I enjoyed reading your above article and while most of it is useful to me, my situation is a little more complex. The ex that I want back isn’t a recent ex. we broke up in high school. Well I say broke up but more like I just ignored him (give me a break I was 16). He didnt treat me bad and neither of us cheated on each other. He was my first real boyfriend and I realized that this could be way more then I was emotionally prepared for. After high school I emailed him apologizing for my stupid behavior and immaturity but he didn’t reply. Karma at its finest! I told myself then that ‘well I trided, move on’ Recently while reading another article he came into mind and hasn’t left. He has consumed my brain. He lives on the other side of the country and has a girlfriend (I can add Facebook stalker to my resume now) I know I hurt him but I feel like we have “unfinished business”. How do I get his attention again?How do I make him want to contact me even if it is to tell me to go pound sand?

Remember this step– and really this whole process– is about you. Yes, it is also highly likely that this step will make him miss you, but again, that’s not the focus. Your focus should be on getting to the best possible headspace and having the best possible mindset so you are your best possible self. That is the foundation for lasting love, not tricks and gimmicks.

Relationships cannot survive on love. Trust is the foundation upon which all relationships are built. If you break trust with your partner, the relationship suffers. In order to rebuild trust you have to repair the hurt you inflicted on your mate. In my work with couples, I guide them through a 5 step process to repair hurt. For easy remembering the steps begin with the letter A.
Make sure you are both open to change. If your primary goal is to protect yourself in the relationship from hurt and anger, you aren't open to change. Instead, you'll likely want to control your partner to enforce that protection, making your relationship negative and stagnant. On the other hand, if you're both willing to learn and grow together, your relationship can develop over time into something better. If only one of you is willing to change, it may not work.[24]

You have to look at both negative and positive aspects of your ex and your relationship. Every couple on the face of this planet fights, but if you two broke up, then chances are there was something seriously wrong with your relationship. Think about your relationship rationally. Don’t let your emotions control your thoughts. Imagine, you are a parent and your child was in the same situation as you, would you still tell your son or daughter to get their ex back?
The best thing you can do in this scenario aside from not putting up a fight at all is to actually agree with her. She’s not going to be expecting this reaction. None of her carefully involved scenarios that she practiced before the breakup speech involved your agreement. You just beat her at her own game. She’ll start thinking back to your relationship and wonder why she never realized that you were unsatisfied in the relationship as well.

Commit to having a better relationship. If your ex-boyfriend takes you back, you both need to take steps to make sure that the same problems that caused your last breakup will not interfere with your relationship again. Talk to each other about what kinds of conflicts you have had in the past and how you could deal with them more appropriately going forward.[9]
st. jude i pray that i want a better relationship with my boyfriend rudy open his heart and his eyes and let him see that i really do love him, care for him keep him away from his ex yvette that she doesn’t come between our relationship let him realize that am the woman of his dreams n that i will make him happy n love him forever help him be abetter man for me and my daughter , san jude i really love him please help me change him into a good person and that he just have eyes for me …..amen in the one of the father and son and hoy spirt amen

but him? he dated a lot of girls most were varsity players of volleyball from different universities. then comes this girl. a sta player of the leading team from one of the most popular and exclusive school for rich people. that girl adored my ex bf and i know my ex reciproacates her feelings. she is so popular rich and i honestly say that she is cute too. but i am not having insecurities from that girl. i know im not ugly and it is just being rich and popular is not in the cards for me. my problem is my ex told me that he loves us both. and cant make up her mind who to choose. he still controls me. he replied and answers call from my guy friends and admirers. but i told him i dont have any plans of replacing him. by the way we still live together. but he is seeing that other girl from time to time. he even has the nerve to tell all the deails of their dates. i dont know if he is just trying to make me jealous or he is just being a complete jerk. the other day he told me that he is choosing me over that girl but yesterday he was with a date with her. i love him so much and weve been together for two years. what should i do? sigh


I was with my ex gf for about a year and no lie, she is the only girl i have ever really felt happy with. Well anyways, i feel that its my fault because i decided to take a brake with the relationship. Now she has a boyfriend who she has been with for 2-3 years. She and I still talk and hang out every now and then (her boyfriend doesnt know she hangs out with me nor does he know who i am), but it feels wrong to me. I know she has a boyfriend so i respect her and keep my hands to myself. She tells me things like “even thoughi have a boyfriend, you were still the best boyfriend i ever had”, or “sometimes i wish you never broke up with me”. I am currently going to college and she had just graduated high school (we are both 18). Her boyfriend doesnt go to school and does not have a job, so i asked her why she has a boyfriend that isn’t doing anything with his life and she said, “because i love him”, that left me speechless. I know he doesnt deserve her because he always argues and cusses at her, doesnt trust her (what is a relationship without trust?), he keeps her on check (where are you at? Who are you with? What are to doing?). I have never cussed at her, yes we argued sometimes but got over them easily. I listen to what she has to say and I’m there for her when she needs it. It hurts everytime she talks about him and even when she talks to him on the phone in front of me (he doesnt know that i am with her) and tells him “i love you” right before they hang up. I miss her so much and wish that she and I can continue our relationship. I can’t be “just friends”because I’ve known her as my lover and nothing less. I really dont know what to do, but what i don’t want is to have to move on. Pleeeaaassse help me out.

We also know that there are exceptions. There are relationships that probably should not stay together, such as those with physical violence, cruel and ongoing verbal abuse, extreme anger management issues, or long-term unaddressed substance abuse, for example. If you're in a situation like that, please eek the help of your local crisis management center.
I learned by my girlfriend’s friend that she fell in love with another guy. It’s the middle of summer so I can’t see her or talk to her since she doesn’t have her phone(even when she had it she didn’t answer). I truly love her and need some help with this, not to be weak but because I love her, and I fear that she might go out with that guy if she breaks up with me. Is there a way for me to make her have feelings for me again? A way for not to break up with me?
He ended things.. This is a guy who comes back to me and has my number for 5 years. And we were so intimate and shared our past. He said didn’t want to play games this time. He came 4 hrs back and forth to spend time with me. Pursues me. Why? What does he want? Why travel in total 8 hrs to come have sex with me? He like a egotistical narcissistic unemotional prick. Please advice.. Btw I never responded to his message. I left things.
Okay so me & my ex boyfriend broke up like a couple months ago. Me and him have been dating for over a year. Ever since we got into high school he changed. He’s like every other guy now. During our relationship, he would cry when I left or if I took the bracelet he gave me off. I just really want him back, I still do love him. I honestly need to know what to do. Help me please
Hey, my name is Anissa Johnson. I’m only 13, but I have someone that I really love, but he broke up with me because I was disrespectful. He broke up with me last week and its hard. But I’m going try all these steps I hope it work. Excepted one thing he’s making me jealous so I really don’t know what to. I hope these steps work because we were supposed to plan stuff in the future and live our lives together so going use all the step and see what happens
I met a guy whilst on holiday in Egypt. He seemed really lovely and we saw each other every day and eventually went to his flat ad stayed there at night with him so we were spending 24 hours a day together. Hr said he loves me and wants to marry me I didn’t take it too serious but then I found I had called for him. On my last day he gave me his number and Facebook. When I got back to England I looked at his Facebook it was all women tourists which he has commented on their wall my love habibi and sending hearts to them. The two profiles I could see were a year ago these comments were made but I would not have gone there at all of I had of seen this to start with. He also had one for Arab friends. I went to finish it because I am 43 and he is 26 and I can’t be doing with the drama of Facebook. He never added me but said he would delete his facebooks it took him a couple of weeks but he did it. I said messenger as well because of all these women he had contact with. He said he would and he did. We have spoken everyday and night then hr started no messaging me at night his cousin told me he takes women out shopping at night for money so when he wasn’t messaging me he was doing that and he was saying no women. I made a fake profile of a woman who was gorgeous and he added her on messenger before he deleted it.It came to a massive argument he said I was jealous etc and he said he wanted to finish it. I did a terrible thing and emailed his work and told them he was taking women outside the hotel (they aren’t supposed to) and he got fired. When I got a response from the hotel they said this isn’t the first or last time it will happen that’s why he got fired. We still were speaker he was still telling me he loved me and messaging me but he was sad about loosing his job and I feel so guilty I just got sick of the lies (if they are lies) I was to meet his family and then we were planning to get married. I forgave him for all that because I know I can be jealous. I don’t know if it because I wouldn’t act like this when I have a boyfriend. Anyway a week ago he sent me a message saying I will need forgive you for loosing my job no work etc. Although I had sent money equilvilent to his monthly salary that he lost and said I would do it every month till he gets a job because his family rely on HIM for money. We had a n arguement he blocked me off wats app downloaded messenger again. I downloaded viber a day later and said I loved him he said he loved me and missed me and hr wasnt going to delete messenger although he says he wants this to speak to his family he has gone to see his family so I wander is he speaking to the women he had on Facebook? He hadn’t initially told his mom about me sending and email to his work bit has now told her she says I am bad and he isn’t to marry me he said loves me still I said I will leave him till he has got rid off messenger. He said OK I love you and that was three days ago. I read this article and feel better but I do miss him but do wander is it worth all the bother with this silly apps x
My ex and I broke up a few weeks ago because he started hanging out with new friends that I never liked because they are all bad boys. After 2 years and 6 months in the relationship he suddenly changed his mind about us. He started texting other girls which he said was his friends he even had pictures of them on his phone. I didn’t like that at all because I saw that these girls are starting to like him. So basically it was my fault he broke up with me for being insecure, clingy and not trusting him. He told me he doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship right now but he still loves me. He wants to explore life without a girlfriend and not wanting to hurt me when he meet up with new girls and such. I really do love him with all my heart, and maybe he just needs some space to think, or maybe our relationship got a bit boring. I am so willing to follow these steps to get him back, I’m so not going to lose him to a bunch of girls!
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