Hi, I met the guy through online dating. After a months we’re meet up and start dating. He was talking about the future and need to get a baby with me and he said “I do love with you”. We have sex when 4th date after sex he’s talk about marright but I know he’s didn’t mean and serious about that We are continune date and get close to each other. He’s text me everyday, seem to care me and love to be with me. I’m fall in love with him. But two months later I feel something change and I’m opened mind to talk with him that I want to be in relationships (I know it huge mistake). After that I feel he’s try to step back, less text, careless and not interesting to me meet. I feel he’s make me last priority. I asked him about love and relationships, he said he do love me but we just know each other for 2 months why I love him so much! Now I’m move to other country before I leave I asked him don’t give up on us and made long distance work it out. But seem like no meaning for him. He’s answer few text and give me a call just twice since I leave. I’m insecure if I follow no contact rules I will lose him forever. Please advice me I few heartbroken right now.
Let’s say one night you decide to watch home movies from an old-fashion projector. You put in a video of you at 5 years old playing at your first recital. You curl up on the couch with popcorn and hot chocolate (two of your favorite things) and begin to watch. Unfortunately, there appears to be a weird blemish in the video, so you decide to change it and put on a video of your 10th birthday party but somehow the blemish is in that video too. So, you run over to the wall, wipe the screen, and put in one more video… yet again, the spot is still showing up.
a lack of respect on either side. If you or your ex call each other names, belittle each other's accomplishments, or say disparaging things about one another to your family or friends, then there is no respect in that relationship. These are all features of an emotionally abusive relationship. Find someone who shows you the respect you deserve, and commit to treating him or her with respect as well.
btw I got stuck in this funny situation I don’t know if it’s possible but can you or your staff delete my comment stating my story ( on august 19, 2018) ? A friend of mine is suggesting this site for me and I’m too afraid that she may read my comment here she will instantly know it’s me .. Im so totally busted if that happens hahahaha pretty please help mee all of my NC plan will go to nothing if this happen cause she’s pretty close to my ex and I can’t really trust her mouth LOL..
I don’t know what to do. I met this guy. Stayed the night with him since DAY ONE. Five and a half years. It was an extremely rough relationship. Started fighting after six months. I couldn’t forgive him for all the bad things he had done to us. Lie after lie after lie. He went away for six months best the end of our relationship and we talked on the phone every single day. When he came back home, we both said that we would do whatever it takes to make things work for good. No arguing, etc. I couldn’t let go of the past and I started arguing with him about EVERYTHING. Especially if he even looked at another woman. Things got really really bad at the end. I started treating him like crap and didn’t care how I talked to him. After we broke up we still talked almost every day. He would still come over and be with me. But, I kept messing things up. I still would start arguments because I was afraid that he was putting other women above me. He’s dating one of our co workers now. And he moved in with her too. We’ve officially been separated for six and a half months now. He officially started dating her after I snapped at him one last time back in the beginning of February. I don’t feel the same tension that I did. I don’t feel the same hate anymore. I love him so much and I want him back. I got upset with him in the beginning of March and he teared up and told me that “I wanted it to be YOU!!!” But, he’s with this new chick. And he said that it’s a new relationship. How do I get him back? I know he loves me. I know it to be true. We all three work together but rarely do I see her anymore. Please, help me. I did the no contact rule for 30 days. April 2nd, before leaving work I apologized for being so selfish during the breakup and told him that I it makes me so happy to see him happy. He sincerely said “Thank you”. After he was shocked that is. After that day, we started having more laughs at work. Then I text him something funny the other day after we got off work and he responded “lol”. I haven’t heard from him since. I’m worried that he’s too happy and comfortable in his new relationship that I won’t be able to get him back into my personal life again. What am I to do?
my ex and i broke up a couple of months ago. He broke up with me because he did not want a relationship anymore and i cheated on him. We dated for almost two years..After our break up he wanted to be friends and i didn’t. i want to be more and this kept going back and forth. We did hu a couples of times and he would say i love you. He said he wanted something more but not a relationship and not exclusive. I told we can talk to be something or we don’t talk anymore so we agreed on not talking.. We were on good terms and we said i love you and stop talking for a few days. But i texted and he said he doesn’t want to talk to me and he doesn’t want to be friends anymore.. so i need advice should i just give him time and see what happens? what should i do? I still have feeling for this guy and i don’t know if he even does.
Often the problems that are truly unmanageable occur when both partners have opposing interests. Here are some examples: one person tries to dominate the other, one person wishes to leave the home whenever he/she chooses, one person reserves the right to see friends all during the week, one person is a philanderer, one person assigns work to the other, one person refuses responsibility for a child, one person begrudges spending money on the other or on the family. Naturally, the other spouse will resent being dominated, or ignored, or taken advantage of. These problems cannot be resolved just by understanding the other better. These are examples of one person putting himself/herself first. When a couple has opposing interests, the problems they develop are likely to prove intractable.
Sorry I know this is ridiculous and LONG. So its been a week since he dumped me, all my friends are telling me to forget him and move on. That if he wanted to be with me he would. I just cant..i even took your advice and went on a date last weekend and it only made me miss him more. I want to reach out to him now. I was thinking about leaving a voicemail directly. I want him to hear my voice and hear me explain. My friends said not to, but i think it may help if he really hears me. All our stupid fighting has been through text and I think that only makes things worse. Any advice would be great!
Okay, so My situation is very different and I’m still in need of some advice (this was VERY helpful though, THANK YOU!). When my ex and I first met, it was through some friends when we went out to a bar. We jumped into a relation just a few weeks after meeting, which I felt was very soon for me. I felt that he and I hadn’t really connected completely and that during the relationship I didn’t know him as well as well as I did previous boyfriends because we weren’t really close before we decided to give the relationship a try, unlike my past relationships where we were friends for at least a month or two before taking the next step. But that’s not the main reason why we broke up. I had trust issues from the past few relationships I had been in. I was cheated on multiple times, led on, and in the most recent relationship before my ex and I, I was left for another girl. I couldn’t really get over all of that and instead of letting it go, I carried that with me and lived in fear of the day that my now ex-boyfriend would do the same. After having a serious talk and explaining that to him, he made it clear that I didn’t trust him, but trust is one of the most important factors in a relationship. He felt that because I didn’t trust him and because I hurt his feelings by telling him how I felt, that he couldn’t trust me. So, we came to a conclusion and decided that since I felt we were’t very close to begin with and since we both felt that we don’t trust each other enough to be in a relationship, that we’d start over as friends and see where we end up. I explained to him that I care about him and that I don’t plan on seeing anyone else unless he finds someone new, that I’m exclusive to him. And he said he was exclusive to me as well. So my question is, how do I earn his trust back? I’m ready to be with him again, I’m not worried about him hurting me anymore like my exes did before and I have no doubts about weather or not I’d be able to make this work on my end. So how do I earn his trust? I plan on spending time with him and taking the advice already given from this article, so what else can I do? I know I need to be patient and I understand that it’s going to be hard since I’m so ready to give this another try. Is there anything else that I need to understand before I really work my ass off to get him back?
Change it up. If you continue to respond in the way that's brought you pain and unhappiness in the past, you can't expect a different result this time. Just one little shift can make a big difference. If you usually jump right in to defend yourself before your partner is finished speaking, hold off for a few moments. You'll be surprised at how such a small shift in tempo can change the whole tone of an argument.
My GF and I were together for close to a year. She broke up with me about 3 months ago. Our relationship was actually really good. We hadn’t had any real disagreements. We communicated really well. We were planning on living together. Then Oade a huge mistake. I lied to her about something huge and important. I did so because I let my ego and pride get in the way of my rational thinking. She has completely shut me out of her life. She has blocked me from her phone, email and FB. I did make all of the early breakup mistakes like pleading with her to take me back. Apologizing over and over. It finally dawned on me that I never let her know that I wasn’t taking her feelings into consideration. I let her know that I did after a short period of time. I have read several different get your ex back e-books. All of them do not seem very promising as I am a woman and I try to think about how I would react to some of the steps given. I have done the no contact step. I have written her a couple of letters apologizing again. The last letter I wrote I basically told her some things I loved about her, how I was angry that when the going got tough she ran and that I was saying goodbye and good luck to her. I just dropped it off so I have not received a response…if I get one at all. I do love her and I do want her back. I can honestly say she is the one for me. Some of my friends have given me the “there are other fish in the sea” speech. That’s not what I want. I want the one that I love back. I guess I’m looking for some more advice. Anything I have missed in this whole process. Thanks head of time for any advice given. I do really appreciate it.
Many online relationship "experts" will tell you to play power games to win back the love in your relationship, or to reignite the spark. Don't do it. If you purposely ignore your partner or intentionally act cold and distant, you are playing a game. And while this sort of behavior may lead to increased attention from a partner for a short while, it will not have a long-lasting effect on your relationship. If you frequently act rude or mean, ignore your partner, or act cold and distant, your partner will eventually lose interest in you.
I discovered I was pregnant I wanted to keep the baby but he wanted me to have an abortion. After too much pressure from him I gave in and aborted. He’s gone MIA ever since, he won’t respond to texts and only answers my calls after like the fourth ring I apologized this morning for being too demanding about the abortion money he said that he would think about it and that he would organize on how I’d get my stuff from his place. I really love him and I don’t know what to do or where to begin without him. Can the no contact rule to work in this case? Do I have any chances?
Regardless of what's going on in your marriage, you still know in your heart that you can talk to your husband about how you truly feel. "We all crave acceptance for who we really are," says Beam. "Not pretending to be what the other person wants us to be is crucial. If both people continue to offer the other safety to be transparent without judgment or rejection, their relationship is highly susceptible to being saved," says Beam.
So me and my ex fiance are no talking terms right now.. she left me a month ago and still wears the necklace I bought her and she wont give me the ring back because she says I bought it for her so its hers. I dont like to feel weak but I want her back and its super hard to not see or talk to her. She says im scum to her but then again she still has pictures of me and notes I sent her. Im at a loss right now what should I do to get her back
I was really anxious and worried at that point of time and I sensed something was wrong and I’ve kept telling him and saying I was wrong and I shouldn’t be so sensitive and paranoid, asking him questions everytime. He said he couldn’t see a future in us seeing that I’ll always ask him questions that made him uneasy everytime we meet. I reflected and thought back, I really shouldn’t be like this and I told him I’ll change on my end and all. But he seems determined to be really ending of this relationship with me.
Me and my ex boyfriend broke up last night, I think of him everyday. I can’t sleep he’s always on my mind. I want him back to me :( I don’t know what will I do I miss him. I Want to text, call and see him asap :(((( I don’t want to be stock on this break up what will I do I want him back as soon as possible :( I want to apologize with him. But he said its over, let’s stop this. And I feel sad and hurt at the same time its my fault that’s then. I broke my promise once again and he hates mo for doing that. :( I really want him back :(
After a year and few months, my ex left me cold turkey. I’ve been told that it was immature or just selfish the way she just stopped..talking. She was 25 and I was her 2nd real boyfriend, she was a goodie stay at home girl. Well it’s been almost a year, and she’s still on my mind, i still wish we were together, maybe after I get my RN license, i can talk to her again. Sometimes I want to text her just to ask how she is or somehow to see that beautiful smile of hers again..It sucks that when I think of us, I think of all the good, fun, and happy times, and I never think of the bad times that happened between us, unless someone actually tells me to think about it, and think about how she made me stress and how she didn’t appreciate the things I would do for her. Sad thing is it feels like all she ever thinks about are the bad things and the faults during our relationship. I think this is where people that are in love differ…I can only see what makes her so special to me and why its so hard for me to remember the not so green side of the relationship. Maybe finding someone that sees only the good in me is what love truly is. Its 3am I’m incoherent, I’ll probably forget I ever wrote this..
My vibe was affected by stress of school and radiated out into other areas of my life without my realizing…granted my ex never communicated how I was making him feel, but the breakup made me realize what had happened and how i can get those stress levels down and vibe up…I am prepared it is too late…he will never be able to share those vibes. But if he doesn’t hes also missing out because I feel good, a little sad it didn’t work out, but good overall.
Holy spirt speak to Shirmal and get him on the right path away from temptation & urge of drak forces. Right now he is in your domain in Rome… Please I seek your blessing and guidense to retreat our relationship and love & care for one another. Keep us together thru thick & thin times. Let us not get distracted or deviate away from each other’s company..
Thanks for this post, Jason. After I read it I had a little hope that me and my ex-boyfriend COULD get back together. But then I scrolled down to the comments and I read everyone else’s comments, apprehensions, fears, emotional and psychological hardships that they’re going through and I wondered — if this is how a person is making us feel, is it worth it?
DONT blow up her phone. and DONT beg for her, thats unattractive and foolish. you have to show her a friend, and that you dont need her. you wont be able to make her jealous because shell be glad youre gone. you have to meet her in person, and show her a man, and that you are serious. dont show her a little kid who wants her to feel bad for you. show her a man, looking for a serious relationship. dont be needy, and dont let your messages exceed double digits to her in a day.
Lord I come to you with worry on my heart. I broke my boyfriend’s heart, and my have lost him forever. I just ask that you give him the gift of forgiveness. I ask that you open his heart and allow him to see that our relationship is worth saving. I ask that you be a force in our relationship and help us to fight through this terrible time and fix our relationship one day at a time. I don’t know where else to turn and I know that you work miracles. I am asking for a miracle at this point. Things look really bad right now but I know that all I need is faith the size of the mustard seed. I pray that you help me and my boyfriend get through this and I pray that my family stays together, I ask this in your name.
First, let’s make one thing clear: just because your partner is exhibiting a couple of the behaviours that I just talked about doesn’t mean that they’re definitely planning to file for divorce. It may simply be that these are indicators of trouble ahead in your marriage. But if you’ve seen several of these indicators in your spouse recently, and you’re feeling that things aren’t on track with your marriage, I encourage you to act to turn things around now before matters get any worse.
Neglect is an awful word in relationships. So is taking your mate for granted. It communicates a negative sentiment. If you want to save a failing relationship you cherish then you need to focus on the needs of your partner. It cannot be about you all the time. Listen to her music. Go to his sporting event. Show a genuine interest in the things that matter to her/him. Learn your partner’s love language and speak it.
You are always going to come up with some reason why you have to contact him. You saw sneakers he would love on sale, you saw a meme he would find hilarious, it’s his birthday, it’s his dog’s birthday, you really want to update him on your crazy co-worker and the latest installment of her shenanigans, and on and on. But you must resist! Recognize what’s really happening, there is nothing urgent you need to tell him, you just want to talk to him because you miss him. But remember reaching out at this stage will not bring him back into your life.
Me and my girl been dating for almost 18 months. And I became depending and demanding which leads to posessive attitude. Starts acting jealous and shit. The last months before we broke up we had a huge fight. We yelled to each other, and she hits and kicks me like crazy and I lose my temper back then. I slap her cheek once (not in purpose) and I cried over her because I felt so wronged for doing that. Things seems to go well, but all of a sudden she blow up some litlle mess into a reason for broke me up. She oftenhy hide something for me. Even lied to me. But I don’t know, my heart still beats for her. I even saw still her posting pics on our date. Been 6 months since we broke up and she never respond to my text and calls. I tried to hold it, but last week we talked through text. And I begged her to come back. Remind her things we used to do. But the answer is “no, I can’t be with you anymore” “don’t bother me!” “Go find another girl, or either I will” . She’s an introvert. I always honest to her. Never mess with any other girl. And I’m the one who took her virginity. I feel responsible for that. I don’t want another man used her! Need to get her back. But none of no talking method works. I feel guilty when I text and begged her after months I gave her own space to cool down. :( I really love her man. Please help me. Desperately needed advice. Thanks a lot. -z-
Sometimes the break up is so unique or troubling or complex, that it requires some specialized coaching. Or sometimes, people do better if they can talk to someone who is an expert at helping folks with their relationship troubles. Well, if you fall into that category, then you are in luck. All you need to do is reach out to me (i.e. click Coaching Services in my website’s Menu Section) and I am sure we can work out something!
This is when I felt like I really met Mary. I wasn’t angry, I wasn’t jealous, and I wasn’t distracted—I had a clear mind, and I loved her. She was the kind of girl I’d always call back, and always take out for dates, and always hold hands with. She’s the kind of girl I never want to be away from. I’d seen what life looked like without Mary (cue damp Jimmy Stewart shouting “Mahhhhrrrrrryyyyy, don’t you remember me Mary?” in It’s a Wonderful Life), and I had a new appreciation for her. I loved the person she had turned into: She had built a life for herself in New York and was the person I know she always wanted to be—she grew her bangs out, too, which I guess is a big thing for women?