, both of which play a role in accountability. Self-reflection occurs when each partner can honestly, without pride, examine their thoughts and behaviors and take ownership for their intentions and possible “wrong-doing.” If one or both members of a couple are incapable of doing this, a marriage cannot move forward in a healthy way.

About a month ago I found out my boyfriend of 4 months has been cheating on me. I was so confused, we have been doing so well and we were really close, I didn’t understand what made him do it. Before we started dating, we were close friends for 3 years, we told each other everything and we used to tell people that we were going to get married some day, at the time it was all a joke, I had no intention of being more then friends but he did. Anyways we got together and it was the best couple of months of my life. Then, I found out he cheated on me, he begged me for forgiveness and he said he didn’t really have a reason, he was just stupid! So we got back together 3 days after I found out. The first week we were okay, but the second week turned to chaos, I started feeling insecure, every girl that called him, texted him or took a picture with him made me cringed, I will throw tantrums and break up with him, then call him back and all he would just say is “did you get over your little tantrums?” We stopped having real conversations, it seem like he would always cut our phone calls short and tell me I talk too much, so I started picking fights with him because that’s the only way I can get his attention if we’re not having seX. all he did was apologized but he never really made the effort of making it up to me, I didn’t make him fight for me, he stop spending time with and stop calling as often as he used to. HE cheated and when I forgave him it’s like I shot myself in the foot, because he completely changed, and I have been trying to show him that I have forgiven him by sending him cute messages in the middle of the night that he can read in the morning (he’s never done anything like this, his never even called me beautiful or complimented my new hairstyles or any effort i make for him) and we can move forward but he started acting as if I cheated or I have done something wrong, so I retaliated by constantly reminding him that he cheated. Anyways his been paying me no attention, unless we’re talking about sex, he doesn’t listen to anything else I have to say. So I decided to dump him on text after I called him to confine in him and he just completely disregarded my feelings and told me his going back to sleep. I text him and told him that it’s over and that I was not over him cheating on him. it’s been in days and he has not replied, probably because i also told him i was over him and hated him(lies), he wouId already called back by now to stop me from leaving but he hasn’t. I was only breaking up with as cry for attention and affection. Though we fought so much leading to the break up, we were always great and he made me so happy in a way no other man has ever before. I feel bad because I Forgave him for cheating then dumped him After I told him he was forguven. He probably thinks I’m just crazy. What do I do? Even though I initiated the break up, I don’t want to be the one that crawls back because I will be condoning the way he’s been treating me lately, I don’t want to feel neglected again but I want him to want back so badly that he would do anything to make it work and lasts
We texted incessantly for a month and went on our first date to an ice cream festival called The Scooper Bowl. I missed the train, and we kissed. We began a summer fling where we’d walk around Boston holding hands, eating pizza, and watching TV cuddled up on her couch. She made that summer in Boston perfect. It was only two months, but it was unfiltered romance.

Rachel Russo, a New York City-based dating and relationship expert with over ten years of experience as a matchmaker and relationship coach, plus a Master's Degree in marriage and family therapy, says being present and self-aware shows you the contributions you are also making to the unsatisfying relationship dynamic. "Coming to terms with your faults—and we all have them—means there is a lot of hope," Russo says. "Instead of just blaming your partner, you are able to recognize your thoughts and behaviors that are problematic and work on changing them. You develop empathy for your partner when you realize how you hurt them. Empathy helps you find and keep, and better the love."


The best way to optimize your chances of getting your ex bf back is to become Ungettable Girl.  You want to increase your value in his eyes and also make it difficult for him to reach you, talk to you, and see you.  This is just a small part of becoming the Ungettable Girl.  It’s also about making yourself beautiful in his eyes from afar.  He can see you, but now it is at a distance (through Snap chat, Facebook, etc).   Slowly over time, your ex boyfriend will crave you and you will do things to ensure that he feels that craving every day by using little jealousy ploys and rumors and chance encounters.  Your ex boyfriend loves nothing more than a good chase – so give him one. 

Spend time with good friends. One of the best ways to source yourself is to put yourself in the company of good friends. Good friends remind you of who you really are. They can give you a new perspective on things and can generally be fun to be around. Good friends serve as one of the best distractions as opposed to eating a bucket of ice cream and watching Netflix all alone because they can help to build you up in the meantime and leave you more empowered, stronger, and more in touch with who you are. It might be worth it to define who good friends are.Good friends are friends that help you choose the most useful and empowering interpretation of your situation. They don’t look to blame or help you wallow in self-pity. They have compassion for you, yet believe that you are inherently fine. They remind you of how fun you are and how much life itself has to offer. Spending time with people like this will feed your soul. During this time take advantage of everything these wonderful people in your life have to offer. Plan a trip. See that show you all always wanted to see. Do all the things that make you feel alive and do it in good company.
Hi, we work at same place and she sit just front of me so we see each other 100 times a day. Not able to apply no contact rule properly. Two months in no contact but not working as both are at same place. But whenever I text her in urgent no reply from her. In a month we will not be together, so should I wait to be apart when she will feel it or everything in her seems dead for me. I can’t take her rigid nature of not texting back or receive emergency call. What she want. I am not well and can’t focus on my personal life and career which is not good for me.
Act like nothing is wrong. Even if your guts are tumbling like clothes in a washing machine, try not to let her know. She's probably not going to want you back if you're acting depressed, mopey, or sulky. Make sure you're laughing and genuinely trying to have a good time. You might find that you've become a happier person along the way. If you are feeling depressed, surround yourself with friends or family. Don't wait alone in a corner and just hope for her to come back to you.

This may put pressure on you and make you feel self-conscious, and it should. The fact is, you conquer a man's heart by conquering what's in his pants, like no other woman ever could. Everything after that is easier. Yet again, this night needs to be different than in the past. It should not remind you too much of the time you were together before, it needs to be better.

So me and my ex fiance are no talking terms right now.. she left me a month ago and still wears the necklace I bought her and she wont give me the ring back because she says I bought it for her so its hers. I dont like to feel weak but I want her back and its super hard to not see or talk to her. She says im scum to her but then again she still has pictures of me and notes I sent her. Im at a loss right now what should I do to get her back
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Give yourself permission to stop trying when you're ready. No matter how good things used to be, or how much one party wants the relationship to keep going, sometimes it's clear that it has to end. If you've already put in effort trying to save the relationship, and you no longer feel love or the will to try to reignite it, it's OK not to force yourself to keep trying. Don't spend months or years dragging it out and criticizing yourself for not being able to make it work. It's OK to choose happiness over self-sacrifice. When one person stops participating in the relationship, it's better for both people if it ends.
"While some marriages end because both spouses want out, most troubled marriages have a spouse who wants to save the marriage," says Joe Beam, PhD, the founder and chair of Marriage Helper, adding that when there's someone still fighting for the marriage, there's hope that love can be renewed. "If you have a personal belief and value system that motivates you to finish what you start — especially if you feel that marriage is a life-long commitment—that's a sign things can look up."
This was 4 mouths ago. Then we saw us again had dinner, he was absolutly crazy about me but he was also pretty clear saying that he loving is new life and wants to stay single for some years.lol So when we were in the car i convince him to do it one last time. He was all ” thats not correct we still have feelings and i know what i want” we did it and it was more incredible. After that he writes me saying im amazing and he wants to do it again..
I kept thinking that she was crazy, and she was convinced that I was stupid. I was walking on eggshells because she was just so prickly. We never had sex anymore and we didn’t agree on anything. Technically we were living in a sexless marriage. Many of our fights (over little things) ended with one of us casually suggesting that divorce might be the answer. It hurt. When I thought of divorce, and the end of my family, I thought, How did we get to this? (Stopping the Fighting is the FIRST thing you need to do as I talk about in my article How to Fix a Broken Marriage)
he’s been exerting effort to focus on this other girl and probably hopes that they have a future together. i can sense though that he’s not totally happy. he’d still tell me that he misses the way we communicate. though i still sense his resistance, it bothered me why he still had to tell me that most of the time he can’t help but miss me in their conversations. i’m not sure what to make of his actions but i do believe that he still has strong feelings for me.
If you do happen to hear through the grapevine that your ex is seeing someone new, try not to jump to conclusions or let jealousy set in. By no means should you do anything to try to thwart a new relationship. Let your ex have some time to find out if you are really the one; you don't want to force a person to be with you who really wants to be with someone else.
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