I decided I had to take matters into my own hands and since I spend a lot of my workday online, that’s where I looked for answers. I discovered a wealth of information on the internet and in the course of my online travels I came upon some great products that were heads above the rest in terms of quality and professionalism. These products (for example the excellent Save My Marriage Today system by Amy Waterman, and the first marriage book I ever read, the invaluable Save the Marriage by Lee Baucom really changed my perception of the problems my wife and I had, and it was like turning on a light bulb.
hi natasha! i’m glad i found this blog! i just broke up with my ex last night, he decided to leave me bc i often threatened him if he messed up n hurt me. he said a lot of bad things about me last night and i threatened him back and we agreed to made a silly and stupid agreement, that he will do EVERYTHING that i ask from him till the end of this year then i promised i’m the one who will dumb him and he agreed with that (because i threatened him of course). and if he mess up he will add 1 more month for me to stay with him. i feel confused now, i want to get back with him bc to be honest i was the one who always overreacted but at the same time i don’t think he wants me anymore, he really hates me. what should i do?? i decided not to contact him for the next few weeks but seriously i have no idea what should i do next.. ps: we are in a long distance relationship and before we broke up, he still listened to me when i told him to get home early from his friend’s place. he hates me but at the same time he always do what i say to him even if i didn’t threaten him. also his friends told him to leave me. please help me i need some advices from you! thanks a lot natasha!! xoxo
The reason you must answer these questions to yourself is so that you can determine a couple of things. First, do you really want to get him back, will you be happy or are you just lonely right now, but deep inside you know that it probably won't work out if you get back together? You must believe that things will work out between the two of you and that you can be happy together again. Otherwise, if you don't have total belief in this relationship, then it's not worth trying to get him back.
Again, this is risky since there is a higher chance of him saying no. However, if you two were really making a lot of progress via texting and you really think he is feeling the same way you are about your current relationship then the “I was in the neighborhood method” may do the trick for you. The obvious advantage is that you get an instant date/meet up!
I met a guy whilst on holiday in Egypt. He seemed really lovely and we saw each other every day and eventually went to his flat ad stayed there at night with him so we were spending 24 hours a day together. Hr said he loves me and wants to marry me I didn’t take it too serious but then I found I had called for him. On my last day he gave me his number and Facebook. When I got back to England I looked at his Facebook it was all women tourists which he has commented on their wall my love habibi and sending hearts to them. The two profiles I could see were a year ago these comments were made but I would not have gone there at all of I had of seen this to start with. He also had one for Arab friends. I went to finish it because I am 43 and he is 26 and I can’t be doing with the drama of Facebook. He never added me but said he would delete his facebooks it took him a couple of weeks but he did it. I said messenger as well because of all these women he had contact with. He said he would and he did. We have spoken everyday and night then hr started no messaging me at night his cousin told me he takes women out shopping at night for money so when he wasn’t messaging me he was doing that and he was saying no women. I made a fake profile of a woman who was gorgeous and he added her on messenger before he deleted it.It came to a massive argument he said I was jealous etc and he said he wanted to finish it. I did a terrible thing and emailed his work and told them he was taking women outside the hotel (they aren’t supposed to) and he got fired. When I got a response from the hotel they said this isn’t the first or last time it will happen that’s why he got fired. We still were speaker he was still telling me he loved me and messaging me but he was sad about loosing his job and I feel so guilty I just got sick of the lies (if they are lies) I was to meet his family and then we were planning to get married. I forgave him for all that because I know I can be jealous. I don’t know if it because I wouldn’t act like this when I have a boyfriend. Anyway a week ago he sent me a message saying I will need forgive you for loosing my job no work etc. Although I had sent money equilvilent to his monthly salary that he lost and said I would do it every month till he gets a job because his family rely on HIM for money. We had a n arguement he blocked me off wats app downloaded messenger again. I downloaded viber a day later and said I loved him he said he loved me and missed me and hr wasnt going to delete messenger although he says he wants this to speak to his family he has gone to see his family so I wander is he speaking to the women he had on Facebook? He hadn’t initially told his mom about me sending and email to his work bit has now told her she says I am bad and he isn’t to marry me he said loves me still I said I will leave him till he has got rid off messenger. He said OK I love you and that was three days ago. I read this article and feel better but I do miss him but do wander is it worth all the bother with this silly apps x
Wow that was a lot huh? I mean, we haven’t even started contacting our exes yet have we? Well, right now is when we begin that step. Are you excited? Alright, there is a lot of debate about this step. Every expert (myself included) seems to have a different opinion on the method you should use for contacting an ex. Some recommend writing a get your boyfriend back letter, some say you should give them a call and some even say you should text. So, what is the best method?
In most cases, a woman will be feeling unsatisfied for months or even years before she breaks up with her man. Why so long? Humans try to hold on to the loving relationships in their life. It’s a natural instinct. In addition to that, break ups feel like crap. It’s a horrible experience, especially if you are unsure whether or not you will feel okay on your own.
When things are rocky, having sex or performing acts that pleasure your partner are not always in the cards. But even if you're not in the mood at the moment, there's hope if you actually still want to connect intimately, according to Rachel Russo. She says wanting to have sex even when you are struggling with a relationship, shows that you are deeply bonded to your partner. "If it feels unnatural to withhold sex even when things are rocky, it can indicate that you are thinking about what is best for the relationship in the long term," says Russo. "If you don't want to deprive your marriage of the intimate connection, it is a sign that you really care about each other and want to make the marriage work."
When a couple has been very close for a long time, the rupture of that relationship is painful. Letting go is not easy and is usually regarded as regrettable. “I invested ten years of my life in that person,” someone may say. It is as if there should be some return on all those years, some tangible remainder of all that effort. It is as if the end of the relationship invalidated everything that went before. It is usual, therefore, and natural, to want to hold on—to recover what has been lost. To fall back in love, if that is possible.
The course includes the most important information that I have made easy to comprehend. Not many people like to read 300-page books that only have 30-40 pages of useful information. I made sure that my material is easy to read and is not too long. My methods are presented in a step-by-step action plan that doesn’t include any unnecessary information. I offer you only the information that can be useful to you and that has proven to work.
This is a great article. Thank you. It made me feel a lot better. I broke up with my boyfriend 3 months ago and I started seeing someone else right away. Maybe that was a bad idea, because he really was just a “bandaid” and it ended up being an explosive disaster pretty quickly. After that I’ve been feeling incredibly depressed and desperately missing my ex. He was not just my ex but he was also my best friend. However, after reading the “checklist” here, it has helped remind me of the reasons why it didn’t work out between us. We actually broke up dozens of times over the 2 years of our relationship. It was for a reason. He told me we are not right for each other romantically, and I know he is probably right, as much as it hurts me to admit it. I could never picture myself marrying him or having a family with him. But I miss him so much and I want to be friends, but he says we can’t because we’ll just end up getting back together. I know that’s probably true too because we’re attracted to each other naturally. I just can’t understand why we can’t be in each other’s lives at all. I can’t deal with that.
Unfortunately, partners often go through mutual misunderstandings, because no one teaches us how to act in a relationship. What we see on TV and in movies, what we are told by many friends, about the behavior of men and women is most often very far from reality. So if you are blaming yourself, I am telling you to stop! It is possible that not everything in the demise of your relationship is your fault! If you would have known exactly what to do to keep your couple in a happy state, I’m sure you would have done everything that depended on you. Most likely you just didn’t have the right information. But everything can still be fixed...
“Hi! I’ve been a fan of your work for over five years now. When I broke up with my ex, I was devastated. Then I read a lot of your stuff about getting your ex back. It changed my thinking and my thinking changed my life. I worked on myself. I started doing makeup, became a makeup artist, launched my makeup line, and have started to get recognition. I feel so good about myself now and I have no regrets. Now my ex wants me back but I realized I don’t want to go back because I’m moving forward. Thanks for everything you’ve shared and written.”
You need to give her space for three reasons: 1) People simply need space; if you can't give her any space, maybe that's something you can work on to show her that you've changed. 2) She'll get an opportunity to realize how good you are; not that she doesn't know this already, but she may not feel it in her bones. 3) You'll show her how independent you are on your own; the "rebel" is so attractive to women because he's totally on his own and doesn't need other people.
However she has a boyfriend that they have been together for about a year and a half. He treats her like shit, talks to her like shit and to top it off he is a fat sweaty nerd! OK here is the kicker- She is a former Texans cheerleader. She is beautiful, and Im not a bad looking guy! I have recently kicked my “bad Habbit” but she is still with this geek and I for the life of me cant figure out why she wont leave this jerk. She is my best friend.
Get some new clothes. New times call for new duds. It's a subtle change in you, but the importance will be clear to her: your new outer shell will signal deeper changes underneath. Get that new shirt that you've been wanting to buy, or those new pair of jeans. Looking sharp is an important aspect of physical attraction, and if she sees you looking great in unfamiliar clothes, she'll sense that there's been forward movement, if not wholesale change.
It works better with guys you know in real life, but if you’re having trouble getting started then pick your favorite actor. The important part is that you do this once per day, and that you really stick with it. It might not seem like it’s doing much at first, but in reality it’s detoxing your mind consciously and unconsciously from your ex, and putting you in a much better mental state.
Need some help. Devastated. I was with my girlfriend for 18mths. Moved in together after 10mths. We went on a trip overseas and it was hell. two months later she ended it. She was upset she did it and said she misses me and we kept seeing each other for about a month. Then told me its not happening. She’s fallen outta love. Hurts like hell. She said she did try in that month but its gone for her and that she can’t talk for awhile and needs space. Then, stupidly, I was bored and missing her about 2wks later and sent her text saying that if i was better to her we’d be doing something together right now. She got back to me the day after and wasn’t happy at all. Asked for me to stop contacting her and that she will never love me again. Ouch! I really want her back. Not sure what to do from here. How do i get her back?
Unfortunately, if he really wants to leave, there's nothing you can do to stop it. Even if you still love him deeply and want to continue, if he doesn't, it doesn't continue. However, you do have a right to get clarity from him. Try to agree to something that suits you both. Instead of moving out, consider sleeping in separate beds for a while, or agree to only talk about these matters on Thursdays, giving the two of you guaranteed peace of mind all the other days.
Me and my girlfriend just broke up yesterday night and on top of that we argued big time that night… I know she really feels for me but we butt heads like crazy and maybe it’s because I don’t like when I know she’s right. We’ve been together for 3 years but it seems like we were rushed into being together because my friends were jealous and a lot of lies were spilled! Eventually me and her pulled each other together because of the chaos. We didn’t get a chance to be friends and like stuff about each other. We didn’t get a chance to be boyfriend and girlfriend. She’s been there for me so much but she think I don’t appreciate because the last 2 years we have argued a LOT! Please help. She wants the old me back, the one she first meet. I need tips on how we can get back together and I’m a better person for her.
Reason #2 – Creates Feeling of Loss: Another reason to use no contact is, it helps in developing the feelings of loss in your ex boyfriend’s mind. Your boyfriend will start thinking why she is not calling me. He will start getting second-guessing to his decision of breaking up with you. Once he starts getting these second-guessing thoughts it will be great helpful for you.
Your main goal in this section is to just open up communication. Remember though, you want to be in control at all times. That means that YOU have to be the one to end the conversation. To make matters more complicated you can’t get into a full blown conversation with him yet. This is simply a small baby step that you are using to test the waters and gauge where you are at.
The day we broke up, we went out fishing with two friends and it was really cool, and we went to see some of his friends play handball ( which is a very important part of his liife, but i have never played, so don’t really care, but I wanted to make the effort for him and to be with him). I was doing so good until he decided to go play ball with his friends during half time, leaving me alone on my chair, while I had come to be with him. There were two people I had talked to before close by ( which was his excuse to leave me) but they were talking the foreign language and imagine how hard it is to engage in the conversation when you don’t know what it,s about and you need to switch language… So i got mad at him and told him it wasn’t cool to leave me on my own.
My girl and I had been trying to figure out something to do for New Years. Her friends had asked what we were going to do, and I through out the idea of going to Atlantic City, in which they politely declined. Than I figured, what the hell, let us just go, and she started to say how she isn’t going to have the money for it since she will be heading to Michigan with family for the holidays and wouldn’t be working. While she I was away, all I could think about was ringing in the New Year with her for the first time. Things have been perfect. I have never been happier. She brightens up my world.
Got a text from my GF immediately returning from a vacation together. She said she didn’t feel as invested in our relationship as I did. We’d been dating 2 and a half months, extremely attracted to each other, the sex was incredible for the both of us, & we spent a good bit of time together. Within the first month, she was talking about settling down & getting a place together. Admittedly, I was a little taken back by it, but handled it appropriately. Obviously it showed she had been rather interested in me and then some. The breakup happened via text as I said before & about not being as invested in me as I was with her. Not even a week later, she’s already texting me & admittedly I respond, but it’s usually silly stuff. I want to be back with her in the worst way but can’t get a good read on what the hell happened or what’s happening? Any recommendations on how to proceed? Thanks.
I don’t think anyone should worry so much about getting him or her back. Sometimes relationships just don’t work and that’s okay. Sure, it hurts like hell, but that doesn’t matter as much. Don’t stay in relationships. And for godsake if he dumps you, then just get on with life. You shouldn’t be begging and pleading to get back together with someone who treated you poorly. Yes, you probably made mistakes but the point should be that so did he. You’re not the only one at fault here. Try to remember that, when you want to get back together with him, just think do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? Not only that but if one night can make up his mind, then do you really want him? There are better guys out there that actually care about more than sex. You can do so much better. Take time to heal yourself and worry about fixing yourself for you.
Well we broke up just 8 days ago.. actually he broke up with me anyway when i ask him to reason he said “I think it’s not gonna work. I always leave you alone and I know you have suffer about so I don’t wanna make you upset anymore” (for me it’s a stupid reason) normally he is an introverted person who doesn’t like to share his past and whatever happens he keeps smile that’s why I wanna be with him all the time. He got jealous when I changed my profile picture (I was with my friend) so he kept asking me that who is that person after we broke up. He also told me that “I can’t imagine my life without you in it” so he made me confused. I’m still inlove with him and I feel that he is still love me but Idk what should I do? T.T
We ran into each other randomly about five years later. I was stunned to see him (he was in my house of all places, someone brought him to a party there and he had no idea he’d be seeing me!). I could barely speak I was so nervous. We chatted for a bit, then he messaged me on Facebook a few days later and we talked for hours and hours, I was positive that this was the beginning of round two for us, but then he went dark again. A few more years went by and we ran into each other again. Once again I had soaring high hopes… and then was crushed again when nothing came of it (I found out later he had a girlfriend at the time).
If you’re already involved in a platonic friendship with your ex-girlfriend, you can turn the situation around. They key thing to do is to start to pull away. You want your ex to get the sense that she is losing her hold on you and you could be starting to move on without her. Right now she is counting on your friendship and hasn’t considered the possibility that you wouldn’t be a part of her life. There are specific actions you can take at this time to make a romance more appealing. Get her to see you as a potential partner again, and her feelings towards you will soon change.
Hi this is Desireen again … So im about to finish my No contact period but he hasn’t attempt to contact me. And I heard she’s escorting another girl.. how can I approach him?? I’m really not sure if I can approach him since I feel so shy after all the things that happened And what if the two of them end up together? Should I still reach out for him or should I wait again??.. Im really nervous that I may not get him back
so Ive been with my boyfriend for almost a year, just a week before the anniversary he ended it. ive been trying to stop crying but i simply cant. specially the fact that many thing remind me of the good memories i had with him. he was the first real bf i had, and i was his first relationship. so having mistakes and some arguments were normal i think, so i neglected them. the good thing about him was that even after the times it was my mistake and he was hurt, we spent the night crying and apologizing and saying i was sorry, and the day after that he was totally normal. the longest time that we didnt talk was like 24 hours coz he had no reception in the mountains. the real question for me is that the usual relationship tips never worked on him. playing hard to get, staying out of touch or trying to make him jealous would just make him say: ” stop that… i know what you’re doing!” even in the beginning of or dating and after we knew each other well, i knew he was somehow different. you know he was like 50 shades, not the crazy kinky side of him of course but the part where he took care of me and protected me. despite his age, hes been working for long and its been almost two years that he provides for his family. he pays for the mortgage, buy food and all that. and he also goes to college in another city. he does not party like boys his age do and all the other boyish stuff. from the start, we both kinda knew that we cant last forever. i live in a country that family matters the most and in that part we were the opposite. but we are too young ( 22 ) for getting married or something like that, and i know that you might say im too young for being hopeless of finding someone else. the fact is, arranged marriages kinda rule in my family ( i live in middle east if u need to know) and its not just underestimating myself but im short ( 5 feet only ) my hair wont grow longer than my shoulder, my noes is too big in my face, and believe me, i have consulted with different doctors about my problems, but they need solutions or surgeries that my dad wont let me do. even my mom says im not beautiful. my sister mocks my face and body. let alone people in college and so on. im in a family that love and support does not exist, and coz im not that fun and outgoing because of my economic situation, i cant really go out with my girlfriend much. so im asking you this, coz Ive been asking myself: whats the harm? now that im alone i can understand how much the breaking up hurts, and i know that if it went on longer, it would have been even worse. but considering all those things i told you, isnt he the best for me right now? and considering the fact that he always acts different, and also kinda mannish despite of his age, how can i get him back? its our anniversary in a few days, and his birthday in 3 weeks. would that be okay if i contact him in those days?