Don't try to save a relationship that's toxic or abusive. There's really no way to work on a relationship that's based on toxic patterns or abuse. No amount of working on communication techniques or trying to reignite the romance is going to make things better long-term. You may feel that you're getting something out of the relationship, but you have a lot more to gain by being free.

Make sure you want your ex boyfriend back for the right reasons. Are you really still in love with him? If so, it might be worth trying to get him back, by showing him you still care and that you believe things will be better this time. Sometimes breaking up provides time for both people to realize that, more than anything, they just want to be together again. However, if you have any other reason for wanting your ex back, reexamine whether it's a good idea to try to rekindle the relationship.

My ex and me were together for a lil over 4 months, last july we went to california and stayed with his family, after we got back he started acting distant, then he started hanging out with a girl, and kept sneaking off to go hangout with her, i asked him if he wanted us to workout, he said he didnt know what he wanted and he wanted to do his own thang, so i got upset and had a friend tell him i was seeing someone else, he got mad yelled at me and asked me who i kissed, who im dating, and who im cheating on him with, i wasn’t and there was no other guy, i loved him, i just wanted him to come back, well she broke up with him, then he came back to me and asked if we could work it out, i said yes, the next day he was back with her, so when he tried talking to me i was soo upset that i told him to just go be with her and to leave me alone, seeing them together everyday was killing me slowly i couldn’t eat or sleep or focus on my classes for my CNA, he ended up moving away with her Dec. 14, 2012, i was so sad after he left, i started pushing myself harder to get my CNA done, and on March 14, 2013 i passed, Im now a CNA which im very happy about, right now im working on getting a job and a place to live, he lives in Des Moines, i was thinking about moving there, but im heading back to sioux city, only because i dont know anybody in Des Moines, and i have friends and family in sioux city, I still miss him, I still love him, he wrote a friend of mine over facebook and he told her he still has feelings for me, i just wish that he would forget the past and we could start new, ya we had our ups and downs but what couple don’t, i wish that there was someone who could help me get him back i love him.
So if your relationship with your ex stayed the same after 6 months or after a year (in other words if it failed to evolve and grow), then it would have violated her desire for relationship progression. It would have made her realize that you are not the guy who’s going to give her a long-term partnership and finally a family. She would then have seen you as a poor suitor, dumped you and gone off to find a guy who shows more signs of commitment and long-term suitability.
For real, change yourself for the better; let him see that and he'll want to be part of it. But you won't let him back into your world overnight – even if you really, really want to get him back, don't. You both need some time to appreciate each other for other things then sex. And when the sex does come, it better be mind-blowing. Then again, don't be clingy and don't call him every day after that – love all over again – instead, take your time. Let him think about you and worry a bit.
Unfortunately, if he really wants to leave, there's nothing you can do to stop it. Even if you still love him deeply and want to continue, if he doesn't, it doesn't continue. However, you do have a right to get clarity from him. Try to agree to something that suits you both. Instead of moving out, consider sleeping in separate beds for a while, or agree to only talk about these matters on Thursdays, giving the two of you guaranteed peace of mind all the other days.

Thanks so much for this. I broke up with my boyfriend and want him back. We just kept arguing i was jealous.. he said he only had eyes for me me and i was the love of his life. It has hurt him so much i know.. but im so willing to change.. i followed your tips i look great, have fun and he still looks at me like i am the one but says sex with no emotional strings is how he wants to do it for now as he is still hurting and probablyv thinks ill do it all again..but i won’t.I hope he comes back totally.. at the moment im working on trying to get him tovstart taking me to his local bar with him again.. we went all the time before. im taking itvslowly anyway. I never want to hurt him again
I say all that to make the point that AS face-to-face is how getting a girl back generally happens, you’ll thus need to set up a meet with your ex during the course of your texting or calling sessions. You can’t skip directly TO that part, because you first need to build some positive vibes so that she actually WANTS to meet up when you ask her to, but inviting her to meet IS something that you’ll need to do once she’s enjoying the conversation.
Dear heavenly father, as I come to you today to ask for guidance and strength to strengthen my relationship Lord I can’t do this alone. I Need Your Loving Arms to keep us focused on you through this difficult time lord. We both have extremely busy schedules so it’s hard for us to see each other Lord and during those busy times we tend to argue more when we deeply love each other Lord come into our lives show us what we need to do to continue going the way that you want us to go, Lord. In Jesus name Amen.
Seriously though, if you see any book, product or article that guarantees that it can get you your ex back 100% of the time you should stop and realize that you are probably about to look at something that was made up just to get you to buy it or read it. Ironically, a lot of the stuff out there that makes these ridiculous claims offer no value and leave you feeling taken advantage of.
Español: recuperar a una chica, Português: Fazer uma Garota Voltar para Você, Italiano: Riconquistare una Ragazza, Deutsch: Ein Mädchen zurück gewinnen, Русский: вернуть девушку, Français: reconquérir une fille, 中文: 赢回一个女生, Nederlands: Je vriendin weer terugkrijgen, Čeština: Jak získat svoji dívku zpět, Bahasa Indonesia: Merebut Kembali Hati Seorang Gadis, हिन्दी: दोबारा किसी लड़की का दिल जीतें, ไทย: ชนะใจแฟนสาวอีกครั้ง, العربية: استرجاع فتاتك مجددا, Tiếng Việt: Chinh phục bạn gái cũ, 한국어: 여자친구 다시 돌아오게 하는 방법, 日本語: 元彼女とよりを戻す

Focus on patterns. Rather than blaming each other, consider how patterns from each of you has led to problems. For instance, maybe you consistently forget to call home when you're going to be late, and your partner then gets upset when you don't show up. Consequently, you punish him or her the next time by not calling home, which is a cyclical pattern. When you bring it up, focus on how to solve the problem, such as "I will try to be better about calling home, if maybe you can forgive me the few times that I forget. Or maybe you can send me a text near the end of the day, so I will be more aware of what time it is."[10]


It is sad to see there are 60% relationships in America that ends up in divorce. Therefore, my main objective of creating this website is to help all women in understanding the inner working of male psychology. The cutting-edge techniques you discover in this website will not only help you in getting your ex boyfriend back but also help you in making your relationship stronger than ever before.
Now, I know that is easier said than done. Accepting “what is” requires putting down your judgments and assessment of things as good or bad. And, that can be extremely difficult to do especially when society has trained us from birth to call certain things good, righteous, and desirable and other things bad, wrong, or detestable – and has also taught us that being in a romantic relationship is the most noteworthy human accomplishment.
me and my ex, got back like 3 months ago,is a relation of 11 years ago :D bt we were breaking up and come again several times before. he came back to me, and kept contact most of the time, asking me out, and texting me non stop, we met couple of times, he told me about his ex gf he met and about details between them, also that she didnt fit him, and she wasnt right for him, and after couple of outings, ofcourse i did wt mentioned, looked my best, smelled amazing, and yes he stared at me, i try to look the best when we meet, and he keeps staring at me, but sometimes i feel he has distance between me and him, he doesnt call often, i sometimes call, we had couple of arguments but solved out, when im upset of him he make things up, we have kissed couple of times, and he started not me actually, it feels better than before, no fights, no attitude, i try to make it right, i try not to confuse him, and if i do i turn the page and make it better, but when i disappear or not talk, he comes to me, he asks, and when we meet he says all his feelings llike : imiss you, i want you, im thinking about you. sometimes is confusing, bcs i dont know it goin, but i dont wanna lose him this time, and think about me more and to see the best in me than his ex. he confessed to me that she lied to him with “iluv you” and then left him, when i just at the 1st place was crying to him when we were together to stay. i know i was stupid. but now am different. i need some help. why he is not calling much? what shoud i do? and about marriage, he mentioned in our last meet, but was not clear.is there any help? shoud i mention the marriage thing? or not? thanks alot waiting ur answer
That’s really the main aim in Step 8 here – ensure that you don’t make mistakes which would accidentally sabotage the natural getting-back-together process. There’s several common mistakes most guys make at this exact point, and it’s super important that you know WHAT those mistakes are so that you don’t fall victim to them like most do. If you’re not told what these mistakes are, I honestly believe that you WOULD fall victim to them, so let’s discuss them right now.
My boyfriend of seven months broke up with me two days ago. We were really good together, we had a great complicity, friendship, we were always there for each other and like best friends. What went wrong is that I have important anxiety issues and i’ve let them get the best of me and take over our relationship. I have a lot of fears, of abandonment and such. We were constantly fighting because of this, and I believe he did his best to be patient and there for me. My anxieties were mostly caused by the fact that it took him a long time to be ready for a relationship in the beggining, plus he wasnt totally over his ex. He eventually got there but I never completely calmed down about this, until it was already too late.
When negative things happen, avoid being critical or contemptuous. Don’t say things that begin with “You never…,” “You always…,” or (my favorite) “You’re such a…” Calmly explain why you see the situation, not the spouse, as negative, and why it upsets you. In the ensuing conversation don’t get defensive, but don’t refuse to talk, either. Inject a little positivity into the conversation or argument. For example, try a little humor to lighten up the situation a bit, if you think your spouse would be receptive. If the humor backfires, simply be honest and explain that you want to diffuse the tension and you really don’t want to fight.
Hello everyone, I must start by saying that I didn’t go into marriage with expectation that it will fail after 8 years. I and my spouse where not compassionate to ourselves. Trying to work out my marriage was self-defeating, we don’t really know why we no longer find ourselves attractive anymore. All we secretly thought was divorce, we couldn’t agree or communicate anymore, it was emotionally difficult moments when we face each other in the bedroom.
Dear God, I have hit rock bottom. I have nowhere to turn and nobody to rely on. You are my rock. You are the only way. I am here no on my knees… holding back the flood of tears. Give me wisdom to save my relationship with my boyfriend Willie.I want him back in my life. I love him lord. I don’t want Willie to go to another woman/girl. I really really want him back. Please Lord Strengthten our Relationship and strengthen our love lord. I know only you can save this. I beg up you. I plead with you. Show us a better way together. Please open his heart to my love and your forgiveness. Please touch his soul at this very moment. Where ever he is and what he is doing… touch him Lord. Help him see we need to save this love. Please, I ask and pray with all the strength that you are giving me just to be able to breathe. i am lost without him. Lord I need him. I need to feel your love with him. Dear Lord I pray. Please give me the right words, guide me to help save our relationship. Show me how strong I can be through you. My tears soak my spirit, my heart is breaking. I cannot hold on. I feel like every ounce of life is draining from me. Renew me. Renew me. Make him see. Use us as an example of how forgiveness and your love can save and change people. Help him rebuke satan and his temptations. I love him so dear Lord. I will honor you with my love for him. Give me this chance. Please reach out to him now and help him see we need to save this. I love you Lord. I will never doubt your ability. Please do this. Save us. Please. I beg u Lord..
I have one for you guys! I started dating this girl that in my mind is the perfect one! I mean I couldnt possibly build a better woman. Well after 4 years of dating we broke up because she was tired of my habbits.!? Well we have been broken up now for three years and she still calls and texts every day. When I go to her house for the night she sleeps in her bed alone. She helps me in any way I need. (Bails me outta jail, pays my phone bill, buys me sweet gifts, ect.)
Honestly, it is hard to think of any disadvantages when using text messages. Texting is the communication highway for today’s couples. You and your boyfriend probably texted each other all the time and rarely shared them with anyone. Basically texting is super intimate. You can share cute pictures and do all sorts of really fun things. Not to mention it is impossible to raise your voice over a text message. However, I would say the biggest advantage to text messaging would be the fact that you can take your time and think everything through. This is something that calling on the phone won’t allow you.
Español: recuperar a una chica, Português: Fazer uma Garota Voltar para Você, Italiano: Riconquistare una Ragazza, Deutsch: Ein Mädchen zurück gewinnen, Русский: вернуть девушку, Français: reconquérir une fille, 中文: 赢回一个女生, Nederlands: Je vriendin weer terugkrijgen, Čeština: Jak získat svoji dívku zpět, Bahasa Indonesia: Merebut Kembali Hati Seorang Gadis, हिन्दी: दोबारा किसी लड़की का दिल जीतें, ไทย: ชนะใจแฟนสาวอีกครั้ง, العربية: استرجاع فتاتك مجددا, Tiếng Việt: Chinh phục bạn gái cũ, 한국어: 여자친구 다시 돌아오게 하는 방법, 日本語: 元彼女とよりを戻す
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My girlfriend and I broke up a month and a half ago, we were talking frequently until 3 weeks ago when she moved to Portland, OR (we lived in California together). Last week she started dating another guy and I freaked out, text her (nothing mean) said “wow, that was fast” she got extremely pissed and blocked my number and Facebook. Do I still have a chance at getting her back? I made a lot of mistakes after the breakup, begging to come back to her, argued a couple times, freaked about her dating. I wrote her 2 letters but didn’t send either one yet. One is a love letter and the other is an apology letting her know I accept the breakup and wish her the best.
Send her a letter. Girls also love letters, because they take a lot of time and you have to express your feelings. Start off by saying something like: "I know this letter doesn't fix what's broken between us, and maybe it never will. But I want you to know that I care deeply about you, and I always will. That part has never changed. The part that's changed is that I realize how stupid I was to let you go."
I’m in the same exact boat as you. My ex and I were together almost 4 months, we were amazing together till he started working again. Then we were fighting all the time. He accused me of cheating when I would’ve never have even thought to do that. I love him with all my heart. We’ve been broke up 2 weeks and more drama happened and now I don’t even know if I’ll ever have him back. Because before all the drama happened on Saturday he told his friend he was going to take me back in a week or two, he just needed more time. I love him with all my heart. I had to start the NC over again, so I’m only on day 7. Did any of this work for you? I’m scared and hurt, can’t help but have hope though. Only thing making me feel partially okay
If a couple works at being together and trying to understand each other, they may well succeed. I have to admit I feel a little uncertain about this matter. I think if a relationship can be made to work, each person should give it a good try. On the other hand, I don’t think anyone should settle for someone who has to be coaxed into caring for him or her. (c) Fredric Neuman.  Follow Dr. Neuman's blog at fredricneumanmd.com/blog or ask advice at fredricneumanmd.com/blog/ask-dr-neuman-advice-column/
If you’ve been answering yes to lots of the questions above, then it’s likely that you’ll answer yes to this one too. Why? Because believing that your girlfriend is the most suitable partner you could realistically get, creates a scarcity mindset around attractive women which brings out all the needy, desperate and try-hard (i.e. unattractive) behaviors that we discussed above.
He broke up with me first: he said that it was because he felt like we didn’t have a future together, that it felt impossible that i learned the language ( which i was doing), that I was asking for too much of his time, that he didn’t feel like he could do all the things he wanted with his friends. but I couldn’t accept it, I wanted to fight for the love we had, so much, I negociated, I asked for more time, I begged, I told him that if he still loved me it would be worth it. after a day of speaking he said ok. A week after I asked him again ( because I was afraid and I had been walking on eggshells all week), he said that he still had that feeling that we wouldn’t be together forever, but he told me he loved me and he really wanted to work for it, to work on it and make it work! ( i was so happy!)

Got a text from my GF immediately returning from a vacation together. She said she didn’t feel as invested in our relationship as I did. We’d been dating 2 and a half months, extremely attracted to each other, the sex was incredible for the both of us, & we spent a good bit of time together. Within the first month, she was talking about settling down & getting a place together. Admittedly, I was a little taken back by it, but handled it appropriately. Obviously it showed she had been rather interested in me and then some. The breakup happened via text as I said before & about not being as invested in me as I was with her. Not even a week later, she’s already texting me & admittedly I respond, but it’s usually silly stuff. I want to be back with her in the worst way but can’t get a good read on what the hell happened or what’s happening? Any recommendations on how to proceed? Thanks.

You have the attraction back by this point already from the previous steps, so most of what you need to do now is just get out of your own way, and let the getting-back-together process happen on its own. In other words, you need to know what mistakes to AVOID, to prevent yourself from sabotaging the getting-back-together process, which is supposed to happen fairly naturally after the first 7 steps.
it has been difficult at times to accept the fact from him that his father would never be ready to accept our relationship. in other words, i am scared to fall apart without him. although i neglect the fact that i am not much attached to him. but all these words are utterly false whereas i am deeply in love with him and fail to imagine my life without him. Father,my lord,its true i have never longed for him and now the situation is when i don’t want to abandon him. i love him. i really love him and want to hold him closer to me for ever and ever after.
Sorry I know this is ridiculous and LONG. So its been a week since he dumped me, all my friends are telling me to forget him and move on. That if he wanted to be with me he would. I just cant..i even took your advice and went on a date last weekend and it only made me miss him more. I want to reach out to him now. I was thinking about leaving a voicemail directly. I want him to hear my voice and hear me explain. My friends said not to, but i think it may help if he really hears me. All our stupid fighting has been through text and I think that only makes things worse. Any advice would be great!
It feels like not being able to breathe when a good man leaves you. He’s put up with me for so many years, i’m so sorry for everything. i fked up i was naggy, unappreciative, rude, and not available to him emotionally i was pushing him away he was such a sweet heart and i always found something to argue with him about i took what we had for granted we took a break for a while and decided to try again start from the beginning..we went out had fun and i fell into my old way got mad and argued about soemthing so stupid.
I kept thinking that she was crazy, and she was convinced that I was stupid. I was walking on eggshells because she was just so prickly. We never had sex anymore and we didn’t agree on anything. Technically we were living in a sexless marriage. Many of our fights (over little things) ended with one of us casually suggesting that divorce might be the answer. It hurt. When I thought of divorce, and the end of my family, I thought, How did we get to this? (Stopping the Fighting is the FIRST thing you need to do as I talk about in my article How to Fix a Broken Marriage)
Ok, so I met my dream man and we started dating. I have not dated much, so am really naive when it comes to men and dating, but we were going great together and planing ahead for weekends away. We were dating for two months when he just ended it out of the blue without any reason at all. I had to hear through second hand stories that he thought I was childish and he did not like the way I treated my mom. I was told he did not want anything to do with me. He did not want to see me or speak to me. I tried contacting but he just ignored me. We have been broken up now for six weeks and my heart is in pieces. I have no idea why he broke my heart and I have to admit I have been trying very hard to get him to explain or at least meet up and tell me face to face. I am now told again through second hand stories that he has met someone new and that he is happy, but his family does not approve of her and they have all turned their back on him. They were not happy when we split up at all as they say he was clearly happy with me. Now I am left wondering what the hell went wrong and trying to pick up a broken heart. Everyone seems to have their own ideas and when ever I say I would like to try and see him they just keep telling me that he does not want me and I am being childish. I must grow up. Sorry, but my heart is broken for no reason and he hides behind others instead of just telling my why! I don’t know if I even have a remote chance of getting him back but I really hope I do as he is my whole world. I have waited for this man my whole life and when we were together it was as if we were meant to be. You just know when you have met the right man. I just wish he would talk to me as I get the feeling there is more to this then meets the eye. I am a blonde and fare and the girl he is dating now is dark so totally apposite to me. Some says it is out of spite for everyone, but I ask why? I read this article and hope perhaps it might work, but not sure if it would. Think I am not going to be so lucky as he is very stubborn as well.
“I was absolutely crushed when my boyfriend broke up with me seemingly out of the blue. Beyond devastated. I read so many articles on how to get your ex back but they all seemed so stupid. Then I found you guys. I read what you wrote about the no contact rule, and also questions to ask before getting back together with an ex and my mind was blown. I followed your advice to a T and when I was feeling really strong, I contacted him. We ended up meeting for a drink and he said I seemed different, more relaxed and comfortable with myself. We didn’t dive right back in, it was a slow process but it felt so different the second time. I didn’t feel so needy and terrified of losing him and everything just felt different. Anyway, we’ve been going strong for two years now and are looking for a place to move into together and I owe it all to you!”
If your partner seems to no longer care about the outcome of a fight, or if they seem to feel as though trying to find a solution to your problems is pointless or hopeless, then that can be a clear indication of deeper troubles. When this kind of despair sets in, your partner may withdraw further and feel as though there will never be a way for the two of you to live together in peace. That’s obviously not a good thing, and it’s something that you need to work on if this has become a problem in your marriage.
My boyfriend and I broke up 4 days ago.i left him bc he wasnt appreciating me enough and then the next day i decided i wanted to be back together and just try and work through things as a couple.he has been ignoring all of my phone and won’t speak to me at all.we work together so things are ten times harder I just want him back we have been through so much and I just can’t picture my life without him. he has told me this is it but we have done this so many times its almost a weekly thing. This time i went way to far though after being rejected by him the last time I lied to him by telling him he was a terrible boyfriend and even worse in bed(complete lied ,he rocked my world) I just wanted to hit below the belt and make him feel how I was feeling.I also lied and told him i had been cheating on him this whole time. Sounds crazy i know I just lost it. I really hopes this works bc i don’t want to loose the love of my life,my bestfriend,my soulmate all bc I lost it .any words of advice?
Some of these problems include conflicts about who does what about the house or who decides what to do on a particular weekend.  Other problems dissolve when it is understood– however long it takes to make the other person understand– just how strongly that person feels about certain matters. Examples of these solvable problems are: how much time one person spends at work or away from the other, which chores are really very difficult for the other person, how much sex they should have, how to handle disobedient children, how to spend money as investments or on vacation, how messy or clean the house should be, who does the cleaning, how to deal with fears of one sort or another. One spouse is not made weaker by considering what the other needs or wants.
My relationship was an open one. We had an argument and i wanted to broke up but went back after 2 days. I later took some space without telling him, its been on for about 4 months. So we didn’t break up but I’m worried he thinks so. He called first one month after the space but i didn’t pick or chat with him. Then 2 weeks later he called again and i picked, we talk for a while about nothing important but didn’t call again. Then sent Christmas and new year message which i replied but nothing else. Then 2 weeks after that i sent him birthday message and called once but he never picked or called back. But 5 days ago he called and sounded so quiet,l. The conversation was really short, i was nice and i didn’t ask to meet him either but right now I’m really worried if things will never improve. We normally use to chat on WhatsApp and i haven’t received a message from him. I don’t know if i should still keep holding on or to move on.

I went out with my ex girlfriend for 9years an have 3 wonderful kids with her we had our ups an downs the last 2 years were mostly downs an a lot of fighting we really weren’t talking so she broke up with me for about 7-8 months I did the whole crying asking her for that one chance trying to keep my family together she is really my first love I know what I did wrong an I’m trying to change an understand what I’ve done wrong well we both move out of the place we lived together she went back with her mother an I got my own place I still love her but I just found out she started dating just dating an I’ve seen a couple of women but I still have strong feelings for her she won’t talk to me an when she does she gets angry quick she gets jealous when I say I’m with a friend an she turns around an try’s to make me jealous in return why would she do that I just wanna know if I still have a chance what can I do an if I don’t should I just move on please help
Recently just told him im fed up of him not making effort. He spends time with other people and not me. This is a little weird I know. Told him We need to talk (txt). He act txted back” out free Sat” I just replied i am going away for 2 weeks. He probably thinks its the truth. Space is what I needed. Yes I am playing hard to get. To smooth it all out/ Been crazy. He been going out ALOT. Changing his fb pic and not attending skype AT ALL!.
I came across a website that suggested that Lord Spiritual can help fix broken marriages and get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!!that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before, All thanks to Lord Spiritual. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Lord Spiritual is a real and powerful spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your ex back or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster now.
I still obsess (2 months) about the relationship. I miss being a part of a family, I miss having dinner with him, the sex was mindblowing, sleeping next to him, the lazy weekends and the busy doing things together weekends, waiting for him to come home from work, I miss “our” home, his daughters, his family, Sunday afternoon cookouts at his moms…. I still have the most horrible days when I believe it was all my fault and I was just not good enough and will never be good enough for anyone. I let him do that to me. And yes, I sometimes want that back, him back… Yet, somehow I know that, eventually I will be ok, better than ever. Wish it would get here faster! 

I’m devasted, we broke up more than a month now. We have been together for 5months. I got out of a previous relationship of 7years that had more bad than good times so I ended it. Met my now ex unexpectedly after a month. We connected immediately, like we understand each other. It was so weird, I will get myself ready to say something and he would think the very same thing. I experienced real love with this man for the first time in my life and we have been through a lot during our time of dating. Then the drama started. He accused me of cheating on him, I not that type of girl, why would I cheat on him his the greatest thing that I’ve had. So he left me, I love him and I know he loves me too although I heard his very happy. How do I prove my innocence or do I just leave it go on as difficult as it is and let things sort themselves out. I love him and do not want to lose him, I know for a fact I’m the 1st woman he loved in his life. I have not made contact with him. I feel hurt that he will accuse me on of such a thing. How do I handle the situation.
Now the remaining part of this website will show you psychological and practical strategies for how to get your ex-boyfriend back that you can work with to remove the feelings of neediness and insecurity. It doesn’t matter how dreadful you are feeling inside you these strategies will surely reverse the feeling of rejection that your ex boyfriend wants you to feel. This will shift the balance of power back in your relationship.
Our third attempt—and, you guessed it, the ensuing breakup—was kind of a glitch in the space-time continuum. It was 2009, and at this point I’d realized Mary was not an easy person to please. I coasted through the relationship, and she called me out where other girls I’d been with brushed off my repeated bad behavior. Our second breakup had reinforced the notion that no relationship comes easy and you have to put in the work, but I still sucked.
Our third attempt—and, you guessed it, the ensuing breakup—was kind of a glitch in the space-time continuum. It was 2009, and at this point I’d realized Mary was not an easy person to please. I coasted through the relationship, and she called me out where other girls I’d been with brushed off my repeated bad behavior. Our second breakup had reinforced the notion that no relationship comes easy and you have to put in the work, but I still sucked.
Seeing that your ex-girlfriend is moving on by getting into a relationship with another guy can be extremely disheartening, and you may think that all hope is lost. That’s not necessarily the case. Rebound relationships are prevalent when one person doesn’t want to work on the issues that came up during their breakup, and rebound relationships simply don’t last. By diving into a new relationship, your ex is trying to avoid dealing with her feelings for you. That new relationship simply won’t measure up.

Yes, it’s no secret that an increase in the frequency and intensity of arguments with your partner are a clear indication that all is not well with your marriage. Now, don’t panic here just because you and your spouse are fighting a few times a week… every married couple will disagree and have conflicts from time to time, and it’s actually a healthy thing to argue now and then as long as they lead to resolutions or don’t leave lingering hard feelings.
Please hear my prayer my boyfriend of 12 yrs is cheating on me . We have two kids together. I love him so much that I’m willing to forgive him and keep my family together . He’s my best friend and I feel like I’ve lost him . Lord Jesus I ask that to clear his mind and realize that he has true love at home , please lord bring him back home to his family and remove this woman out his life who’s interfering with what we have which is a beautiful family.
She’s playing with you until she get what she wants from someone else. You are her comfort zone you know each other so she is just there with you after what she thinks is good is not. She she leave it becaue she thinks she found the one to replace you then she finds out the grass is not greener on the other side so she comes back. She is blaming you for cheating because she is not being 100% with you about what she is doing. She don’t want to have sex due to the fact thst she don’t want no emotional connection with you because she might find someone else and it will be hard to leave if there is emotionally attached to you.

He broke up with me last Monday after 1 year and 3 months, for me it was the happiest time of my life and we never fought and had a happy and loving relationship. Reading this has really helped me as I’m going into my second week of NC tomorrow. I genuinely think we both needed a break but I’m not going to sit here and believe that we’re gonna get back together I’m just going to do my 4 Week Detox, then go from there. Wish me luck . X


You have spent a month not contacting your ex. You spent that entire time working on yourself becoming more and more confident as the days past. Everything seemed to be going fine until you hit your first road block with a negative response. Make no mistake about it, negative responses are never good. However, they don’t EVER mean that you should give up right away. It just means you have to be smarter about how you approach things. Lets take a look at a negative response example (from my past) this is a true story.
How long does it take for him to contact you. Me and my Ex of four ex broke up three weeks ago bc of constant fighting even though we both admitted we still loved each other and one week after the fight he starts hanging out and dating this troll. i contacted once to be a psycho path and then after I apologized and I told him I was happy for him and I hope he gets to be happy.
I left my cheating ex and gave him a chance, we got serious and introduced each other to our families and parents. The 1st year of the relationship was amazing, he would bring roses when he visited, take me for romantic dinners, send romantic texts and call me and speak for hours. As time passed things started getting different…feeling different…He never made me feel special like before and I was afraid I was losing him, which in a way made me angry and I started arguments and fights with him all the time..In the past 3 and a half years we’ve broken up every year before christmas and new year..he left…after 6months he would come back…Last year when he came back,we promised each other that we would never let our relationship go through that ever again…few months down the line…I could feel that we were taking each other for granted again…He never use to call me, he was too tired or too busy to text me..He always had excuses when it came to weekends for us to spend time together…It made me feel unimportant and as if he had met someone else…though I knew deep down he was never one to cheat, assuming,crazy thoughts and anger caused us to fight constantly,but still we loved each other very much…September last year he was writing exams and told me that he will not have anytime for me, It hurt but i understood because I knew it was important to him..Until I found pictures of him on social networks at clubs with his friends…which tore me to pieces..He lied!! Were his friends,drinking and clubbing more important to him then me? I am 22 years old and since I met him I gave up all my friends and clubbing for him,because he didnt like that…I would pine and crave to be with him and see him or even hear his voice…but all I would get from him was excuses.. Earlier Last year he spoke to me about getting engaged and starting a life together and of how much he loves me….November last year he called it quits when he found out that I had one of his male friends in whatsapp(innocently),I would never cheat on him,leave alone that…with his friend…Since then Ive tried everything possible to make things right, met with his parents,sent texts,tried calling, even drove out to a place nearby to where he lives and texted him to say Im waiting to talk to him…he ignored me every single time…xmas passed,so did new year…still nothing…then I realised I was hurting myself more by trying and getting rejected all the time, even after finding out he had a profile on a dating network, I still forgave and tried…I stopped contacting him for 2weeks,…a week back I received 2 missed calls from him, I regreted that I missed his call but I did not try and call back, I msg’d him a day after and he responded…that gave me a little hope that there was still something between us…After that I havent contacted him until lastnight when I couldnt stop thinking about him and decided to send him an I miss you msg…a beeeeeg mistake!!! I wasnt very happy with his reply and in an emotional state I replied with a nasty msg…I think I just made things worse… Im at that very hurt and confused stage right now… where when I think about all the things he has done to hurt me it makes me feel as If I dont want to be with him,but deep down inside I know how much I love him and that I can forgive him for anything because the love is enough, He still keeps in contact with my family and my mum, not to sure if thats a good thing… I will try your tips and hope it works:-) Ive now realised that he knows exactly how I feel about him and that I want a long lasting relationship with him, but Ive tried and Ive done my part…I cant be rejected every single day when I try to contact him…HIS NOT A NEED IN MY LIFE….BUT I DO WANT HIM TO BE IN MY LIFE…I love him alot, but you cant force someone to be with you if they dont want to…the time apart(breaking off contact) may bring him back or may help me get over him….If its meant to be it will be….
If you show her that you’re sad, you’re proving that you cared about her. If she sees you cry, she’ll know that leaving you had an effect on you. She wants to know that she was cared for even if she’s not interested in being with you right now. This proves that you weren’t just a waste of her time and that you were just as invested in the relationship as she was.
I don’t know if I have done the right thing. I sent my ex an email to say that I didn’t want to leave things on a bad note and that I hope one day he finds that special girl that will make him happy and one that will understand him as he is special and a complex person and that there is only one of him. That in time hopefully we will be able to become friends. Ended with all the best…Have I done the wrong thing as he didn’t answer me and I know he has read the message??
Usually, men that follow my recommendations are able to get their girlfriends back very fast. Some see results in 14 days, others – in a couple of months. I love to hear back from men who have mastered the technique described in “Ways To Influence a Woman”, when they write to tell me how drastically their relationship changed. I’m very happy to hear that they get more attention and love from their girlfriends.
Showering your ex with affection has the same effect of the first three deadly sins. Trying to convince your ex that he should be with you by giving him all the attention, pouring compliments over him, sending him love notes or whatever will not work. The only way your ex will be convinced of your value is if you make yourself valuable, not if you demean yourself and act out of needy desperation.
I love the no contact rule blog post!! And it really showed me some insights, thanks so much for that. Two weeks ago I broke up. I have to deal with the fact that he’s biking through my street to work every morning and evening. One time he was biking by and we saw each other and he waved, well i just crashed.. the other day we bumped into each other. This doesn’t really help me in my process to be honoust. Can I text him and ask if he could take another way to work maybe or what should I do about this?
Today, I’ve got the usual habit to clear his Hotmail inbox and I realized that he’d booked two tickets to a horror late night movie yesterday. And at this point of time, I might have guess that he’s watching it with the girl whom he previously had dinner with. Somehow, I felt that he might have taken a slight interest in this girl colleague and have decided to move on and try out dating the new girl since he’s so firm with his decision on ending off the relationship with me and see no future in us after all that we’ve been through and in such a short period of time?
I really enjoyed this article. It made me feel better about my situation perhaps hopeful. My boyfriend I started dating over 4 1/2 years ago and he broke up with me six months ago. Since then we’ve seen each other quite a few times. But it’s been difficult . Shortly after breakinh up it came up in conversation that he was no longer in love with me. Of course I was shocked because I couldn’t understand how someone could fall out of love so quickly. Since then we’ve met on several occasions. we don’t argue anymore and things are generally amicable between us.
I’m in the same exact boat as you. My ex and I were together almost 4 months, we were amazing together till he started working again. Then we were fighting all the time. He accused me of cheating when I would’ve never have even thought to do that. I love him with all my heart. We’ve been broke up 2 weeks and more drama happened and now I don’t even know if I’ll ever have him back. Because before all the drama happened on Saturday he told his friend he was going to take me back in a week or two, he just needed more time. I love him with all my heart. I had to start the NC over again, so I’m only on day 7. Did any of this work for you? I’m scared and hurt, can’t help but have hope though. Only thing making me feel partially okay
My girlfriend told me she did not love me the same way she used to. That I was more of a best friend type of love… She has new friends that go out alot and she also started to drink socially.. Im not sure this is a cry for independence or because her parents do not a good relationship . So i wondered if she imprinted her dads action on to me as I would treat her as he treats her and her mom….. I tried telling her I could do things differently and so on but she starts med school soon and I am not sure if she wants to be independent or what… I have not texted her and deleted my own facebook to avoid contact. She didnt cheat, we didnt end on a argument. I was the one who said okay goodbye. And thats the last time I talked to her ( 2 weeks ago). Any ideas on what i should do?
My situation is a little different than most, we’ve been together for 5 years and he’s currently in the military now, he just ended things, with multiple reasoning but the last one was him saying he didn’t have time for a girlfriend nor did he want one. It’s been a week since we broke up and also a week of NC, I haven’t reached out, but is this going to work, is he really going to miss me even with us being so far away and his schedule being so hectic?? Please someone give me some advice…
Français: sauver son couple, Italiano: Salvare una Relazione, Español: salvar una relación, Deutsch: Wie man eine Beziehung rettet, Português: Salvar um Relacionamento, Русский: спасти отношения, 中文: 挽救一段感情, Bahasa Indonesia: Menyelamatkan Hubungan, Nederlands: Een relatie redden, Tiếng Việt: Cứu vãn một Mối Quan hệ, ไทย: รักษาความสัมพันธ์, Čeština: Jak zachránit vztah, العربية: إنقاذ علاقة عاطفية
I was insecurebecause usually he’ll call me on lunch time then became like I haven’t got any calls till come home late at night such as 2 a.m. then I get frustrated and let him sleep out in the carthen I get emotional and let him in the house then I just felt like I wasn’t his girlfriend.it was a Friday night he was supposed to come from normal time and bring dinner to he didn’t come the next day so I went to work came home and all his clothes where gone no calls are text message from him.. I had complain a lot.. what should I do to get b him back to love we again.. I’m going to do the no contact b rule ima follow those steps and see how it goes
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My suggestion, from a male perspective, having sex immediately once you meet up again may be a wrong choice. Even if you've been together for a long time before, it's good to make everything seem new, and different. If he messed up, and that's the reason you broke up, you shouldn't make it that easy for him to get back together. Throw in some temptation.
Following this advice helped me save my relationship. At the start I the break up I was messaging him a lot and begging to get back together. I looked stupid. After reading this I tried the no contact rule and focused on bettering myself and finding distractions when I felt the urge to talk to him. Just pretending to move on helped me feel a lot better about myself. We were later forced to work together and I kept my head up ignored him the best I could besides work relations and showed him that I can move on. Shortly after that he broke down to me about missing me and doing anything to have me back.
So I dated this girl for 8 month got engaged n she prego and she broke up with me cuz I want to talk I showed to the bar cuz she meet her mom there n I talk to her mom saying let me talk to her first but I cud wait so I drove n her mom told me to leave so I did. But then Sunday she told me to move I did she doesn’t want nothing to do with me. I need help with this one
When you go out or have new experiences, take pictures of your new and improved appearance. When you’re doing your favourite things, take a picture. You can also take pictures with your friends. Be happy. Then post on social media like instagram or facebook. This will help you attract new friends too! Your ex may or may not see these photos. Who cares? You’re enjoying yourself and you will attract more like-minded people. But please don’t post too much. Posting once every two days is a good amount to not annoy others while showing your amazing life.
Honestly, it is hard to think of any disadvantages when using text messages. Texting is the communication highway for today’s couples. You and your boyfriend probably texted each other all the time and rarely shared them with anyone. Basically texting is super intimate. You can share cute pictures and do all sorts of really fun things. Not to mention it is impossible to raise your voice over a text message. However, I would say the biggest advantage to text messaging would be the fact that you can take your time and think everything through. This is something that calling on the phone won’t allow you.

Hi… my boyfriend quit relationship with me because i wrote to him too much messages and he was tired , i arguing and blaming him one week and the second week i apologised, i have changable mood, at last he told me it was normal relationshi and i woud not change, i told him albad words i wrote thousand messages , so he blocked me, then i begged from others mobiles he blocked me everywhere almost 30 peoples mobile, after one month no contact, i wrote to him, he wrote some short messages, then as i blamed him again he continued blocking, would he come back in my life again?
what if he doesnt want to b with u..??what if u r ready to forgive him for his every faults even ready to say sorry infinite times without my fault but he is not ready to feel regret for anything he did with me to hurt me…what if u want him for whole ur life but he doesnt ready to listen ur voice ….what if u wana do everything anything for him but he hate ur every action and ur feelings……???
Luckily, the period of no contact will give you the time to put in place practices and structures to help you drop your stories and see things in a more positive light. Journaling, meditating, and yoga also helps. Maybe it sounds a little too new-age for you, but intense emotional experiences can send your thoughts into overdrive, so it’s really important to try and find a stillness within and learn to quiet your mind, or at least slow it down a bit.
Dear Havenly father I pray for my relationship that is falling apart my boyfriend is sleeping around with other woman help me God to restore our relationship we know one another for 18years we not married but lived together in the beginning was our lives beautiful know is a mess God I love this man please help me i pray that God is with us and help us God forgive me what ever wrong i did in our relationship please lord i beg and plead in your name let us become as one amen in Jesus i pray thank you lord
Here’s my problem, I was begging, pleading, and trying to look pity for my ex-girlfriend just to make her stay. We had sex then goodbye. Then i saw your videos about No Contact Rules. Following your advice about no contact rules was hard as hell. My target is FULL 30 DAYS no contact but in my two weeks of battle. Suddenly she texted me, i try to ignore her, then she call me using other number so we talked since its likely rude to ignore her at all. She told me she wasn’t happy in her new bf. She felt sorry for me. She’s asking me if there was any chance to rebuild our relationship?Is she still welcome to my life? I told her i am awesome now, i currently dating to someone else the she get madly jealous. She doesn’t want me to date others.She really want to see me but ill be the one who refuse to see her. I told her i will only see you when you come back to me. She wanted me to stick around but u said to your videos not to get in friendzone.
The relationship is going really well in the beginning. You are seeing each other often and enjoy one another. You begin to prioritize him over other things going on in your life, like hobbies or nights out with friends. You tell yourself you are comfortable and don’t need to be “out there.” Everything is just the way you like it until … for some reason, you feel him pulling away.
Hi I need ur advice can u able to help me I want my bf back he don’t break up with me but have affair with other girl and say ones he break up with her than think for me when ever he marry just marry with me not her so y at present he talk with that girl y he is not with me and all his friends post on that girls time line and that girl send me pics off my bf with her I really need help pls if possibal replay me by mail I need help I want my bf back with me any how I will do it plz so me a track to get him back …
Me and my ex broke up about 4 months ago. I was truly deeply in love with him and he said he loved me too. We lost our virginity to each other. This past summer I went on a vacation to Hawaii and he went on a vacation to Wisconsin. He left two days before I got back. We had been going out for 7 and a half months and we stared having sex at the 3 month mark. The first time we saw each other after we both got back from our trips, we hung out and I was planning on having sex with him that night, he acted like everything was fine when I went to pick him up by making out with me, picking me up and spinning me around. We went out though and he sat me down and said we needed to talk. Right then i knew something was wrong. He broke up with me with the phrase “I’ve fallen out of love with you.” I was crushed. I have no idea if this could have been caused by him doing something with someone else and feeling guilty about it so he broke up with me or if he had found someone else but I am still deeply in love with him and dreams about him nightly. I want him back so bad. He broke up with me on June 22 and I haven’t actually spoken to him since. I sent him a happy birthday wish because I thought that would be a nice things to do since his birthday is the day before mine even though we weren’t together anymore and never got a response back from him. I don’t know if that was a smart decision but I really miss him and want him back. Since the breakup he has cut off all contact with me and I don’t know if that’s because he did something with someone else while he was gone and he feels guilty or if he found someone else. He deleted his Facebook or at least blocked me and I am so upset. He seems mad at me. I still think about him daily and all the fun times we had together. Do you think this article will help in my situation? I don’t know what to do. I miss him so much and want him back so bad. I’ve always heard that giving them their space is the best way to go about getting them back but that doesn’t seem to be working. HELP!
St. Jude I ask that you find it in your heart to pray for me and my boyfriends relationship. I ask that you take away any temptation my boyfriend may have or remove any other individual that will come between our relationship. Help him to be aware of how much I care and love him. I ask that you help our relationship be strong, loving, honest, and respectful. In the name of the father the son and the holy spirit. AMEN

Occasional conflict is a part of life, according to New York-based psychologist Susan Silverman. But if you and your partner feel like you're starring in your own nightmare version of the movie Groundhog Day -- i.e. the same lousy situations keep repeating day after day -- it's time to break free of this toxic routine. When you make the effort, you can lessen the anger and take a calm look at underlying issues.
Seriously though, if you see any book, product or article that guarantees that it can get you your ex back 100% of the time you should stop and realize that you are probably about to look at something that was made up just to get you to buy it or read it. Ironically, a lot of the stuff out there that makes these ridiculous claims offer no value and leave you feeling taken advantage of.

I have known very rocky relationships that have sorted themselves out over time and then lasted, as far as I could tell, forever. Sometimes, these new beginnings started in the judge’s chambers when the divorce was being finalized. Sometimes afterwards. I have recently come across someone who married the same woman three times—although it is hard to believe that they have, at last, come to terms with each other. In these instances, it is often the case that the couple had not ever really made clear to each other just how strongly they felt about certain things. (They would say at this point that they told the other person a hundred times just what they felt; but I have been witness to some of these conversations, and sometimes I am left not quite understanding how strong their feelings were.)
Honestly, it is hard to think of any disadvantages when using text messages. Texting is the communication highway for today’s couples. You and your boyfriend probably texted each other all the time and rarely shared them with anyone. Basically texting is super intimate. You can share cute pictures and do all sorts of really fun things. Not to mention it is impossible to raise your voice over a text message. However, I would say the biggest advantage to text messaging would be the fact that you can take your time and think everything through. This is something that calling on the phone won’t allow you.
Talk to his friends. If you have mutual friends or if his friends would be willing to talk to you without telling your ex about it, consider asking them what they think the chances are that your ex would want to get back together with you. They are more likely than you to know if he has a new girlfriend or if he's dying to get back together with you.[5]
My ex girlfriend dumped me last night. She said that I treated her better than anyone ever had before, and when I asked why she was breaking up with me she said it was because I treated her more like a friend then a girlfriend. I was okay with it and trying to start to move on but then she texted me and said “I hope that this break up wont be a permanent thing and that I hope someday soon we can get back together”I have no clue what to do but I would like to get back togethersince she was the only girl I actually readily liked when i came across Dr kate she help me cast a return spell and my girl came back the third day thank you Dr kate you can also reach her email on (katelovespell@hotmail.com)
Okay so me & my ex boyfriend broke up like a couple months ago. Me and him have been dating for over a year. Ever since we got into high school he changed. He’s like every other guy now. During our relationship, he would cry when I left or if I took the bracelet he gave me off. I just really want him back, I still do love him. I honestly need to know what to do. Help me please
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