When people explain to me why they stay in unsatisfactory relationships long past the point where family and friends and everyone else encourage them to leave, they often say, “I love him/her.” I know that that is the real reason. Love has evolved as a powerful device to keep people together despite any defect or deficiency of a partner. Nature requires them to stay together long enough to have children. But it is not a good reason. As more or less rational animals, we can make decisions that promote our own individual interests. People who are capable of falling in love once can fall in love again and again if that first relationship breaks apart. The issue each person has to decide in the midst of a bad marriage or a bad affair is whether it is possible to be happy in that relationship—and, really, whether it is possible to be happier with someone else. Unfortunately, the alternative that occurs to many is not another partner, it is loneliness.
I don’t know what to do. I met this guy. Stayed the night with him since DAY ONE. Five and a half years. It was an extremely rough relationship. Started fighting after six months. I couldn’t forgive him for all the bad things he had done to us. Lie after lie after lie. He went away for six months best the end of our relationship and we talked on the phone every single day. When he came back home, we both said that we would do whatever it takes to make things work for good. No arguing, etc. I couldn’t let go of the past and I started arguing with him about EVERYTHING. Especially if he even looked at another woman. Things got really really bad at the end. I started treating him like crap and didn’t care how I talked to him. After we broke up we still talked almost every day. He would still come over and be with me. But, I kept messing things up. I still would start arguments because I was afraid that he was putting other women above me. He’s dating one of our co workers now. And he moved in with her too. We’ve officially been separated for six and a half months now. He officially started dating her after I snapped at him one last time back in the beginning of February. I don’t feel the same tension that I did. I don’t feel the same hate anymore. I love him so much and I want him back. I got upset with him in the beginning of March and he teared up and told me that “I wanted it to be YOU!!!” But, he’s with this new chick. And he said that it’s a new relationship. How do I get him back? I know he loves me. I know it to be true. We all three work together but rarely do I see her anymore. Please, help me. I did the no contact rule for 30 days. April 2nd, before leaving work I apologized for being so selfish during the breakup and told him that I it makes me so happy to see him happy. He sincerely said “Thank you”. After he was shocked that is. After that day, we started having more laughs at work. Then I text him something funny the other day after we got off work and he responded “lol”. I haven’t heard from him since. I’m worried that he’s too happy and comfortable in his new relationship that I won’t be able to get him back into my personal life again. What am I to do?
It feels like not being able to breathe when a good man leaves you. He’s put up with me for so many years, i’m so sorry for everything. i fked up i was naggy, unappreciative, rude, and not available to him emotionally i was pushing him away he was such a sweet heart and i always found something to argue with him about i took what we had for granted we took a break for a while and decided to try again start from the beginning..we went out had fun and i fell into my old way got mad and argued about soemthing so stupid.
Your ideas seem great, but i feel like my situation may be a little different seeing as how my ex bf is different. Long story short, we had been dating for 9 months and I even lived with him for a bit when i was in between leases. We started getting into a lot of fights that came from his insecurities. He can be a bit short tempered at times as well, and one stupid fight that I caused turned into this big one. I definitely said some things that struck a nerve with him (i was pmsing at the time). So we decided to take a short break. I tried ending the break but he didnt seem ready in which i irrationally broke up with him thinking he didnt want to be with me. It was juvenile of me, I have so many regrets from it. He got mad blah blah blah, so we decided to just go back to taking a break.
I’d greatly appreciate feedback on my break up, especially from guys. I had been dating a guy for 6 weeks. Although he was following up and seeing me every weekend since our first date, he never mentioned exclusivity or “the talk” about “us.” So on date 7, he invited me over for dinner and made his move. I told him I was not ready as it is sonerhung you can’t take back and it would change our dynamic. The truth is I was ready, but needed to know where I stood with him as it is not something I am casual about. We ended up in his bed, but I stopped it short of the deed. He seemed ok with that and asked me to spend the night, but I could not because my elderly and judgmental mother was in town visiting. That’s when our dynamic changed and it seemed to me to go off the rails. Very awkward. We had two pre-scheduled dates afterward that were in teasingly awkward. Then he called me. He asked me what I wanted and I told him I want something exclusive and meaningful. I explained that I am used to knowing I am on the same page with a man first and that I declined because was afraid that I would be serious afterward, but he would be casual which would be hurtful. Then he told me that whereas he had been “captivated” (his word) before, now it is just “awkward” (his word) and he does not think he can go back and pick up where we left off. He asked if I can go back and pick up where we left off and I said yes, I can. He then said he would think about it while he’s out of town over the next few days and let me know if he changes his mind. I found that insulting, but just said ok and goodbye. I realize he could have taken it as a rejection, but I feel like with my past significant relationships this would have been a big nothing burger, and certainly not anything that could not be recovered from. After all, things went far enough between us for there to be no reasonable doubt that I desire him. So, what do you think? Is his behavior reasonable or am I right that the punishment does not fit the crime? Any feedback and advice would be greatly appreciated!
Most of the time, couples who argue too often but have otherwise healthy marriages can repair this problem relatively easily. In simple terms, if you and your spouse fight too much or argue often over small issues, you need to learn how to prevent the useless arguments and have more important disagreements in a more civilized and constructive manner.
For a long time you felt pain from your relationship. Most likely, it hurt quite a lot when she left. The problem lies in the fact that you didn’t have the knowledge to help you steer your relationship in the right direction and be happy in it. Many men know the art of meeting and courting women, so it is easy to fall in love with them. But with time, they lose something very important and their girlfriends get disappointed, eventually losing interest and leaving. Using years of experience, research and observations, I was able to work out a step-by-step system that can help you rekindle the passion and get the relationship with your girlfriend to the same happy place it was before. In this course, I lay out many situations and clearly explain how to act in each one of them. If you follow every advice I give you, your girlfriend won’t want to stay away from you.
i broke my ex coz i found out he was cheated on me..the other girl use my bikini..and i did not talk to him for a week and he ask sorry and want to be friends with me so i become friends with him he spent christmas and new years in my house..new years there is something happened me and him i thougth we are go back together but looks like he dont want to see me anymore..i invite him to go out with my friends party he did reject me so i tell him i will not bother him anymore we been together for 2yrs like live together..now he text me that he miss me a lot..and im still the best ever he had..but i dont know if he want to ggo back with me or not..im still love him but i think he dont love what will i do now …i miss him a lot too…but i have to move on with my life now i did not text him anymore or even hang out with our common friends…im still confused…
Try not to jump right into another relationship straight away in a bid to make your ex jealous. I’m not saying ‘’don’t focus on yourself’’ but this is not the way to go about things as it only gives a negative message to your ex which may backfire if they do the same thing. so, what can you do to focus on yourself? You can start from appearance (new haircut, new clothes, get down to the gym, eat healthier, etc) keeping a good attitude and staying open-minded. Upgrade yourself with your outer appearance and inner attitude. Be the best version that you can be of yourself. If you’re really wanting to move on, then maybe you want to check out The Best Chat Up Lines to use on girls.
He still keeps me in contact through texts. For a while he ignored me because I made the mistake of trying to talk to him about the relationship and advised me to give him time to be alone and that I should relax for a long while. Recently, he messaged me saying that my facebook made him sad (I was going on dates and posting feelings about not believing in love anymore) and then proceeded to tell me how he isn’t feeling okay and is just managing to get through each day. He told me that he hates himself because he made people feel sad and hurt them. Then I asked him if we could hang out sometime and he said some day not today. Afterwards he went back to giving me short responses.
So my boyfriend broke up with me two weeks before Christmas and I’ve tryed everything to get him back. It looks like its hopeless even though we are really good friends now and he seems into me again. I just don’t know if I should see if he really ever liked me or if he still does. We’ve been together before, although it took a year and a half to get back together. I’m wondering of the spark is still there!
btw I got stuck in this funny situation I don’t know if it’s possible but can you or your staff delete my comment stating my story ( on august 19, 2018) ? A friend of mine is suggesting this site for me and I’m too afraid that she may read my comment here she will instantly know it’s me .. Im so totally busted if that happens hahahaha pretty please help mee all of my NC plan will go to nothing if this happen cause she’s pretty close to my ex and I can’t really trust her mouth LOL..
In the succeeding weeks it struck me that that rabbit's hole was a good off-beat place to take a date. So I convinced the girl I was currently dating more or less unsuccessfully to accompany me there. She was impressed by the place, dusting off a chair before she sat on it. I sprang for two love potions. Mine seemed bluer than that of my date. The drink left me tingling, a feeling I recognized from having tried certain bizarre liquors in the past. The whole experience was fun and probably worthwhile. The lady had a small garden in the back of her shop. But my love life did not improve. Neither did that of my girl friend, unless it was with someone I did not know about. I tried the potion a couple of more times, but nothing good happened.
You may worry about the old adage, “Out of sight, out of mind,” and use that as a justification to reach out. The thought of him moving on and forgetting about you is too terrifying to bear. One little text won’t hurt, you reason. But, in this instance, it will hurt. If you want your ex back, it is important that you strictly adhere to the no contact rule.