There are some who think that marriage is inviolable. Different religions may forbid or discourage divorce. It was thought once that the public interest demanded that divorce be made difficult, so that children would not be left homeless. In New York State, divorce was only possible in the context of infidelity, and so men and women would routinely perjure themselves and defame themselves in order to get a divorce. But it is not that way in New York anymore; and divorce has generally become more acceptable. But divorce, like any other serious relationship, is rarely ended without emotional distress.
So my ex broke up with me a week ago (we had only been dating for two months but apparently it was his longest relationship in awhile) and we’ve been in contact almost every day for the past week just talking as friends so that we don’t lose our snapchat streak (I know that’s a stupid reason to keep in contact with someone). He already drunk texted me saying that he made a mistake but when I confronted him about it the next day he remembered what he said just fine but said he couldn’t get back together because he “needed to work on himself first”. I feel awful starting the “4 week no contact rule” since we’ve been chatting for so long but I really want him back. What do I do?
Good question! There really are so many angles to cover in this day and age. I guess technically opening a snapchat doesn’t count as making “contact,” but I also just don’t think it’s a good idea. I also recognize how hard it is to fight the temptation and not open it. So my advice would be to send him a quick message if he sends you snapchats being like, “I really need some time for myself right now and would appreciate it if you wouldn’t contact me,” and then don’t respond further if he does keep reaching out. And if you can be really strong, then ignore the snapchats. Hope this helps!
Start over. Click the reset button. Whatever he did wrong – get over it. Forgive yourself if you've made mistakes and forgive him, you are both guilty in one way or another, and reminding each other about it won't help. You can't get back together if you are enemies, so stay close to each other by forgiving. Let the past go. Every day is a new opportunity for you to have a better life with a great guy, maybe it's him – and now that you're starting over, you've learned from your mistakes, but you can continue on only when you manage to forgive.
Come up with a list together. While discussing your relationship, work on a list together. Figure out what you both think the problems are in your relationship, and discuss how it started. It may be hard to have an open discussion, but it's important to get both of your points of view on where the relationship went wrong. In addition, you can use help from educational websites to help identify what's healthy about your relationship and what's not.
Interpret your emotions. In the pain and confusion of a breakup, it can be easy to confuse your emotions, interpreting feelings of loneliness and hurt as evidence that you need your ex back in your life. In fact, almost everyone who experiences a breakup initially feels remorse for the lost relationship, coupled with feelings of anxiety, guilt, depression, and loneliness. Generally, the more serious the relationship was, the more severe these feelings tend to be; couples who are married or cohabiting tend to have the worst breakups, whereas those who were casually dating tend to have an easier time in the aftermath of a breakup. But the severity of your feelings does not automatically mean that you should get back together with your ex.
Now the remaining part of this website will show you psychological and practical strategies for how to get your ex-boyfriend back that you can work with to remove the feelings of neediness and insecurity. It doesn’t matter how dreadful you are feeling inside you these strategies will surely reverse the feeling of rejection that your ex boyfriend wants you to feel. This will shift the balance of power back in your relationship.
You sound like you have Borderline Personality Disorder…..how do I know this? Because I have it too. Unless you are just really young and this is your very first relationship and you haven’t a clue how to act. Seriously though, look up BPD and see if you have any of the other symptoms….and if you do, go get diagnosed and get some therapy and meds…..it helps !
please save my relationship with my boyfriend of 13 years now we have a child. i need your prayer so strong some people are interfering in our relationship telling him that i’m not good enough for him and they were not there when we were struggling . now since these problems started he is not getting the write job, he borrows money every where he is not even aware he is messing up his life.i love him we all make mistakes but all of us deserve to be loved by the write people.i trust that God will help me cause i pray for him everyday he is a good person i know him.but these people are helping him destroy his life. he no longer visits his family,his mother had a stroke and he cant even support her. those people who say i’m wrong for him their lives are bad they want him marry someone who left him long ago go and get married because she is educated ,they even told the woman to give him a child he will be hers and she did. my problem is they are doing it for the write reasons they want the guy because they think he will marry her what about me i also want to get married she choose another man @least she got married.the girl new i was there she started by sending him massages telling him that she is sorry that has been going on for 6 years its only now that he responded so his distant family took him and told him that they r going to see a friend that’s when it started pray for our relationship in the name of the father,the son and the holly spirit amen.