There is a notion out there that relationships are hard and filled with struggle. And while I concede that there will be times when disagreements will arise or less than pleasurable situations may happen that need to be dealt with, that’s not the kind of struggle I’m talking about. I’m talking about the notion that there needs to be a tug of war between two people … that you need to try with all your might and then maybe the guy will see the light and come over to your side.

So…I had been in a few relationships earlier but they were not too serious and were so immature. Then for a long period of about 3 years…I was single and I was quite enjoying my life. I met this guy at a concert and felt attracted…and before we can proceed, the very next day he proposed me. I knew that this was mere attraction so I declined and told him what I felt. But then.. After some days..I felt I needed him and so we came into relationship. He had a previous relationship with a girl for 2 years with which he didn’t felt attached. And so…he had approached me. Well our relationship was obviously a non serious one at initial stages…but as we proceeded…he started falling for me …even I felt the same. He said he was glad to find me ..and that I changed his life for better… It was all like a sweet dream till 5 months. He was too serious..he even planned everything about our future…and introduced me to his family. Obviously we had a few differences on some matters but we always ended up being together. And then one day… I found him flirting with a random girl on social site…I bit of overreacted..and all was a mess…and he asked for second chances… I said I needed time…and he said no he will prefer being single…and I said ok.
When things are rocky, having sex or performing acts that pleasure your partner are not always in the cards. But even if you're not in the mood at the moment, there's hope if you actually still want to connect intimately, according to Rachel Russo. She says wanting to have sex even when you are struggling with a relationship, shows that you are deeply bonded to your partner. "If it feels unnatural to withhold sex even when things are rocky, it can indicate that you are thinking about what is best for the relationship in the long term," says Russo. "If you don't want to deprive your marriage of the intimate connection, it is a sign that you really care about each other and want to make the marriage work."
When you go out or have new experiences, take pictures of your new and improved appearance. When you’re doing your favourite things, take a picture. You can also take pictures with your friends. Be happy. Then post on social media like instagram or facebook. This will help you attract new friends too! Your ex may or may not see these photos. Who cares? You’re enjoying yourself and you will attract more like-minded people. But please don’t post too much. Posting once every two days is a good amount to not annoy others while showing your amazing life.
Thanks so much for this. I broke up with my boyfriend and want him back. We just kept arguing i was jealous.. he said he only had eyes for me me and i was the love of his life. It has hurt him so much i know.. but im so willing to change.. i followed your tips i look great, have fun and he still looks at me like i am the one but says sex with no emotional strings is how he wants to do it for now as he is still hurting and probablyv thinks ill do it all again..but i won’t.I hope he comes back totally.. at the moment im working on trying to get him tovstart taking me to his local bar with him again.. we went all the time before. im taking itvslowly anyway. I never want to hurt him again
A while back I was dating someone and it always seemed that we would fight over the silliest things. Now, I like to think that I am generally a calm person but for whatever reason my girlfriend and I would always fight. So, I went to the most trusted of friends for advice, my dad. He explained to me that a relationship is like a bank account. Every time you have a good experience or something of that nature you are putting money into the account. However, every time you have an argument or a fight you are taking money out of the account. The key thing here is to have more green deposits than red withdrawals in your relationship bank account.
My boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me 3 weeks ago. He said he did not want to be in a committed relationship anymore. He just wants to be single and see what’s out there. How can you say those things to someone you’ve been with for 4 years?! 3 weeks later, he called me yesterday at 4am. I missed it because I left my phone in the car. I called him today and he said he didn’t remember calling me because he was really drunk. I asked him to meet up for catch up tomorrow and he agreed. I am going to follow this site’s advice: be positive and just have fun. But is there still a chance for us to getting back together? I still love him so much but I feel like he’s made up his mind to be single. I’m so confused and depressed.
I was this person for 4 years. When he meet me I had a daughter from a prevues relationship he accepted her as his own , which was good , but then we had a son together 2 years later. Any way when went through a lot of sh*t together he wet to jail and no one was their to help him in the time of need but me. I love this man with all my heart and soul . I know that he loves me because he told me so .i also have a mother who gets to involved in my relationship with him he is tired of it now . Plus I broke his trust my talking to male friends . I want him back but I don’t know how to got about it. I told him I wanted a family with him but he says no . I am heart broken now. I gave him space and we wind up having sex , afterwords I felt bad because I have feeling for him and I told him I wanted t be with him . Am lost and don’t know what to don’t.
I really like the links from the first comment. I think as long as the two people love each other it doesn't matter what they did. unless its cheating. Trust is hard for me to understand. MY bf doesn't trust me and even though he has done things to break my trust in different ways I feel like I know him and can understand he's just a human and we make some mistakes sometimes. I try and change how he wants me to, to be a better person and show him I do care but somehow its not ever enough. I do not know how I can show him I care. He wants a big grand gesture but I do not have money or an idea of what to do. He said something like seeing him at work would make him feel like I care but when I didn't do u it his time limit that I didn't even know about he got mad. I just want to show him he is special but every little thing doesn't mean anything to him anymore. I can say I felt like how he describes because he hurt me and I didn't care about anything but distressing helped me see more clearly and what I needed to. I think that's what's going on with him because he hasn't been able to distress.
We’ve added many techniques on how to work on your inner state of being, because advice is great, but in order to lead a harmonious life you need to have the resources that will help you. We add self-work techniques to complement the instructions on how to get your girlfriend back, so that you feel competent and sure of yourself. We know how important it is to be happy with yourself! Additionally, through years of consultations, we learned how it is possible to influence your girlfriend through people who are close to her, and this material can be found in the new edition of the book.
When I started dating my boyfriend we both fell hard and fast, I quickly learned that he was very insecure and could not be alone. He was drinking a lot and one day he would be the best person I could ever ask for and the next he would say horrible things to tear away at my self esteem. I started looking for job opportunities to move close to him, when that finally worked out I learned that he had been seeing someone else behind my back. I have tried to move on and date others but each time they want to get close I just couldn’t, I would feel as though I am cheating and then realize that I really don’t want someone else in my life, if he finds out that someone has an interest in me he makes accusations of me moving on and not caring about him. He will text me during the day when I know that the other guy is at work but as soon as it is the end of the work day he will no longer reply. It’s like he wants to live his life with someone else but also make certain that I am still there and committed to him. He will make accusations that he knows I’m seeing someone else or that I’m sleeping around when I’m not, I don’t know if that’s him just trying to feel good about the choices he has made to do just that. I can’t let go of the many words of encouragement that he has given me even with all of the hurtful ones he has made. It’s so hard to just quit loving someone that I have loved more than anyone. I’m reaching out trying to make friends in my new home but I can’t stop thinking about him all day every day. I wish I knew how to get him to feel what he felt when we first met, to see how I have always been there and committed to him. Whenever he needs help I am always there and I feel if I say no then he would have no need to stay connected with me and I just don’t want to lose him.
Apologize. Think deeply about anything you did or didn't do that somehow contributed to the downfall of the relationship, and clean the slate by giving your ex a proper apology. Take full responsibility for the offense, without blaming your ex, giving excuses, or expecting an apology (or even forgiveness) in return. It may very well be that your ex contributed to the situation, but you cannot apologize for someone else; you can only apologize for yourself. Leave him or her out of it and odds are the apology will be reciprocated.
Or you can say something like: "You may not like it, but most of what I do now, I do it for you. You've made a better person. I understand what it means to care for someone now that I've been with you. I want to share that with you again, this time better. Because I can't deny that I still have feelings for you. I'd be lying to myself and lying to the world."
If a couple works at being together and trying to understand each other, they may well succeed. I have to admit I feel a little uncertain about this matter. I think if a relationship can be made to work, each person should give it a good try. On the other hand, I don’t think anyone should settle for someone who has to be coaxed into caring for him or her. (c) Fredric Neuman.  Follow Dr. Neuman's blog at fredricneumanmd.com/blog or ask advice at fredricneumanmd.com/blog/ask-dr-neuman-advice-column/
My experience includes helping people restore relationships that lasted several months, or several years. Yes, each is different and we carefully considered such differences in our course.Often, women doubt their decisions and find themselves in an inner conflict. Your relationship could have many different problems – anything from the weariness of a common daily routine, habitual nagging, or problems with parents. We have experience in counseling and restoring relationships in such difficult situations, and we are going to share it with you in this book.
Ever get a whiff of your husband's cologne, or signature tomato sauce and feel warm and fuzzy? Savor that moment and use it, says Spencer. "Scent is the one sense tied most closely to our emotional memories, so if his cologne, or salty after-gym smell still has positive connotations to you, that's good news." Spencer says it's almost as if your nose is telling you that, deep down, your brain still puts him in the 'he's a good one' category. "It's worth looking for whether this feels true in your day to day life as well."
Please pray with me and help my handsome man let go of his anger and find the love for US, we once had.. Our struggles have been tearing us apart. I pray I can make the changes I need to, for him, myself and for us. My heart is broken knowing he’s so upset, and I’m unable to fix it right now. I feel I have become such a disappointment to him, and I just want him to know how much I love him and want our bond back, to feel close and to feel safe in each other’s arms again. I pray his anger can be replaced with love and happiness the way we are meant to be.
You know something is wrong if you are always crying or feeling bad about what has happened and you can quite get over it.  You also know it can be frustrating when you can seem to figure out what to text or what to say to your ex bf.  Well, the solution is you can join my Private Facebook Support Group and/or pick up your copy of the Texting Bible and get the emotional support and answers your need.
St. Jude I ask that you find it in your heart to pray for me and my boyfriends relationship. I ask that you take away any temptation my boyfriend may have or remove any other individual that will come between our relationship. Help him to be aware of how much I care and love him. I ask that you help our relationship be strong, loving, honest, and respectful. In the name of the father the son and the holy spirit. AMEN –
Plus, it gives you the time to get past the initial unbearable phase of missing him and into a more even-tempered, secure mentality. Instead of trying to figure out signs your ex still loves you, you’ll be working on yourself and getting yourself into a better mindset. It gives you the space to say, “I don’t need him to be happy – I can be happy all on my own”.

Me and my ex were together for 4 and a half months. She mentioned a while ago when a guy messaged her that they had a thing before me and her but she assured me that it was the past. Apparently not. She broke up with me because I don’t have a job and I’m apparently lazy. I smoke cigarettes and weed and I am forcing myself to quit these things and I feel like its the only chance of getting her back. Ive also been looking suuuper hard.for a job, but it isnt easy when youre17. This guy that she had a thing with before us is now going all out to try and snatch her up. She broke up with me a week ago and I got information from her friend that she has already gone out on 2 dates with him… that hit me like a train. As soon as I heard that I bursted into tears. She seems like the type to come back after a while but im just not sure because she mentioned that she just doesnt feel the same way about me as she did before, the “butterflies” are missing. I will do anything in my power to get her back because what i dont think she realises is that I am the one who actually cares about her and loves her and this other guy just wants sex. I am way too attatched to this girl and she has such a huge part of my heart and its killing me that she left me so suddenly. :( I REALLY need your help…


My GF and I were together for close to a year. She broke up with me about 3 months ago. Our relationship was actually really good. We hadn’t had any real disagreements. We communicated really well. We were planning on living together. Then Oade a huge mistake. I lied to her about something huge and important. I did so because I let my ego and pride get in the way of my rational thinking. She has completely shut me out of her life. She has blocked me from her phone, email and FB. I did make all of the early breakup mistakes like pleading with her to take me back. Apologizing over and over. It finally dawned on me that I never let her know that I wasn’t taking her feelings into consideration. I let her know that I did after a short period of time. I have read several different get your ex back e-books. All of them do not seem very promising as I am a woman and I try to think about how I would react to some of the steps given. I have done the no contact step. I have written her a couple of letters apologizing again. The last letter I wrote I basically told her some things I loved about her, how I was angry that when the going got tough she ran and that I was saying goodbye and good luck to her. I just dropped it off so I have not received a response…if I get one at all. I do love her and I do want her back. I can honestly say she is the one for me. Some of my friends have given me the “there are other fish in the sea” speech. That’s not what I want. I want the one that I love back. I guess I’m looking for some more advice. Anything I have missed in this whole process. Thanks head of time for any advice given. I do really appreciate it.
I am blessed with the man I have by my side and I think like he is more than what I would have Imagined. Since the beginning, I have felt that it is a relationship brought by God. Lately, there has been a lot of overhinking on my side which has caused anxiety, fears and doubts. I cry thinking that i have to break up with him, and there is NO reason why. I pray that God turns this story around and keeps on blessing us on th epath that we are taking. We have been saving ourselves for marriage, and it has been two years with a lot of love. I pray that Saint Jude will intercede for us and remove all of my doubts and fears so I can enjoy the relationship we have and keep persuing God through it.
I need advice. We met on match.com and only dated about 3 weeks but had a great connection from the very beginning. Plus we share a lot in common (we agree about a lot, graduated high school same year, kids are same age). But he broke it off because 1) we moved too fast (didn’t have sex but went further than we intended by date 2) and 2) we’re in different places in our lives – I’m going through a divorce and he’s been divorced for years. I’m devastated. We ended things amicably last week (I didn’t fight it, though I wanted to) and we haven’t been in contact. But he’s been back on match.com already. My question is, what are our chances for trying again in the future? Did moving too fast derail us completely?
WOW I don’t “KNOW” you…But I really like you! ?You are HILARIOUS and REAL and it’s clear that you’ve truly been “there” before by the things that you say. It’s like your taking these feelings and thoughts straight from MY mind and typing them out. I LOVE what you stand for (and what you don’t stand for). Well my question is in the last paragraph from what’s above, when you say something like : after getting your ex back he will eventually SHOW you (if we took your advice about showing we’re not putting up with the bs) that the break-up was a good thing.- Are you saying you feel they’ll still be the same way they were BEFORE the breakup (a f*cktard?) or they will possibly have changed for the better due to us setting those “what’s not acceptable” boundaries? And do you always feel that they would ONLY want you back due to a wanting to be in control thing not ever because they actually love you? Just wondering
Where did I come up with this? Actually this really happened to me. I was dating a girl and after we broke up I happened to run into her at a Starbucks and even though we had a short friendly conversation I couldn’t take my eyes off of her because she just looked so gorgeous. She looked so good in fact that all I could think was “how in the hell did I let her get away?”
Johnny Cassell was pivotal in my decision to travel 5000 miles to establish a relationship I had completely misunderstood. His advice provided unfounded insight that I allowed my ego to overlook. Whether you are confident or not…this highly calm, collective and intelligent expert in dating can make you realise the answers to your relationship troubles. Consider him the best friend, confidante or muse in your life.
Im a lesbian and was with this girl for four years going 5 on july.she ask space for 3months no communication,no seeing each other so I gave her space but i broke my promise not to call,text and see her. I called her 12 times and ive been texting her also.and worst thing i did, iwent to her office so she saw me and ask what are you doing here, i told her i miss you i wanna see you.and i also ask her when she will come back and if she still love me. I keep on forcing her to answer until she pissed. So i went home and received text messages ftom her saying im not happy with what you did. I starting to hate you and you ask me if i still love you no i dont love you anymore. Now i dont know what to do? I dont wanna lose her.. pleasehelp me what to do not to lose her and to love me again..please
If you think that by being friends with your ex, you can stay in their lives and hopefully get back together again, you are just plain wrong. By being friends you are not giving yourself and your ex enough time and space to heal. Not to mention, you will probably end up getting friendzoned by your ex. You could end up listening to your ex complaining about their new lovers (cue : Ex-girlfriends)  or they might propose being friends with benefits (cue: Ex-boyfriends).
When I was a medical student I was walking along Third Ave one evening and stopped to argue with a friend of mine, at the same time leaning against a doorway, which suddenly swung in precipitating me down a couple of steps into a weird hallway. Odd decorations were hanging all along the wall, evidently for sale. I only remember a used toilet seat which had a price on it of thirty dollars, quite a lot of money back then. Anyway, this place turned out to be some sort of shop, although there was no sign anywhere. The proprietor was a fat, unkempt woman who had a cigarette dangling from her mouth. She took one look at me and said that what I needed was a "love potion." I needed something, I knew, so I ordered the love potion, which was not as expensive as the toilet seat-- but cost too much, I told her. She got mad and muttering took the potion back.
I went out with my ex girlfriend for 9years an have 3 wonderful kids with her we had our ups an downs the last 2 years were mostly downs an a lot of fighting we really weren’t talking so she broke up with me for about 7-8 months I did the whole crying asking her for that one chance trying to keep my family together she is really my first love I know what I did wrong an I’m trying to change an understand what I’ve done wrong well we both move out of the place we lived together she went back with her mother an I got my own place I still love her but I just found out she started dating just dating an I’ve seen a couple of women but I still have strong feelings for her she won’t talk to me an when she does she gets angry quick she gets jealous when I say I’m with a friend an she turns around an try’s to make me jealous in return why would she do that I just wanna know if I still have a chance what can I do an if I don’t should I just move on please help
We ran into each other randomly about five years later. I was stunned to see him (he was in my house of all places, someone brought him to a party there and he had no idea he’d be seeing me!). I could barely speak I was so nervous. We chatted for a bit, then he messaged me on Facebook a few days later and we talked for hours and hours, I was positive that this was the beginning of round two for us, but then he went dark again. A few more years went by and we ran into each other again. Once again I had soaring high hopes… and then was crushed again when nothing came of it (I found out later he had a girlfriend at the time).
I just broke up with my girlfriend yesterday…. She left me because I lied to her about me going out and drinking with my friends…. This isnt the first time I’m doing this to her… It’s not that I don’t love her….I feel so disgusted for what I have done…. I don’t wanna lose her…. I just don’t know how I’m gonna ignore her cause I meet her everyday in school…. Can anyone help me out
Congratulations on taking the first steps to making your relationship great again! Read the reviews of the great products that saved my marriage. If you want, sign up for the free series of articles I’ve put together into an email package (the form is below) and you can read more by clicking here: Marriage Advice. I don’t spam, I just send the articles. People have thanked me many times over for that collection.  You will be inspired. Good luck!  – Ed

WOW I don’t “KNOW” you…But I really like you! ?You are HILARIOUS and REAL and it’s clear that you’ve truly been “there” before by the things that you say. It’s like your taking these feelings and thoughts straight from MY mind and typing them out. I LOVE what you stand for (and what you don’t stand for). Well my question is in the last paragraph from what’s above, when you say something like : after getting your ex back he will eventually SHOW you (if we took your advice about showing we’re not putting up with the bs) that the break-up was a good thing.- Are you saying you feel they’ll still be the same way they were BEFORE the breakup (a f*cktard?) or they will possibly have changed for the better due to us setting those “what’s not acceptable” boundaries? And do you always feel that they would ONLY want you back due to a wanting to be in control thing not ever because they actually love you? Just wondering
Spend time with good friends. One of the best ways to source yourself is to put yourself in the company of good friends. Good friends remind you of who you really are. They can give you a new perspective on things and can generally be fun to be around. Good friends serve as one of the best distractions as opposed to eating a bucket of ice cream and watching Netflix all alone because they can help to build you up in the meantime and leave you more empowered, stronger, and more in touch with who you are. It might be worth it to define who good friends are.Good friends are friends that help you choose the most useful and empowering interpretation of your situation. They don’t look to blame or help you wallow in self-pity. They have compassion for you, yet believe that you are inherently fine. They remind you of how fun you are and how much life itself has to offer. Spending time with people like this will feed your soul. During this time take advantage of everything these wonderful people in your life have to offer. Plan a trip. See that show you all always wanted to see. Do all the things that make you feel alive and do it in good company.
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