Well firstly, wherever you arrange to meet, make sure YOU arrive there about 10 minutes LATE. This way you’ll seem in no way desperate to have her back, or to impress her. Desperation and the desire to impress are traits that women associate with LOWER value men, therefore if you show them, they’d only turn her off. But if you can just show up a little late, that will prevent any desperation or desire to impress from coming across.
Don't try to save a relationship that's toxic or abusive. There's really no way to work on a relationship that's based on toxic patterns or abuse. No amount of working on communication techniques or trying to reignite the romance is going to make things better long-term. You may feel that you're getting something out of the relationship, but you have a lot more to gain by being free.
Hey I need help! So me and my ex broke up 2 weeks ago. I tried to get her back at first but stopped after I saw it wasn’t working. I just started the no contact phase and am giving her time it’s been 3 days no contact. I’m fine with the no contact but here’s the tricky part, shes getting surgery Tuesday(4 days from now) and is really nervous. When we were together I was a jerk and didn’t make a big deal about it and it hurt her. So now what Idk is should I text her the night before and say something about it like goodluck don’t be nervo use it’ll be okay, just good luck or nothing at all? Help please!!
First, let’s make one thing clear: just because your partner is exhibiting a couple of the behaviours that I just talked about doesn’t mean that they’re definitely planning to file for divorce. It may simply be that these are indicators of trouble ahead in your marriage. But if you’ve seen several of these indicators in your spouse recently, and you’re feeling that things aren’t on track with your marriage, I encourage you to act to turn things around now before matters get any worse.
So, follow the advice above, and then do this - do more of the above. Lots more. The common thread Gottman found that predicts divorce so well is weaved into it, and it is this: for a marriage to be stable, you must have lots more positive interactions than negative interactions. How much more? Twice as much? No. Three times as much? No. The positive has to outweigh the negative by at least five to one. This is not a number pulled out of a hat. It is a fact.
My boyfriend broke up with me a week ago because he didn’t want commitment and he didn’t like the distance (Im about an hour and a half away for school) I came home every single weekend to hang out with him even if it was only for a couple hours but apparently he just couldn’t handle that anymore.. We would have been dating a year on Feb 27th. He said that he’s been doubting things for a while but couldn’t tell me right away. He said a relationship isn’t for him and he just needs to do his own thing right now. Also he said he’s not in love but he loves me in the sense he’d do anything for me which makes no sense? He bought me a together forever charm for my bracelet and said all these really sweet things that I just can’t get out of my head. The day after we broke up he already hung out with a girl and he’s trying to get with girls so much younger than him since everyone is away at college and he decided to take a year off. Im done school in 2 months so I guess i’m just wondering if he’ll come back? I can’t picture him just leaving me completely we’ve known each other for so long and had the best times when we were together. I think he just needs time to think and do his own thing for a bit until im home a lot more often. Please, does anyone have any thoughts? It would help a lot! Thanks <3
Then you cry, and maybe even look up to the sky, maybe even pray and think, ‘Please… Just let me get back with my ex. I hope my ex is just making a mistake and he/she wasn’t thinking it through. I know we are perfect for each other. I want to just call my ex up and say “I love you”.’ Then you look at your phone every half an hour, check your messenger, facebook, instagram, twitter, and heck… email inbox, to see if your ex would want to talk to you, all ready to get back together.
Seems like you'll get him back. You've seen each other a couple of times and things are going good. It seems like all will work out great! But wait, and re-think it. Don't fall into the trap of thinking all is good now and that you'll just be fine… you may not. People that get back together tend to go back to their old, real ways, because they did not make any real, fundamental changes to their lives.
About 2 weeks ago, after an intense brunch date he texts me saying he doesn’t think I am capable of or know how to be in a solid relationship. He listed all my flaws (he was right about some of it) and he pretty much said he didn’t want to be in a relationship where his girlfriend showed no emotion. Other hurtful things were said and I was blindsided by it all.
It was clear to me that the authors knew what they were talking about. They know relationships and the methods that can be used to manipulate women. So I started following their advice. My girlfriend began trying to set up a meeting with me. At first, she was pretending that it was coincidental, but then told me straight up that she wanted to work things out! I couldn’t believe what I was hearing!
You can’t just dive back into the relationship and expect everything to be different this time around. You broke up for a reason, probably several reasons, and those reasons will still be there unless properly dealt with. You can’t do the same thing and expect different results, that’s just insane (literally, I think that’s the actual definition of insanity).

My boyfriend just broke up with me a week ago. We had been dating about 4 months. The first two months of our relationship, he worked a normal 9-5 job and we were able to see each other once, twice, or even more times a week. In December he went back to working a completely opposite shift as me, and six days a week, meaning that we had very little time to see each other. Only about once every week to two weeks. We talked about how difficult it was to see each other because of his work schedule, but that he really cared about me and was going to try to make it work because it meant something to him. The next time I saw him three weeks later, he said that he didn’t think he would be able to commit the time to the relationship. It wasn’t that he didn’t care about me, or enjoy my company, but that he couldn’t see me very often and when he had time off on the weekends, there were other things that he needed to do because he could only do them then. He said that it didn’t mean he wouldn’t be interested in taking me out every couples of weeks or so, but that it wouldn’t be anything more than a date, not a relationship. He also said that it had nothing to do with anything that I did, that he always had a great time with me (we never got into any fights or arguments), and the breakup wasn’t anything he particularly wanted to do, but he knew that I wanted more than he could give me. He mentioned that if his schedule changed in the somewhat near future, or if his feelings towards committing to a relationship changed, I would be the first one to know. I really feel like we’re right together, and he said that he thought we were good together, and I could honestly see myself with him for the long haul. How long should I wait before I contact him? We had talked everyday for the past 3 months, and now nothing. He’s leaving for a 3 week long business trip in April. Should I contact him and try to see him before he leaves, or wait until he gets back? I would be willing to have a relationship with him even if it meant not seeing him very often, as long as I knew we would be serious once he got back on a different schedule. I’m pretty upset and hurt about it, and any advice would be helpful. Thanks!
We’ll i hope theres someone out there that can truly help me with all BS aside… Im senior at my hight school and my girlfriend is a junior. I know my girlfriend left me for pressuring her of wanting to hang out more when she was busy with school… But i have an explanation for my behavior…soo me and my girl friend where going to be 1 year in may 8th of 2014 but she broke up with me may 4th :,( … Im not going to lie i would get mad at my girlfriend but its only cuz i wanted to talk to her more…try to understand that i started going out with her my junior year with 2 months of school left and then i got use to seeing her everyday and hanging out with her nearly everyday…so once school started , it was hard for me to make that transition of not seeing/hanging out with her so i would finish my hwk and work hard so i could talk to her yet sometimes she would procrastinate so most of the time she called to say goodnight and i just felt bad cuz i really love this girl and wanted to talk to her ….im not going to lie we both have our attitudes but ill admit me more than her …she never did nothing but love me…she didnt judge me even though im pretty skinny yet i would be an ass and jude her at time …ima admit compared to her i was an ass …all i really wanted to do was keep communication but i added more stress on top of her school stress …now shes gone and its been 5 days since she broke up with me on may 4th and its just really hard cuz shes tells me that shell think of me and her getting back together but that she wont consider it…so it just brings me down….we’ve been through so much for her to just cut it …her mom and dad were surprised that she broke up with me cuz they even said i respected her a lot …so im trying not to listen to her negative comments because she might not mean it and shes just saying it right now so i figured ill give her space but i really need some advice to win her back …i want her back and i just cant let go…don’t think that because were teenagers its just young foolish love …i really do love her and believe anything is possible …after all we did start of as strangers and she rejected me the first time and after 2 months i asked her and won her…this girl is really special and i know i took her for granted and that was wrong of me…HELP PLEASE… Ima give her space and not text her or do anything else so she can hopefully think of things but i honestly need advice..please

I was with my ex gf for about a year and no lie, she is the only girl i have ever really felt happy with. Well anyways, i feel that its my fault because i decided to take a brake with the relationship. Now she has a boyfriend who she has been with for 2-3 years. She and I still talk and hang out every now and then (her boyfriend doesnt know she hangs out with me nor does he know who i am), but it feels wrong to me. I know she has a boyfriend so i respect her and keep my hands to myself. She tells me things like “even thoughi have a boyfriend, you were still the best boyfriend i ever had”, or “sometimes i wish you never broke up with me”. I am currently going to college and she had just graduated high school (we are both 18). Her boyfriend doesnt go to school and does not have a job, so i asked her why she has a boyfriend that isn’t doing anything with his life and she said, “because i love him”, that left me speechless. I know he doesnt deserve her because he always argues and cusses at her, doesnt trust her (what is a relationship without trust?), he keeps her on check (where are you at? Who are you with? What are to doing?). I have never cussed at her, yes we argued sometimes but got over them easily. I listen to what she has to say and I’m there for her when she needs it. It hurts everytime she talks about him and even when she talks to him on the phone in front of me (he doesnt know that i am with her) and tells him “i love you” right before they hang up. I miss her so much and wish that she and I can continue our relationship. I can’t be “just friends”because I’ve known her as my lover and nothing less. I really dont know what to do, but what i don’t want is to have to move on. Pleeeaaassse help me out.
My boyfriend and I just broke up a few days ago. He said it wasn’t working out between us. He said that we argue too much and that I get frustrated way too easily. We did argue and I would get mad over little things. But we would always talk out the issues and for the most part move on from them. Recently I had become really jealous of this girl that works with us. I felt like she was extra flirty with him and it made me feel insecure. I talked to him about it and told him to say something to her about it. He declined saying that it would make there working relationship awkward. He said I should trust him and he does not like her. I kept pressing. The next day he broke up with me. I really care about him and I want him back. I’ve been texting him constantly and I feel bad for doing that. I will give him some space to think and hopefully this will help us. I really want us to be together.

Relationships often go through difficulties and misunderstandings. You most likely had serious arguments, after which you forgave each other. Sometimes, arguments lead to the demise of a relationship, though. And if you don’t start to act, having a good idea of what you need to do, your relationship will be doomed forever. It depends on you whether you will get your girlfriend back, or if she would be gone forever.
He said that he didn’t think that we had enoughin common, which isn’t true because we would do so many old and new things together. When we broke up he said that he felt like we stopped being friends but then later saud the he was still my friend because we were really good friends. He also still wanted to hug and touch me and told me that he still wanted to do those things. None ofthis made any sense to me. 

Seriously?? That’s actually what I was kinda thinking!my girlfriend left me last November and i really want her back still!!she blocked me on facebook not long ago it couldn’t of been but maybe a few days if that!until I noticed I wasn’t blocked anymore!i only message her about once every week or two!i can see that she reads them but I never get a reply!i just know that I was messing up a lot…not cheating but…anyways I also finally started a very good new job I hope this will help?
Healing your marriage is about deciding what changes your relationship needs in order to be stronger, healthier and happier, and then making those changes happen. It is about taking charge and not letting the winds of fate control your lives. “Yes,” you say. “Where do I begin? What do I work on? How am I going to save my marriage?” Well, your answers begin here.

The fact is, if your ex starts dating someone else soon after a breakup, then it’s definitely a rebound relationship. And rebound relationships never last. In fact, it just means that after you broke up, your ex had a huge hole in their life that they are trying to fill with someone new. In many cases, they rush into it too soon and things get too serious really fast. There is nothing to worry about as the faster it moves, the faster it will end.
Your first problem is that through your internal, OCD, one-track, incessant hamster wheel thoughts (and it doesn’t matter if no one knows what you’re thinking. Your thoughts will always seep out into your actions) and through your actions, you are essentially begging for him back. You have to take a step back, take a breath and vow to put an end to the crazy, an END to the insanity. No one likes crazy and it looks pathetic, desperate and awful on anyone that tries it on. Begging for him back is the worst approach possible. Men, no matter what they may claim, are very territorial. Men want what they can’t have. He may scream from the rooftops that he doesn’t want you and never wants to see you again and he may even really think that he doesn’t want you but I can assure you, he won’t sleep well at night wondering why it is that suddenly you appear to not give a flying F*CK and why it is you’ve gone from Desperate Debby to #IDFWU please-forget-my-name Patty.
And while we’re talking about jealousy, you should also try to refrain from reacting if he posts a picture with a girl, or likes a girl’s social media posts, or even if he starts dating a girl. Jealousy is ugly, unattractive, and destructive. Maybe you’re hurt that he seems to be moving on, but lashing out at him is not going to swing the pendulum back in your favor. And you really don’t know what’s going on. Maybe it’s a rebound fling, maybe the girl in the picture is his cousin, who knows and who cares? This is not where you should be putting your attention at the moment.

Healing your marriage is about deciding what changes your relationship needs in order to be stronger, healthier and happier, and then making those changes happen. It is about taking charge and not letting the winds of fate control your lives. “Yes,” you say. “Where do I begin? What do I work on? How am I going to save my marriage?” Well, your answers begin here.


I did something stupid, so my cousin and been searching net and she found something called the Second chance letter and so I wrote one and gave him when he came to pick up some of his clothing. I wrote it just as explained, saw a sample and did it that way, In the beginning I put that I accepted the break up and then apologize that I didn’t showed that I appreciated him and then the part stating that good things been happening and someday would like to tell him about it but right now we both still needing space.
To begin the process, I recommend that you have what I call the Perfection Conversation with her. Essentially, you need to acknowledge to her that you are not perfect (in terms of how you’ve been behaving and treating her), but for the sake of your love, you are willing to continually make a serious effort to become a better man for her. In the same conversation, you also need to get her to acknowledge and realize that she is not perfect either.
My first ever boyfriend of 4 years plus broke up with me by saying “let’s just be friends”, “I don’t see a future with you anymore, I’ve tried but I just can’t.”, “You’ve to understand that it’s not you, it’s me. Even if you change, I’ll still be the same and eventually the same problem will unfold and we’ll quarrel again”. I’ve sent him threads of messages saying I’ll change and will be able to overlook issues and gradually hope that things will change for the better, but he seems to have made up his mind and wanna end this relationship with me.
Oddly enough, many of my clients were successful in re-establishing contact with their ex boyfriends by simply not even trying.  They didn’t do anything except move forward with their lives, focusing on bettering themselves personally and professionally.  In a way, it is a form of what I call Passive No Contact or Passive Radio Silence.  It works for some people.  They figure that if their boyfriend dropped them, then so be it and instead of becoming dependent and addicted to their ex boyfriend, they choose to embrace other things in their life, doing those things they want to do and accomplish. Then as they focus on those things and have success, often times their ex boyfriends show up realizing they made a huge mistake letting their girlfriend go.
If you want your relationship to get back on track, then you need to be humble and accepting what happened. You can’t get your ex boyfriend back by pointing fingers at him. You have to be humble throughout the whole discussion as this is the best approach to tackle this situation, and it will make your ex comfortable with you which will mend broken hearts.

The truth is, even though YOU may seem to fight constantly with your spouse, you might find it’s not that hard to completely turn things around and save your marriage. It’s not that hard (if you know how to do it) to actually stop fighting and  start loving each other again! It seems like a miracle, but it is true. Even your sex life can recover – it’s not as hard as you might think. Boy, I have said that a lot, huh? “It’s not that hard to save your marriage.”

You have the attraction back by this point already from the previous steps, so most of what you need to do now is just get out of your own way, and let the getting-back-together process happen on its own. In other words, you need to know what mistakes to AVOID, to prevent yourself from sabotaging the getting-back-together process, which is supposed to happen fairly naturally after the first 7 steps.
Hey,I'm so excited my broken Marriage has been restored & my husband is back after he left me and our 2 kids for another woman. After 8 years of marriage, me and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me and moved to California to be with another woman. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart. my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, I was really upset and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across Priest Elijah he can help get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!! So that was how he came back the next day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before,All thanks to Priest Elijah. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Priest Elijah is a real and very powerful spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the times of trouble, if you are here and you need your Ex back or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster now. Here’s his contact: Email him at: Effectivelovespell1 @gmail. com , you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2347067136561
In the dating world, before a guy asks a woman to go out with him, he knows he has to give her a reason to say yes. He has to give her some attention, show her he is interested in her, behave like someone she might like to be with. If a woman wants a man to ask her out, she has to give him a reason to ask by showing interest in him. And if she does the asking, she has to give him a reason to say yes. This principle also applies in marriage, especially when the relationship is in trouble. That person may be your spouse, but that isn’t enough of a reason for him/her to want to be around you. In a perfect world it might be. But in this imperfect world everyone needs help from their spouse to maintain attraction and interest.
My ex and I broke up a few weeks ago because he started hanging out with new friends that I never liked because they are all bad boys. After 2 years and 6 months in the relationship he suddenly changed his mind about us. He started texting other girls which he said was his friends he even had pictures of them on his phone. I didn’t like that at all because I saw that these girls are starting to like him. So basically it was my fault he broke up with me for being insecure, clingy and not trusting him. He told me he doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship right now but he still loves me. He wants to explore life without a girlfriend and not wanting to hurt me when he meet up with new girls and such. I really do love him with all my heart, and maybe he just needs some space to think, or maybe our relationship got a bit boring. I am so willing to follow these steps to get him back, I’m so not going to lose him to a bunch of girls!

I went out with my ex girlfriend for 9years an have 3 wonderful kids with her we had our ups an downs the last 2 years were mostly downs an a lot of fighting we really weren’t talking so she broke up with me for about 7-8 months I did the whole crying asking her for that one chance trying to keep my family together she is really my first love I know what I did wrong an I’m trying to change an understand what I’ve done wrong well we both move out of the place we lived together she went back with her mother an I got my own place I still love her but I just found out she started dating just dating an I’ve seen a couple of women but I still have strong feelings for her she won’t talk to me an when she does she gets angry quick she gets jealous when I say I’m with a friend an she turns around an try’s to make me jealous in return why would she do that I just wanna know if I still have a chance what can I do an if I don’t should I just move on please help


My boyfriend n i were in an amazing relationship.. he was totally crazy about me.. it was my fault.. we were fighting too much n i hurt him a lot due to the stress i was going through these past few months.. then one day he just left me n said that he can’t do it anymore.. i went extremes to make him stay..i begged.. cried.. hurt myself but it was no use.. he almost hated me.. then i had no contact with him for almost a month.. now just like 2 days ago.. i talked to him as a friend.. he said he missed me and when i asked him about all the gifts n drawings i gave him.. he said he is still keeping all of it..but he also said he got no feelings or even wanna be in a relationship.. he says he feels good being the way he is now.. i can’t control my feelings.. i admitted to him that i still love him n I’ll wait for him..but towards him.. I’ll just be a friend until he feels smtg for me.. i seriously want him back.. but i don’t know how.. he is being so stubborn with his decision..

Broke up with girlfriend after over 2 years together. We had some issues and had been to relate but finished counselling positively. Change of job had me move towns. She followed me 2 months later when she also had new job. My job fell apart and I had to quit just as she relocated. I then got work elsewhere on temporary basis but it went on for 9 weeks. We barely saw each other saw each other. I felt pulled work wise away from her and I allowed it to happen. We split. I was in denial for a month or so. When realisation hit I was heartbroken. I’ve tried emailing to say I want to get back together but she’s said she’s not in love with me and we have no future and that she wants space to heal.. I love her so much. I’ve written a heartfelt apology for hurting her but she won’t respond. I just don’t know what to do. I think she’s built up her barriers and is determined to put me in a box and ignore me. What do I do? I’m so very sad, really love her and can see all the ways we could have a really good relationship but if are doesn’t….


Act like nothing is wrong. Even if your guts are tumbling like clothes in a washing machine, try not to let her know. She's probably not going to want you back if you're acting depressed, mopey, or sulky. Make sure you're laughing and genuinely trying to have a good time. You might find that you've become a happier person along the way. If you are feeling depressed, surround yourself with friends or family. Don't wait alone in a corner and just hope for her to come back to you.
I got a problem. can someone help?my boyfriend and i were together for 6 years. he has always had a drinking problem all his life.( including his family) we lived together for 3 years. last year he couldnt afford to help pay his share of the rent n bills.(he also has never had a steady job!) he had no choice but to move to another town 20 min away with 2 other guys. this was last july. since then, i seem to be makeing up excuses at times not to drive up to see him only because,for one i pay 4 his prepaid phone n he never seems to anwser so i never know if he is home or not,(lives on the 3rd floor) when he does pick up he is either drunk with his buddies or stoned,(he is very ignorant n loud when he is drunk or stoned) he says he wouldnt have to drink or smoke if i was up there.!! Im trying to teach him a lesson= call me to come over n make sure u are not high or drunk!! so am i wrong to do that? he also says i run my mouth n talk s^%$ alot. i only run my mouth to make him realize what he is doing to hurt me n the mess hes causing in our so-called relationship. past few wks he has only called every other 4 or 5 days to say he is at his moms working. Should i make more of an effort to go up 2 see him out of the blue? Or should he step up and show me he still wants me by quitting his drinking n partying? oh ya, this guy is 31 years old. a grown man.
My ex and I broke up a few weeks ago because he started hanging out with new friends that I never liked because they are all bad boys. After 2 years and 6 months in the relationship he suddenly changed his mind about us. He started texting other girls which he said was his friends he even had pictures of them on his phone. I didn’t like that at all because I saw that these girls are starting to like him. So basically it was my fault he broke up with me for being insecure, clingy and not trusting him. He told me he doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship right now but he still loves me. He wants to explore life without a girlfriend and not wanting to hurt me when he meet up with new girls and such. I really do love him with all my heart, and maybe he just needs some space to think, or maybe our relationship got a bit boring. I am so willing to follow these steps to get him back, I’m so not going to lose him to a bunch of girls!
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