I dated my girlfriend for 8yrs. We broke up one year ago but kept trying to get back together. She just officially dumped me a couple of weeks ago. Her reasons were that I took too long to change my ways and that she didn’t know what she wanted right now. I still keep trying to show her that I love her more than anything. All she does all day long is work and go to college classes. I feel that there is still a small chance that it will work between us. Our past fights were always about my job, I was insensitive, too much partying, not paying attention to her needs and that she wanted me to better myself. Her birthday is coming up and I bought her a gift. Is that bad? I don’t know what I should do. I really need some help. I love this girl and I don’t want almost nine years to go down the toilet. I did change my ways by the way. I’m also applying for a good job. Hopefully I get it. We lived together and now I live with my sister for the time being. So I say again what advise do u give me.
me and my ex boyfriend recently broke up about a month ago. Currently I am trying the no contact rule, but it’s impossible for me not to see him due to the fact we attend the same workplace. Also we share the same close friends, so sometimes when out with friends he’s there and at parties, but we never speak at all during them. A few days after the break up, I wrote him a letter appolising and asking if we could be friends (I think this was a bad idea to do this and I got no reply or anything from him). Also I wrote in the letter that I was okay with his decision to break up, but I wasn’t. In a few weeks I want to try and contact him and speak as friends. I would prefer to do this via text as he ignores every call, and as soon as he sees me in person he gets as far away as possible. I just don’t know want to say to him after this no contact period, or how to get him to want to talk to me. Could you please help me or give me any advice at all. I would really really appreciate it and be really grateful.
You may worry about the old adage, “Out of sight, out of mind,” and use that as a justification to reach out. The thought of him moving on and forgetting about you is too terrifying to bear. One little text won’t hurt, you reason. But, in this instance, it will hurt. If you want your ex back, it is important that you strictly adhere to the no contact rule. 
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