I really like the links from the first comment. I think as long as the two people love each other it doesn't matter what they did. unless its cheating. Trust is hard for me to understand. MY bf doesn't trust me and even though he has done things to break my trust in different ways I feel like I know him and can understand he's just a human and we make some mistakes sometimes. I try and change how he wants me to, to be a better person and show him I do care but somehow its not ever enough. I do not know how I can show him I care. He wants a big grand gesture but I do not have money or an idea of what to do. He said something like seeing him at work would make him feel like I care but when I didn't do u it his time limit that I didn't even know about he got mad. I just want to show him he is special but every little thing doesn't mean anything to him anymore. I can say I felt like how he describes because he hurt me and I didn't care about anything but distressing helped me see more clearly and what I needed to. I think that's what's going on with him because he hasn't been able to distress.
However, even Michael admits you shouldn’t just rush out and start texting your ex, “First of all, you should leave a 30 day gap before starting to use Text Your Ex Back (or any program for that matter.) Even if you’ve been broken up for a while, if you’re in contact with your ex, you should leave a full month where you don’t talk to him/her at all. From there it’s a matter of accumulating “little wins” with your ex.”The “little wins” Michael talks about are things like just getting your ex to respond and then having a conversation over text that YOU end first. From there’s it’s just a matter of following Michael’s proven formula and developing a new relationship with your ex over time.
Posting here for sanity. I was moving on and got to a good place and just like herpes he came back. Gave me the line that he has had a really bad week, he wants to talk to me. I ate up that breadcrumb up like my life depended on it. Back to checking up on him on FB, back to checking my email 36376799x a day. Now haven’t heard from him again, but he has time to like sexual garbage on FB and be on FB all.the.time. Pretty sure he is chatting up others, but why do I flipping care? how many more red flags do I need? Moving on….again.
Dear God, I have hit rock bottom. I have nowhere to turn and nobody to rely on. You are my rock. You are the only way. I am here no on my knees… holding back the flood of tears. Give me wisdom to save my relationship with my boyfriend Willie.I want him back in my life. I love him lord. I don’t want Willie to go to another woman/girl. I really really want him back. Please Lord Strengthten our Relationship and strengthen our love lord. I know only you can save this. I beg up you. I plead with you. Show us a better way together. Please open his heart to my love and your forgiveness. Please touch his soul at this very moment. Where ever he is and what he is doing… touch him Lord. Help him see we need to save this love. Please, I ask and pray with all the strength that you are giving me just to be able to breathe. i am lost without him. Lord I need him. I need to feel your love with him. Dear Lord I pray. Please give me the right words, guide me to help save our relationship. Show me how strong I can be through you. My tears soak my spirit, my heart is breaking. I cannot hold on. I feel like every ounce of life is draining from me. Renew me. Renew me. Make him see. Use us as an example of how forgiveness and your love can save and change people. Help him rebuke satan and his temptations. I love him so dear Lord. I will honor you with my love for him. Give me this chance. Please reach out to him now and help him see we need to save this. I love you Lord. I will never doubt your ability. Please do this. Save us. Please. I beg u Lord..
One great piece of advice that you’ll find in my Free Email Article Series is the importance of spending time together with no “marriage talk” and no pressure. Just to remember that you can enjoy each other’s company. (This might pleasantly surprise both of you when there is less anger in the air). This is Allison and I in Cape Cod Last Year celebrating 12 years!
Regardless of what's going on in your marriage, you still know in your heart that you can talk to your husband about how you truly feel. "We all crave acceptance for who we really are," says Beam. "Not pretending to be what the other person wants us to be is crucial. If both people continue to offer the other safety to be transparent without judgment or rejection, their relationship is highly susceptible to being saved," says Beam.
Well we got back together all was good until I went back into my old ways of being insecure and needy. We had a big fight that reminded him of why he broke up with me. We ended up making up and I left the next day to go home ( he lives in the city and I live in the country) he told me he loves me and to let him know when Im moving back in 2months time and he’s going to miss me until then. When I got home I overcontacted him I apologized, he said it was ok. 2weeks later I pressured him and push cause I wanted to move down alread, he got angree and brought up the argument we last had and told be he has no interest in seeing me. After 2weeks we talked and he was ok and was back to asking me to let him know when I’m moving back. But I played into my insecurity and overcontacted again calls, texts, emails. He has now ask that I don’t call him as he has nothing to say to me and he’s going interstate to stay with his friend for a while. So yeah Ive messed up. Going to give him space for a while and see what happens. I don’t believe it’s a lost cause, I really have to change.
He said he started contacted her when he and I started to talked about marriage which is last year. He said he is not ready to get married, so that is his excuse to suddenly betray me? He is 27 yrs old and I am 30 yrs old. All this while I never force him to get married with me. we have been together for 5 years for god sake I never force him to propose me. So he said he don’t know how to decide because he love both!!. Hello!! i have been with him for 5 years through bad and happy times, and he only with her I think 1 year or less than 1 year before me. He said he felt guilty he just leave the girl because of her status. then what about me? so I have been waiting for 2 months for him to decide. He once said to me he is not ready to get married but in his heart I am the one he want to be married to. Bullsh*t. I tried no contact but then i reach him out after two weeks. I’ve been pleading, crying, begging you name it. now i think about it i feel ashamed. This is coming from a guy that once said that he is a loyal person. F*cktard!. I even asked him what is actually our current status but he said he didn’t want to talk about that yet. so I respect him i give him space. But then during my last begging session with him when he deleted his social media that full with our happy moments, we got into a fight and misunderstanding and he accidentally said that he feel suffocated with me. Because he misunderstand what i meant during that begging session. I suddenly feel fed up and mad and all my sadness that time turn into this anger. I then said we are officially over ( i never said this before, i really determined when i said this). he then realized that he misunderstand and accidentally said he feel suffocated with me. so he try to apologize but just like that no effort just word. saying he apologize and cannot do anything if i want to end the relationshi*. maybe he thought i will be running back to him in a couple weeks. NO NO NO NOT THIS TIME. its been 5 days since i put a stop on this. This time is real! I will never reach to him first. I will never wish him on his birthday. My absence and silent is my gift to him. i feel like during those last 2 months he put me on the hook. he don’t want to let me go but he didn’t decide also which one he want.
My boyfriend left me 2 weeks ago ;( evrything was absolutely amazing and perfect. I love him and his little girl so much and i feel heartbroken. We had 8 mounths relationship in witch we lived together….I think i was a bit jelous of his ex, the mother of his daughter, witch i regret now ;( but is it too late? I think he loves me, despite when he left me he said he doesn’t want a relationship and he doesn’t love me the same way i do. Is it possible to tell me all this just to make me go away, or to protect me, or I really dunno….and that’s killing me…. I haven’t slept proparly, i haven’t eaten proparly, i hate my job ( and I think that was one of the reasons we start having problems, cause i was really moody ) and i just want him back. PLEASE, i need help, i am so confused and hurted. .. If anybody have any advice i am happy to listen
Change up your look. Making small changes to your hair or wardrobe can have a huge impact on your overall confidence and make you feel good about yourself. In fact, tweaking your external appearance can, amazingly, inspire the courage you need to make more substantial changes. Something as simple as honing your personal style can eventually lead to actions and choices that can improve your energy, satisfaction, and joy in life. Investing time and energy in making small improvements to your outer appearance makes you feel joyful, confident, and entirely yourself and will only lead to good things.
Recall those early days of your relationship when your partner could not get enough of you. He or she would call constantly, stay on the phone for hours, talk with you all night. Now time has passed, and you no longer get butterflies in your tummy when you think of your sweetheart. The spark is gone. You still have romantic feelings for him or her, but you sense that your partner no longer cares as much about the relationship — or at least not as much as you do. You no longer have the upper hand.
My ex girlfriend dumped me last night. She said that I treated her better than anyone ever had before, and when I asked why she was breaking up with me she said it was because I treated her more like a friend then a girlfriend. I was okay with it and trying to start to move on but then she texted me and said “I hope that this break up wont be a permanent thing and that I hope someday soon we can get back together”I have no clue what to do but I would like to get back togethersince she was the only girl I actually readily liked. Please help.
Im so confused my bf of 1 yr broke up with me in October i was ready to move on when he started texting me and wanted to see me i keep saying no until i gave in and accepted.. we started hanging out and spending time together and all the rest.. Out of nowhere he decided that it’s time to move on and want us to stop seeing eachother, he keeps telling me that he loves me and it shows we have so much fun together, but he is so against to give out relationship another chance not now and not later he says… i dont know what to do we love each other and i know we can make this work.. he even told me that he is ready to see someone else already but there’s noone else in his life at this point. We just sent NYE together should i believe that he really moved on so quick or is he just trying to push me away.. Since we broke up I haven’t really give him time to miss me i have been there for him all the time, after the break up he started going out all the time and he had a car accident i was the one he called to be with him… Now im so confused any adviced??
When people explain to me why they stay in unsatisfactory relationships long past the point where family and friends and everyone else encourage them to leave, they often say, “I love him/her.” I know that that is the real reason. Love has evolved as a powerful device to keep people together despite any defect or deficiency of a partner. Nature requires them to stay together long enough to have children. But it is not a good reason. As more or less rational animals, we can make decisions that promote our own individual interests. People who are capable of falling in love once can fall in love again and again if that first relationship breaks apart. The issue each person has to decide in the midst of a bad marriage or a bad affair is whether it is possible to be happy in that relationship—and, really, whether it is possible to be happier with someone else. Unfortunately, the alternative that occurs to many is not another partner, it is loneliness.
God please help me, i am asking you to please help me save my relationship.my best friend and i had a fallout and are not on good terms. I truly want this relationship to work out. I love spending time with him and we have so much fun together. Things were going so well n then we had a fight today. God please help me help him see that im a good girl and that wr can be happy together. God please i need him in my life. Please help him to see me for the good and forgive me for our past issues. I am so heart broken right now. Gos please save us. Please give me the opportunity to talk this out with him and make everything okay. Please god. Dont let him give up on me
“Hi! I’ve been a fan of your work for over five years now. When I broke up with my ex, I was devastated. Then I read a lot of your stuff about getting your ex back. It changed my thinking and my thinking changed my life. I worked on myself. I started doing makeup, became a makeup artist, launched my makeup line, and have started to get recognition. I feel so good about myself now and I have no regrets. Now my ex wants me back but I realized I don’t want to go back because I’m moving forward. Thanks for everything you’ve shared and written.”
Hi am Jeff,and going through a lot after ma girlfriend became my ex.I have to say it’s all my fault because I was cheating on her and i was telling her lies I have to call myself a fool for that.Now am hopeless am going through so much pain because I truly love her and am truly in need of her,but the worst part is that she can’t pick up my calls instead she rejects my calls, she doesn’t reply to my text messages,she blocked me on facebook I can’t send a message using facebook,but she can’t black list my mobile number (blocking it).I need her and I don’t want to let go .HELP PLEASE!!
So I dated this girl for 8 month got engaged n she prego and she broke up with me cuz I want to talk I showed to the bar cuz she meet her mom there n I talk to her mom saying let me talk to her first but I cud wait so I drove n her mom told me to leave so I did. But then Sunday she told me to move I did she doesn’t want nothing to do with me. I need help with this one
My boyfriend broke up with me about a week ago. He said he craves for independence and he he still loves me but that’s just what’s right to do. He pushed me away whenever I try to get close or hug or lean my head against his back. I really love him and I want to get him back but we are flatmates, we live together and I don’t know how to do the no contact? And I’ve gone home for a few days and I didn’t tell him where I was going. I’ll be going back in a few days and I’ll be seeing him again. What should I tell him if he asks me where I went? I don’t want to look like a loser grieving so much for our relationship. And I really want to get him back.
I broke up with my gf for an extremely obvious reason – she didn’t love ME. Girls, please. I need true love, not a fakened up “story”. It was my first relationship, and I didn’t get a new girlfriend since then. We didn’t have any sexual contact either. But it was going on for 1.5 years. I loved her, but eventually she killed all my feelings towards her. I was trying to look sexy, to smell amazing, was extremely kind. Was probably the best she could deserve. Yet she didn’t understand it…now I just want to ask dear, dear girls – there are people like me who you never notice that are looking for a serious relationship. Please notice them and pay attention to how you behave with them…especially do you love your bf’s or not. Right now I see what a jerky girl she is, for lying to me and faking up so much stuff just to claim “oh look I have the best bf ever” but never loved me in real. Seriously care for what you do girls, please. I don’t want any more experiences like this bullcrap full of lies. Thanx in advance.
I dont know what to write to him! NC is almost over and he has no social media so he has no idea what I’ve been doing. He also hasn’t contacted me which is okay. I’ve jotted down tons of ideas for my first email to him but I’m very scared. Hes always suspicious of people so I dont want to sound too needy or like I’m trying to use him. He might think if I’m messaging him a month later that I want to use him…hes stubborn as hell as well.
Make sure you want your ex boyfriend back for the right reasons. Are you really still in love with him? If so, it might be worth trying to get him back, by showing him you still care and that you believe things will be better this time. Sometimes breaking up provides time for both people to realize that, more than anything, they just want to be together again. However, if you have any other reason for wanting your ex back, reexamine whether it's a good idea to try to rekindle the relationship.
First thank you so much for this website!!! I found it the other day and it has already helped so much with helping me feel empowered again and work on my own self-care. I love the way you describe everything, even though I am still having a hard time, your posts bring me back to reality and help me to focus on myself and know I deserve better. So the short story is I was friends with my ex for over a year at the same undergrad and we went on a service trip together. We started dating during the summer and it was long distance for about 6 months. All of my friends and I agreed that he was such a respectful, kind, and all around great guy. I thought things were going well, he would tell me how much he cared about me and how he was lucky and glad he met me. I was supposed to go to his friends NYE wedding with him. Two days before the wedding he called and said the military is more important to him, he can’t do long distance, and he hasn’t liked me for the past month and a half even when he came to my family’s house. I was heartbroken and it felt unreal because of all the plans he’d been making and things he’d been saying to me. I didn’t think he was the kind of guy who could lie to me. My friends are saying he could just be confused and nervous about having to start different schooling with the military. It feels like he didn’t even try to fix things and give it a chance. I hate how much he hurt me but I do still love and care about him. It hurts because it has only been 2 weeks and on Monday he sent me a song title (because he used to send me a song of the week) but nothing else. Then the other night he sent me a message on Snapchat but I’m trying really hard not to open it since he would see that I did. I am doing no contact and reading your article has helped convince me that I need to do it for myself and focus on myself not to get him back. I deserve a guy that truly loves me and will chase after me even if times get tough. Thank you for helping me realize this!
Literally, my heart is breaking. I can’t get past this guy and today is the first day he hasn’t reached out since we broke up. Childhood sweetheart and 18 years of off and on. He still can’t commit and i still can’t walk away. My friends have had it listening to me cry, so here I am commenting…. while he chats up every female with a pulse. And I still want him back ?
Unfortunately, partners often go through mutual misunderstandings, because no one teaches us how to act in a relationship. What we see on TV and in movies, what we are told by many friends, about the behavior of men and women is most often very far from reality. So if you are blaming yourself, I am telling you to stop! It is possible that not everything in the demise of your relationship is your fault! If you would have known exactly what to do to keep your couple in a happy state, I’m sure you would have done everything that depended on you. Most likely you just didn’t have the right information. But everything can still be fixed...
I have been in relationship with my boyfriend for 2 year now and we were planning to get married soon and all of a sudden he left me for another girl, i really love this guy and never can imagine my life without him. I further tried all my best to get him back but all my effort to get him back in my life did not work out. It was on this faithful day, i came across some comments on a website about this great spell caster called Chief Dr Lucky, so many persons claimed that he help them to renew their relationship and bring their ex back, i had to contact him because he was my last hope. I contacted him through his email and he assured me that in two days time my boyfriend is going to leave the other girl and come back to me and it was a very great surprise to see my boyfriend coming back to me after two days. I am so very happy today that he came back to me and i achieved this with the help of Chief Dr Lucky, and i advice if you need his help too Email: Chiefdrlucky gmail com or Whats App: +2348132777335
Give yourself some time to reflect. Not only should you give her some space, but you should give yourself some space to reflect and think about what went wrong in the relationship. Take the time to sit down and ask what you did to make her not want you; were you too attentive, too moody, or too distant? Whatever you did, you have to make sure never to do it again if you want a moment of her day.
When I started dating my boyfriend we both fell hard and fast, I quickly learned that he was very insecure and could not be alone. He was drinking a lot and one day he would be the best person I could ever ask for and the next he would say horrible things to tear away at my self esteem. I started looking for job opportunities to move close to him, when that finally worked out I learned that he had been seeing someone else behind my back. I have tried to move on and date others but each time they want to get close I just couldn’t, I would feel as though I am cheating and then realize that I really don’t want someone else in my life, if he finds out that someone has an interest in me he makes accusations of me moving on and not caring about him. He will text me during the day when I know that the other guy is at work but as soon as it is the end of the work day he will no longer reply. It’s like he wants to live his life with someone else but also make certain that I am still there and committed to him. He will make accusations that he knows I’m seeing someone else or that I’m sleeping around when I’m not, I don’t know if that’s him just trying to feel good about the choices he has made to do just that. I can’t let go of the many words of encouragement that he has given me even with all of the hurtful ones he has made. It’s so hard to just quit loving someone that I have loved more than anyone. I’m reaching out trying to make friends in my new home but I can’t stop thinking about him all day every day. I wish I knew how to get him to feel what he felt when we first met, to see how I have always been there and committed to him. Whenever he needs help I am always there and I feel if I say no then he would have no need to stay connected with me and I just don’t want to lose him.
im doing the same thing you’ll do now your not alone i know it hurts but that what u should do, let him lose you and thinks hes a failure dont allow him to think he can play with your feelings, your not his toy if he cant decide what he wants then leave him to grom up and make decisions in life, hes immature and you did the right thing your so smart of going no contact and standing on what you want bravo, now do not let him take advantage and decide what he wants do what you want, you want him as a bf he didnt respect that he wants friends you dont so bye to him and lifes always comes around believe me one day he’ll come begging to have you back.
There’s this guy I used to date and I honestly don’t remember who broke up with who but my friend asked him why he doesn’t like me and he said I hurt him real bad but I don’t remember ever hurting him all I remember is him dating my other friend and I really want him back but it would be so awkward to walk up to him. We never talk but I really want him back!
Just imagine a scenario where you don’t want to talk to a person and they are sending you a text message every 5 minutes. Your inbox is filled with hundreds of messages by them, even though you haven’t replied to even one. And later on at night, that person gets drunk and calls you and start saying complete and utter non-sense. What would you think of that person? Would it make you want to start a new relationship with them?
How can you prevent this? Really, change. Make him change too. When you become better, you have the right to expect him to get better too. Build a relationship where you grow and improve together as individuals and partners, not enemy's that slow each other's progress down. He is not yours and never will be, not even when you both have a ring on your finger, so don't view him as a thing you've got a right over, like owning a car or your shoes.
It is natural to feel anxious and sad when this happens. Your anguish may lead you to attempt to use various manipulation tactics to get the upper hand in your relationship. But playing games to gain or regain the power in a relationship is bound to lead to its demise. There are many relationships in which one person holds more power than the other, but these tend to be extremely unhealthy. Physically or verbally abusive relationships, relationships in which one partner is cheating, and relationships in which one partner has more assets than the other (that are not common property) are often doomed to fail or to lead to heartbreak and unhappiness.
I recently lost, my girl it was my fault I got hooked up in internet adiction, porn sites and dating sites, she read my corespondance to the other women and even contacted them to see if we had met up. I did it for a quick sense of wantedness and no other reason, I’ve spoken to a doc about the adiction and confronted mtg demons, but she no longer trusts me and now I’ve lost her…
Okay so my boyfriend broke up with me because I was transferring to another college while he was being forced to go back to Chicago. When we talked, he told me he was staying a bit longer but he still chooses to go to Chicago, despite that he didn’t really want to break up with me. How do I know if he really wants me back? I still love him, but I don’t want to chase him away.
On the 22 he initiated contact that he was coming by the house, I didn’t answer and 29 of November he initiated contact again Stating he was coming by the house I didn’t answer. The reason I didn’t respond was because he at the time he had my house keys so he had access, whenever he wants. He sent another text on the 29th Asking if I had paid a bill only then I respond. During this same week, I knew he was angry since his coworker told me that they didn’t kiss, since her called got transferred to my phone and I ask her and she told him that I ask her. He then called me 7 times back to back but I didn’t answer. I went 2 weeks no contact although he was the one to contact.
I got a problem. can someone help?my boyfriend and i were together for 6 years. he has always had a drinking problem all his life.( including his family) we lived together for 3 years. last year he couldnt afford to help pay his share of the rent n bills.(he also has never had a steady job!) he had no choice but to move to another town 20 min away with 2 other guys. this was last july. since then, i seem to be makeing up excuses at times not to drive up to see him only because,for one i pay 4 his prepaid phone n he never seems to anwser so i never know if he is home or not,(lives on the 3rd floor) when he does pick up he is either drunk with his buddies or stoned,(he is very ignorant n loud when he is drunk or stoned) he says he wouldnt have to drink or smoke if i was up there.!! Im trying to teach him a lesson= call me to come over n make sure u are not high or drunk!! so am i wrong to do that? he also says i run my mouth n talk s^%$ alot. i only run my mouth to make him realize what he is doing to hurt me n the mess hes causing in our so-called relationship. past few wks he has only called every other 4 or 5 days to say he is at his moms working. Should i make more of an effort to go up 2 see him out of the blue? Or should he step up and show me he still wants me by quitting his drinking n partying? oh ya, this guy is 31 years old. a grown man.
Such great advice! For the first time since my bf has been ignoring me hardcore, I smiled at the thought that he’s really just a ninny ? The jerk left without a word and won’t pick up the phone when I call… No explanation just disappeared (I assume he’s my ex now?). I think I can handle ignoring him now. It’ll be hard, but this is encouraging. Thanks!
At this point, any negative feelings or opinions your ex had have most likely dissipated. He’s forgotten about the bad times, about the fights, about what went wrong. Human beings have a tendency to idealize the past. So once you’re “past,” he will only remember the good stuff and the bad stuff will drift further into the recesses of his mind. And it won’t be long before he starts to wonder what you’re up to…
A huge obstacle to getting your ex back is fixating on the relationship, pining for what was lost, and wishing things would be different. Not only is it an obstacle to getting the relationship you want, but it is also an obstacle to your own sense of peace. Think about it. Most suffering arises from wanting the present moment or present situation to be different than what it is.
St. Jude I ask that you find it in your heart to pray for me and my boyfriends relationship. I ask that you take away any temptation my boyfriend may have or remove any other individual that will come between our relationship. Help him to be aware of how much I care and love him. I ask that you help our relationship be strong, loving, honest, and respectful. In the name of the father the son and the holy spirit. AMEN