We also know that there are exceptions. There are relationships that probably should not stay together, such as those with physical violence, cruel and ongoing verbal abuse, extreme anger management issues, or long-term unaddressed substance abuse, for example. If you're in a situation like that, please eek the help of your local crisis management center.
Your relationship with a special guy has come and gone, but now you want him back. It's not unheard of for a couple to get back together after they've taken time away from each other, so don't give up hope. Just be sure to put plenty of thought into the reasons you broke up before attempting to get back together, as this can help you make the relationship work the second time around.
If you cheated on your partner, you need to be genuinely apologetic, and accept that your partner may not trust you or love you the way he or she once did. The only thing you can do in this situation (assuming you have ended the connection with the other person and sincerely expressed your regrets to your partner) is to show how much you love your partner every single day. Assuming you don't commit other infidelities, and that you are still with your partner, he or she may eventually return to loving and trusting you.
My ex and I were dating for 4 months. It wasn’t like any other relationship I have ever had! We were always having fun. He was a police officer that worked really long hours and on the night shift, I am an office manager who keeps daytime hours. As time progressed it grew harder to see one another but we still made time for one another. We never argued or fought really. Seriously everything went so smoothly, he was caring, and kind, and super sweet, and always went out of his way to show me that. Well when we first met, he told me he was in the process of buying a house, it was going to be about an hour away, well this made me uneasy but he was always reassuring me that we could make things work. Well one sunday afternoon before he was going to work i sent him a text to see what we were doing the next day, well his response was i don’t know i have yo close on my house tomorrow. Ummmmm wait a minute what house? His response was you knew I was buying a house. So i was loke leaving him alone at that point a few hours later, mind you he was at work, i text him i don’t think this is going to work you are nocturnal i am not we both work hard and its already difficult to see eachother and you live 15 mins away. anyways he told me he needed time to dedicate the conversation to. I said olay and goodnight and went to bed. I spent the next day pampering myself preparing for the worse, he texts me and acts like nothing had happened, i tell him we need to have a conversation, he said he needed time to sort things out, welll i pressured him and he agreed staying together would just be delaying the inevitable i cried he puked, i realized i had been overreacting and apologized and well he hasnt accepted my apology. I went on vacation a few days later and he watched my animals while i was gone, when i was away we kept minimal contact, relatively amicable, but when i got home i found a very expensive goft i had bought him months prior for his new house in the bottom of my laundry basket at this point i flipped out called him every name in the book and told him to get his coward ass to my house to drop off my keys. A day and a half later he showed up gave me my keys we say 3 or 4 words. I shut the door and lock itm i immediately apologize for my behavior but i told him i didn’t want him to see me upset. Now we don’t even speak. I am so hurt and distraught. I know we were together a short time, but i have been in 2 very long term relationships and i can tell you i have never felt the way i felt about him about any other person in my life. I don’t know what to do. I am so sorry, I apologized a milliom ways and he just doesn’t seem to care anymore. And he hasn’t tried once to contact me on his own in over 2.5 weeks.
Español: recuperar a una chica, Português: Fazer uma Garota Voltar para Você, Italiano: Riconquistare una Ragazza, Deutsch: Ein Mädchen zurück gewinnen, Русский: вернуть девушку, Français: reconquérir une fille, 中文: 赢回一个女生, Nederlands: Je vriendin weer terugkrijgen, Čeština: Jak získat svoji dívku zpět, Bahasa Indonesia: Merebut Kembali Hati Seorang Gadis, हिन्दी: दोबारा किसी लड़की का दिल जीतें, ไทย: ชนะใจแฟนสาวอีกครั้ง, العربية: استرجاع فتاتك مجددا, Tiếng Việt: Chinh phục bạn gái cũ, 한국어: 여자친구 다시 돌아오게 하는 방법, 日本語: 元彼女とよりを戻す
Following this advice helped me save my relationship. At the start I the break up I was messaging him a lot and begging to get back together. I looked stupid. After reading this I tried the no contact rule and focused on bettering myself and finding distractions when I felt the urge to talk to him. Just pretending to move on helped me feel a lot better about myself. We were later forced to work together and I kept my head up ignored him the best I could besides work relations and showed him that I can move on. Shortly after that he broke down to me about missing me and doing anything to have me back.
Recently found your blog after going through some weird “fwb to dating to him getting himself a gf” kinda situation for over a year now. Even tho I loved him I now realize I love myself more and I won’t put myself in this situation again. Thank you for putting things in a different perspective for me. It’s helped me out greatly and I’ve been more focused on myself now. Thank you!
I lost the love of my life over something stupid that I did. Long story short, I lied about my age. Although she didn’t care about my real age, it was the lie I carried on for a year that was part of the reason we broke up. She came from an emotionally abusive marriage and had baggage from that. And two kids who I came to love dearly – and who got along very well with mine. I know that she had issues stemming from childhood, specifically trust. But she’s an awesome girl – the love of my life, my parallel. But I messed up – I lied. Honestly, the lie started because I was afraid that she would be turned off when we first met (she’s 28 and I’m 48)…so I told her I was 44. Every time she brought up age stuff, I steered the conversation away. I wanted to tell her so many times but I knew that if I did that would end things. So I let it go and my heart is breaking because of it. It was her abusive ex-husband who cued her in and she defended me to him until I admitted it. Now, she won’t have anything to do with me. The breakup ended VERY BADLY. Probably the worst I’ve ever experience. Yelling/screaming/crying/etc. She said she can’t believe a word I said and felt like I used her for sex. She said that if I ever contacted her again that I’d be sorry. So I haven’t. At first after the breakup I did what everyone does – texted/called/emailed. I didn’t know of these steps. At any rate, she won’t talk and the last time we did I was met with extreme hostility. I know this one is done. Had I followed this advice there might have been a chance. But I doubt even that. Lessons learned the hardest of all ways. I wanted to marry her. It would have been my second and her third. I love her with all my heart and soul – she his my parallel. The yin to my yang.
Shelly I was reading some comments and yours had a bit on me !! It’s been a while since I’ve been searching for “how to make my ex come back to me “, and I think a lot of these articles helped a little after our first breakup. However, if you want to make this person become madly be in love with you, then I can recommend you to someone who helped me. I had a result in 2 weeks.

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The woman who was in a similarly awful marriage was the sole support of her husband, who did not work. She also took care of his child by another marriage on weekends, when he was typically not home. He too was regularly unfaithful, occasionally violent, and vulgar, and insulting all the time. He rarely wished for sex, but demanded it when he felt in the mood. He routinely expressed contempt for his wife. She finally left him and entered into psychotherapy. A week later she told me she was thinking of going back to him. “I love him,” she said, by way of explanation. She only stopped considering returning to the marriage a few months later when she met someone else.
Yes, I felt free in a way but totally sad ’cause I did wanna hang or talk or something, but he’s been a jerk for ignoring so long. I need to respect myself, but I want him back too. I haven’t blocked him from WhatsApp or Facebook, don’t plan to really, and I haven’t talked to him, but I really miss him. Should I just stand my ground and not reach out to him? I feel like this is the right thing to do and perhaps try to move on, but I love him. Thank you so much for your help and time, it means the world to me, well, to all of us.
One of the most devastating mistakes you can make is trying to force it to work with a guy who is wrong with you. I’ve seen people spend years of their life trying to shove a square peg into a round hole. Everyone in their life tells them to just move on and let him go but they can’t. Why? Because they don’t have clarity or any objectivity because they are still sucked into the emotional whirlpool and have yet to break themselves free.
Relationships often go through difficulties and misunderstandings. You most likely had serious arguments, after which you forgave each other. Sometimes, arguments lead to the demise of a relationship, though. And if you don’t start to act, having a good idea of what you need to do, your relationship will be doomed forever. It depends on you whether you will get your girlfriend back, or if she would be gone forever.
I need some suggestions I want my ex-girlfriend back I’m sure of it she broke up with me 4 months ago and has been with somebody else that same amount of time…..thruout that time all I have been saying to her is she made a mistake leaving me I want her back I miss her love her I have been blowing her phone up and she changed her number because of it I need to know even tho I did all of these things is there still a way I could get her to love me again and take me back and I have to work with her bf she’s with now
We ran into each other randomly about five years later. I was stunned to see him (he was in my house of all places, someone brought him to a party there and he had no idea he’d be seeing me!). I could barely speak I was so nervous. We chatted for a bit, then he messaged me on Facebook a few days later and we talked for hours and hours, I was positive that this was the beginning of round two for us, but then he went dark again. A few more years went by and we ran into each other again. Once again I had soaring high hopes… and then was crushed again when nothing came of it (I found out later he had a girlfriend at the time).
Alright, assuming you successfully engaged your ex boyfriend and got a decent response you can move on to this section. I’ll admit that you will have a distinct advantage here if you had a long relationship and made a lot of great memories. If your relationship was brief then this part of engaging your ex may be a little bit more challenging. However, that doesn’t mean anything bad it just means you might have to get more creative.
Do something nice for her without expecting her to pay you back. If she's studying late for an exam, pop by with her favorite tea or coffee and let her know that you know she's going to kill it tomorrow. If one of her friends gets in an accident, stop by and pay your respects (the friend will definitely let your ex know you stopped by). If your ex mentions she wanted to see a movie, buy her two tickets for her and her friend to see, and don't butt in. Your time will come soon.
Dated my ex bf for 1 year and 6 months, long story short we broke up cause we couldnt communicated with each other. I ended up in the ER with an asthma attack and he found out. He called me all worried and I told him I was fine. (It had been about 2 weeks since we had broken up that this had happened). Same week he calls me again to see how I’m feeling and that night I find out he’s talking to another girl. I call him up and tell him to fuck off and then he and that girl got into a fight cause a mutual friend of ours was telling this girl what my ex said to me when we broke up….telling me he was gonna realize hes wrong and come back. He calls me on black friday after thanksgiving and wants to see and talk to me. I see him that saturday and we catch up and yup…have sex. bad i know…anyways he then says he wants to try and work on things and give me a second chance. im thrilled. So less than a week goes by and on wednesday i go and see him and it was raining pretty bad so i had to stay over and we had sex again…it was not a good idea but i love this man so much…he calls me friday to tell me that he needs more time and doesnt know if he wants to work on us. He says he sees changes in me and thats what i had to do for myself….but also for him. I want him to come back to me so much. I love him.

I really enjoyed this article. It made me feel better about my situation perhaps hopeful. My boyfriend I started dating over 4 1/2 years ago and he broke up with me six months ago. Since then we’ve seen each other quite a few times. But it’s been difficult . Shortly after breakinh up it came up in conversation that he was no longer in love with me. Of course I was shocked because I couldn’t understand how someone could fall out of love so quickly. Since then we’ve met on several occasions. we don’t argue anymore and things are generally amicable between us.
My boyfriend and I broke up 4 days ago. We started having problems a few months ago and we just couldn’t fix them. It seemed like he just gave up on the relationship. We both still have feelings for each other, but we were both unhappy and stressed out. He started not texting me back, so I went psycho on him with my drunk texts and calls. That pushed him away and we broke up. He said right now isn’t the best time for our relationship and he does not want to put me first. Anyway, I really hope these steps work!
My ex-boyfriend and I have been together for a year and two months. Recently he told me that he is conflicted over him wanting to be with men and wanting to be with me. We spent all our time together and he always took care of me and wrote me sweet cards during our relationship. He told me he was struggling with reaching out to other men and felt like doing so during our relationship would be hurting me. He told me that he cares for and loves me but that he needed time to find out what he wanted and that he would come back to me if he isn’t gay and things aren’t good like what we have. He also said there is nothing I did but that he feels different. He’s been in several relationships with women but I’m his first for everything. I’m 22 and he is 21 and I have had more relationships than him. He feels like he hasn’t explored everything and doesn’t know himself well enough.
My boyfriend and I broke up 4 days ago. We started having problems a few months ago and we just couldn’t fix them. It seemed like he just gave up on the relationship. We both still have feelings for each other, but we were both unhappy and stressed out. He started not texting me back, so I went psycho on him with my drunk texts and calls. That pushed him away and we broke up. He said right now isn’t the best time for our relationship and he does not want to put me first. Anyway, I really hope these steps work!
These 3 steps are based on simple psychological techniques that work extremely well after a breakup. It’s not some mind tricks and cheap gimmicks that you will use to trick your ex into getting back together. If you are planning to trick your ex or force them into being with you, you are just going to end up in another miserable breakup. This guide will teach you how to start a new relationship with your ex; a relationship that actually has a chance of being a long lasting healthy relationship. Not the same old one which ended in this breakup.
My ex had a huge crush on me for about 3 years before we got together. When we finally did, it was AMAZING! We have super chemistry together, we click a lot character wise and we both loved eachother a lot. No relationship is perfect, but I promise, this one was… Until he found out he had a back condition and started taking these stupid pills which had loads of side effects and effected his moods, his libido, the way the thinks, everything!! He changed so much!!! After taking them for a month he has decided that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship any longer and wants to be alone.. This was 6 weeks ago! I was a bit clingy for the first few weeks and texted everyday but now I backed off… Still, nothing’s happening though! He keeps saying he knows what he lost, we were great but he needs this and he wants to stay alone…
If you want your relationship to get back on track, then you need to be humble and accepting what happened. You can’t get your ex boyfriend back by pointing fingers at him. You have to be humble throughout the whole discussion as this is the best approach to tackle this situation, and it will make your ex comfortable with you which will mend broken hearts.

Well we broke up just 8 days ago.. actually he broke up with me anyway when i ask him to reason he said “I think it’s not gonna work. I always leave you alone and I know you have suffer about so I don’t wanna make you upset anymore” (for me it’s a stupid reason) normally he is an introverted person who doesn’t like to share his past and whatever happens he keeps smile that’s why I wanna be with him all the time. He got jealous when I changed my profile picture (I was with my friend) so he kept asking me that who is that person after we broke up. He also told me that “I can’t imagine my life without you in it” so he made me confused. I’m still inlove with him and I feel that he is still love me but Idk what should I do? T.T
Some of these problems include conflicts about who does what about the house or who decides what to do on a particular weekend.  Other problems dissolve when it is understood– however long it takes to make the other person understand– just how strongly that person feels about certain matters. Examples of these solvable problems are: how much time one person spends at work or away from the other, which chores are really very difficult for the other person, how much sex they should have, how to handle disobedient children, how to spend money as investments or on vacation, how messy or clean the house should be, who does the cleaning, how to deal with fears of one sort or another. One spouse is not made weaker by considering what the other needs or wants.
Ask them if they want to save the relationship. If they say yes, tell them (calmly) that you don't feel like they are putting forth the effort. Tell them exactly what you need from them, if possible. Couples counseling might be beneficial in this case. If they don't respond positively that they want to save the relationship, move on. You can't change their mind.
That definitely won't help, he'll just hate you and he'll feel hurt, almost as if you were cheating on him. Instead… he has to see that you are still emotionally available for him, you just need some space and time to heal after your break up. Hint him that you might like to get back together, but don't attack him about it. Give him space and see how he reacts.
my ex and i broke up a couple of months ago. He broke up with me because he did not want a relationship anymore and i cheated on him. We dated for almost two years..After our break up he wanted to be friends and i didn’t. i want to be more and this kept going back and forth. We did hu a couples of times and he would say i love you. He said he wanted something more but not a relationship and not exclusive. I told we can talk to be something or we don’t talk anymore so we agreed on not talking.. We were on good terms and we said i love you and stop talking for a few days. But i texted and he said he doesn’t want to talk to me and he doesn’t want to be friends anymore.. so i need advice should i just give him time and see what happens? what should i do? I still have feeling for this guy and i don’t know if he even does.
Look, I know how hard it is to not contact the one person on this earth you want to see and speak to more than anyone else. I fully get it. But just because we want something doesn’t mean it’s in our best interest to go after it. It’s like going to the gym. Sometimes it’s really hard to summon the strength to get yourself there, but you do it because your goal is to be fit and healthy. Here, your goal is to get your ex back and have a healthy, loving, mutually fulfilling relationship. That can only come about when you’ve taken time to gain clarity and perspective.
I care for him deeply and last text i saent was letting him know that im flad he is taking the time to get better and that nevertheless I miss his company and hope to meet soon on a positive note. He hasnt responded and I feel even worse… I miss him and do want him back or at least hope if he does the work on himself..he realizes what i brought to the relationship..is it too late for no contact in this situation. He is known for making rash decisions during times he is overwhlemed. This breakup however seems he has confirmed it as opposed to before he did this the first time…
Apologize. Think deeply about anything you did or didn't do that somehow contributed to the downfall of the relationship, and clean the slate by giving your ex a proper apology. Take full responsibility for the offense, without blaming your ex, giving excuses, or expecting an apology (or even forgiveness) in return. It may very well be that your ex contributed to the situation, but you cannot apologize for someone else; you can only apologize for yourself. Leave him or her out of it and odds are the apology will be reciprocated.
So my ex boyfriend and I were together for a year and 4 months. Honestly he was obsessed and so was I but i became too comfortable. He was my world and I never thought he would leave me. He would always chase after me and showering me with love and it made me the happiest person alive. One day he got tired of fighting with me and he dumped. told me he didnt want me anymore. I looked like a fool, i begged i cried i ran after him but he just walked away with his head up. it was so painfully. he blocked me on everything so i dont have contact but if i text him he will usually unblock to read my messages. it hurts so bad and as messed up as it is i still want him. I want him back so badly it kills.
Be honest about how you feel, within reason. Don't tell her what she might have done wrong in the relationship. Instead, focus on you. Let her know that you've thought a lot about where things went wrong, and show her all the ways in which you've changed. Tell her how you've become more patient, more forgiving, more aware of your own shortcomings, and be sure to back it up with action. If you say you've become more forgiving, be able to show her that you're not as quick to point out other peoples' faults.

I was with my ex for 9 years off and on. We broke up a lot. I was immature. Shes older. She told me I was her soul mate. I felt the same but couldnt show it. I would text her amazing words but when she would see me I couldnt back thenlm up or say them in person. I was depressed and lacked confidence. She finally had enough and told me she was done and I should move on. She has blocked me to and called me a stalker once or twice. Ive never even drove by her house or wrote her a letter. We were together 9 years! How can she call me a stalker? Because I love her and am trying to show her? Well, I realized in the last 3 months that I didnt appreciate her when I had the chance and I hurt her. I never gave her time or space enough to heal and so she took it. Now I dont think she has forgiven me for not giving her that space. I dont know. Fact is bro that women are capable of pure evil when they are hurt by the man they truly loved. When they stop talking all together its because they killed that amazing love they once cherished.
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