Even though every relationship has its ups and downs, successful couples have learned how to manage the bumps and keep their love life going, says marriage and family therapist Mitch Temple, author of The Marriage Turnaround. They hang in there, tackle problems, and learn how to work through the complex issues of everyday life. Many do this by reading self-help books and articles, attending seminars, going to counseling, observing other successful couples, or simply using trial and error.
When things are rocky, having sex or performing acts that pleasure your partner are not always in the cards. But even if you're not in the mood at the moment, there's hope if you actually still want to connect intimately, according to Rachel Russo. She says wanting to have sex even when you are struggling with a relationship, shows that you are deeply bonded to your partner. "If it feels unnatural to withhold sex even when things are rocky, it can indicate that you are thinking about what is best for the relationship in the long term," says Russo. "If you don't want to deprive your marriage of the intimate connection, it is a sign that you really care about each other and want to make the marriage work."
Me and my ex were together for 4 and a half months. She mentioned a while ago when a guy messaged her that they had a thing before me and her but she assured me that it was the past. Apparently not. She broke up with me because I don’t have a job and I’m apparently lazy. I smoke cigarettes and weed and I am forcing myself to quit these things and I feel like its the only chance of getting her back. Ive also been looking suuuper hard.for a job, but it isnt easy when youre17. This guy that she had a thing with before us is now going all out to try and snatch her up. She broke up with me a week ago and I got information from her friend that she has already gone out on 2 dates with him… that hit me like a train. As soon as I heard that I bursted into tears. She seems like the type to come back after a while but im just not sure because she mentioned that she just doesnt feel the same way about me as she did before, the “butterflies” are missing. I will do anything in my power to get her back because what i dont think she realises is that I am the one who actually cares about her and loves her and this other guy just wants sex. I am way too attatched to this girl and she has such a huge part of my heart and its killing me that she left me so suddenly. :( I REALLY need your help…
St. Jude I ask that you find it in your heart to pray for me and my boyfriends Jorge relationship. I ask that you take away any temptations that Jorge may have or remove any other individual that will come between our relationship. Help Jorge to be aware of how much I care and love him. I ask that you help our relationship be strong, loving, honest, and respectful. Please help Jorge love me with all his heart and soul. In the name of the father the son and the holy spirit. AMEN
Understand the breakup. What did each of you do to contribute to the breakup? Most relationship troubles do not crop up unexpectedly, but build up over time. The odds are good that it wasn't a one-sided problem and that there were signs that it was coming. Take some time and do some soul searching before you attempt to get your ex back. You want to make sure you are not wasting your time or energy on something futile.
When you go out or have new experiences, take pictures of your new and improved appearance. When you’re doing your favourite things, take a picture. You can also take pictures with your friends. Be happy. Then post on social media like instagram or facebook. This will help you attract new friends too! Your ex may or may not see these photos. Who cares? You’re enjoying yourself and you will attract more like-minded people. But please don’t post too much. Posting once every two days is a good amount to not annoy others while showing your amazing life.
After the breakup I did the whole crazy ex girlfriend thing then just stopped talking to him completely for 3months. We started talking again when we both turned up at our club unexpectantly and I apologised and asked him to hang out. But, I didnt feel like he was hearing me so I full on lost it a few times. And now we are back to not talking for a month now but we still see each other around at our club. I’d also made the mistake of telling him that I wanted to start the relationship from scratch and he baulked at that.
So I went back to doing what I was doing. I focused on myself, I had fun, I spent time with friends, I did a lot of writing, I traveled, I discovered so many things about myself. I felt happier and better than ever before, all the pieces in my life were finally clicking … and then at the very end of the summer, he reached out to me and after hours of talking, he asked me out. Our first date was seven hours long and we got married a year to the day later!
For example:- Things were all OK before. One day you ended up talking to your ex in a casual manner. You did not have anything in mind which was bad. It was a casual conversation let it be a text or a call. Let it be after many years or months. From that day your partner started behaving weirdly. Even after telling you everything was fine. In this situation, your partner acted in a way where everything seems to be fine. But that was not the case. He/she felt bad when you talked to your Ex and trust issues built up. So try to get deep into the problem of What Went Wrong. Some things might be right from your side but not your partner's side.
Be honest with each other. Being honest is a kind of vulnerability, and by being honest with your partner, you show that you trust him or her. Try opening up about what you're thinking and feeling. When you're vulnerable, you're inviting your partner in and asking him or her to be equally as honest. However, it's important to continue using "I" statements to tell how you feel instead of blaming the other person.
“Sabrina! I followed your advice and got my ex back and would love to share my story. He broke up with me last year in April after being together for about a year and a half. When he broke up with me I kept it together and didn’t cry and was understanding of his decision, I kind of knew it was coming. Of course, I broke down as soon as I left his house. He was even crying when I left. Anyway, I decided to go completely no contact. We were still friends on Facebook because we didn’t want to leave things on bad terms. I was really focused on doing my best to move on and live my life. After seven weeks of no contact, he reached out to me. I didn’t make it too easy because I wanted him to work a bit, and I was also trying to move on. Eventually, we decided to meet up and ended up having a three-hour conversation. It was a really good one and we talked about what we were looking for and he was very understanding of what I needed and the reasons it ended at all. That was almost a year ago and we are still together. And while we still have our issues and are trying to work through things, it’s definitely so much better than it was the first time around. I think holding myself together and absolutely no contact was the key!”
I’ve been with my girlfriend for over a year, and she just broke up with me because she seems to care more about her friends than she does our relationship. she wont make time for me and ever sinse we split she refuses to talk to me. I’m heartbroken completely. because we used to be perfect. how do i get her to speak to me again even though she doesnt want to, i need her, please help!
honestly I did not show appreciation to my ex while we together. I missed valentines day and his birthday. when I decided to make the best of times with him it was to late. then I asked him for closure and he came talked in person. I told what if I got therapy because there is something going on that effects my relationships. he told its been three weeks and I’m over you….. I cried of course then looked at him and said I feel better. just got sick of being sad, doesn’t mean I’m over him. but its step. then I told me what was really going on and told he’s proud of me said I’m strong person and good girl. he told me to feel free to talk to him and said he wont be jerk to me. he also wants to improve. it sucks that I was to occupied with other stuff in life that i didn’t learn to understand him but oh well. that doesn’t mean has feelings for me. sadly I cant live in world that revolves around him I must create my own world and keeping living up to my goals. this relationship may have been painful but helped realize what I need. we are blind from pain because only look at the bad qualities that it brings us but we all need realize its actually beautiful because it shapes us. I’m going to embrace it this break up..
I use to date a married woman (i know for some people is bad) she has her own reason and she will ask him for divorce. Even her sisters knows me. Lately we broke up she said she no more have feelings for me while she use to kill herself just to see me. When we were together she felt so happy and free and super honest with me. Something changed I don’t know what but I absolutely love her and want her back. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to got her back. Any help plz
My girl broke up with me over 3 months ago, i did the no contact and contact her after 30 days and we caught up for coffee. We have been going on couple dates but recently she has been dating another guy. She still has feelings she says but does not want to jeopardize her new relationship because she is afraid of the other guy finding out that she is still talking and hanging with her ex. what can you conclude?
please save my relationship with my boyfriend of 13 years now we have a child. i need your prayer so strong some people are interfering in our relationship telling him that i’m not good enough for him and they were not there when we were struggling . now since these problems started he is not getting the write job, he borrows money every where he is not even aware he is messing up his life.i love him we all make mistakes but all of us deserve to be loved by the write people.i trust that God will help me cause i pray for him everyday he is a good person i know him.but these people are helping him destroy his life. he no longer visits his family,his mother had a stroke and he cant even support her. those people who say i’m wrong for him their lives are bad they want him marry someone who left him long ago go and get married because she is educated ,they even told the woman to give him a child he will be hers and she did. my problem is they are doing it for the write reasons they want the guy because they think he will marry her what about me i also want to get married she choose another man @least she got married.the girl new i was there she started by sending him massages telling him that she is sorry that has been going on for 6 years its only now that he responded so his distant family took him and told him that they r going to see a friend that’s when it started pray for our relationship in the name of the father,the son and the holly spirit amen.