Commit to having a better relationship. If your ex-boyfriend takes you back, you both need to take steps to make sure that the same problems that caused your last breakup will not interfere with your relationship again. Talk to each other about what kinds of conflicts you have had in the past and how you could deal with them more appropriately going forward.[9]
About a month ago I found out my boyfriend of 4 months has been cheating on me. I was so confused, we have been doing so well and we were really close, I didn’t understand what made him do it. Before we started dating, we were close friends for 3 years, we told each other everything and we used to tell people that we were going to get married some day, at the time it was all a joke, I had no intention of being more then friends but he did. Anyways we got together and it was the best couple of months of my life. Then, I found out he cheated on me, he begged me for forgiveness and he said he didn’t really have a reason, he was just stupid! So we got back together 3 days after I found out. The first week we were okay, but the second week turned to chaos, I started feeling insecure, every girl that called him, texted him or took a picture with him made me cringed, I will throw tantrums and break up with him, then call him back and all he would just say is “did you get over your little tantrums?” We stopped having real conversations, it seem like he would always cut our phone calls short and tell me I talk too much, so I started picking fights with him because that’s the only way I can get his attention if we’re not having seX. all he did was apologized but he never really made the effort of making it up to me, I didn’t make him fight for me, he stop spending time with and stop calling as often as he used to. HE cheated and when I forgave him it’s like I shot myself in the foot, because he completely changed, and I have been trying to show him that I have forgiven him by sending him cute messages in the middle of the night that he can read in the morning (he’s never done anything like this, his never even called me beautiful or complimented my new hairstyles or any effort i make for him) and we can move forward but he started acting as if I cheated or I have done something wrong, so I retaliated by constantly reminding him that he cheated. Anyways his been paying me no attention, unless we’re talking about sex, he doesn’t listen to anything else I have to say. So I decided to dump him on text after I called him to confine in him and he just completely disregarded my feelings and told me his going back to sleep. I text him and told him that it’s over and that I was not over him cheating on him. it’s been in days and he has not replied, probably because i also told him i was over him and hated him(lies), he wouId already called back by now to stop me from leaving but he hasn’t. I was only breaking up with as cry for attention and affection. Though we fought so much leading to the break up, we were always great and he made me so happy in a way no other man has ever before. I feel bad because I Forgave him for cheating then dumped him After I told him he was forguven. He probably thinks I’m just crazy. What do I do? Even though I initiated the break up, I don’t want to be the one that crawls back because I will be condoning the way he’s been treating me lately, I don’t want to feel neglected again but I want him to want back so badly that he would do anything to make it work and lasts
My ex loved me like crazy and i didnt quite value it. I broke up with him 6 months back. And then i realized i loved him, so i became clingy and irritating and moody, things got worse and it was the first time that he told me that he didnt want to get back. We were best friends from 3 years, and we dated for 8 months. Now he has come back, he just wants to be friends, though he is not dating anyone. I am so in love with him!! He says he loves me when he is drunk but something else when he is sober. He is giving me so many mixed signals that it hurts. I have no idea what to do.

honestly I did not show appreciation to my ex while we together. I missed valentines day and his birthday. when I decided to make the best of times with him it was to late. then I asked him for closure and he came talked in person. I told what if I got therapy because there is something going on that effects my relationships. he told its been three weeks and I’m over you….. I cried of course then looked at him and said I feel better. just got sick of being sad, doesn’t mean I’m over him. but its step. then I told me what was really going on and told he’s proud of me said I’m strong person and good girl. he told me to feel free to talk to him and said he wont be jerk to me. he also wants to improve. it sucks that I was to occupied with other stuff in life that i didn’t learn to understand him but oh well. that doesn’t mean has feelings for me. sadly I cant live in world that revolves around him I must create my own world and keeping living up to my goals. this relationship may have been painful but helped realize what I need. we are blind from pain because only look at the bad qualities that it brings us but we all need realize its actually beautiful because it shapes us. I’m going to embrace it this break up..


When I was a medical student I was walking along Third Ave one evening and stopped to argue with a friend of mine, at the same time leaning against a doorway, which suddenly swung in precipitating me down a couple of steps into a weird hallway. Odd decorations were hanging all along the wall, evidently for sale. I only remember a used toilet seat which had a price on it of thirty dollars, quite a lot of money back then. Anyway, this place turned out to be some sort of shop, although there was no sign anywhere. The proprietor was a fat, unkempt woman who had a cigarette dangling from her mouth. She took one look at me and said that what I needed was a "love potion." I needed something, I knew, so I ordered the love potion, which was not as expensive as the toilet seat-- but cost too much, I told her. She got mad and muttering took the potion back.
Me and boyfriend have been together for 4 years and we broke up for 4 months last year because I said I would change about my moodiness and I didnt, I didn’t put as much work in as I should of then I got back together with him in June. We have been fine no arguments nothing, until December when I was feeling down and stressed with uni and I was ill with severe iron deficiency but no doctors would listen to me so I have been really stressed and upset and continued to January and I didn’t realise how it was making him feel. Recently we had an argument because I was so low and upset with everything as it was all going wrong I just wanted to know he was there, so was a little needy. I upset him by saying he didn’t care but apologised by getting him a card as I was truly sorry and didn’t mean to hurt him. He has now broke up with me after I said I will change and be myself now I have been treated and we can have fun, I have taken this more serious wrote down my thoughts, his thoughts and how I can change for the better and I am certain I am going to change and want to change. I have asked him for one more chance and he says he doesn’t believe I will change. Do you think there is time and he will regret his decision, I love him so much and I can see a future with him
Please lord I ask that you allow Bryan and I to get through this difficult time. I pray that the anxiety he deals with lessens so that we may be given a chance to truly work on our relationship. We are blessed to have one another but as he steps back for a break, all I can do is hope that your guidance will give us the strength to heal and to see that our love should be embraced, cherished and honored instead of change into such sadness that will leave a permanent, indelible mark on our hearts.

For that reason you should look to keep your texts fun, light and positive. Leave the heavy stuff (mentions of the breakup and getting back together) for later on. You shouldn’t be mentioning those things in your texts because BEFORE those topics can be mentioned, you first need time to change how she feels about you. Only once her feelings about you are more positive, will you then be able to see good results from discussing the breakup and the potential of getting back together. Why?

Again, this is risky since there is a higher chance of him saying no. However, if you two were really making a lot of progress via texting and you really think he is feeling the same way you are about your current relationship then the “I was in the neighborhood method” may do the trick for you. The obvious advantage is that you get an instant date/meet up!
Shelly I was reading some comments and yours had a bit on me !! It’s been a while since I’ve been searching for “how to make my ex come back to me “, and I think a lot of these articles helped a little after our first breakup. However, if you want to make this person become madly be in love with you, then I can recommend you to someone who helped me. I had a result in 2 weeks.

I tried everything imaginable to recover my relationship with my ex. He has a substance problem which I was unaware of for a long time. When I finally discovered it I was naive enough to think his promises of trying to quit would work. The worst part was his interfering guy “friends” who did not want me to break up the party. He is middle aged and so am I. I tried to be tolerant as we had many great times and we compatible in many ways. I do believe this man loved me and I thought we might get married (neither of us had ever been married).
hi I”m someone s ex girlfriend . yes I don”t understand why my ex walked out on me. without even saying bye bye. and why did go and cheat with my friend for why. my ex girlfriend didn’t have to do me like the way she did me. because if she did”t want me than she shoulder told me than. but I love her and I still care about her a lot . and yes I still wanna get back with her . because overtime I think of her I cry . because I misses her . wild I didn’t no that I”m boring . well why she didn’t tell me than. why sweet heart . but nope I don’t have a girlfriend no. sense my ex walked out on me . from tabitha
If you want to save your failing relationship then open these three things: your eyes, your ears, and your heart.  Active listening involves all three. Eyes have to do with giving your mate your full attention. Look them in the eyes in a conversation. Listen without interrupting. Avoid using terms like, “Yes, but…”  Listening with your heart is showing empathy to your partner.  It communicates that you care.

st. jude i pray that i want a better relationship with my boyfriend rudy open his heart and his eyes and let him see that i really do love him, care for him keep him away from his ex yvette that she doesn’t come between our relationship let him realize that am the woman of his dreams n that i will make him happy n love him forever help him be abetter man for me and my daughter , san jude i really love him please help me change him into a good person and that he just have eyes for me …..amen in the one of the father and son and hoy spirt amen
I am asking for prayers. As I am going through a rough time, and am doing everything I can to save my relationship, I pray. Lord, I pray and ask you to hear me. I pray that you give me the strength to overcome this trial you have placed in front of me, so I can move forward. I lift up my relationship to you and pray for healing. I pray that the love that I know still remains can be rekindled, and that you restore the connection that was once had. I pray that you remind him of all of the great times you blessed us with, and all of the tribulations we have overcome together. I pray that he knows how much I truly love and cherish him. I pray that you remove any temptation that may be hindering the love we have between us. I pray that you restore the strength within the two of us as one. Lord, I’m asking you to hear my prayers and I thank you for blessing me with this love. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
It's important to not just talk, but to listen and hear what your partner has to say about what's going on in your relationship.[5] You can show you're listening by summarizing what your partner has to say to show you've understood what he or she has said. You can also ask questions that show you've heard what the person has said and that you want to know more.
Thanks for this post, Jason. After I read it I had a little hope that me and my ex-boyfriend COULD get back together. But then I scrolled down to the comments and I read everyone else’s comments, apprehensions, fears, emotional and psychological hardships that they’re going through and I wondered — if this is how a person is making us feel, is it worth it?

God please help me, i am asking you to please help me save my relationship.my best friend and i had a fallout and are not on good terms. I truly want this relationship to work out. I love spending time with him and we have so much fun together. Things were going so well n then we had a fight today. God please help me help him see that im a good girl and that wr can be happy together. God please i need him in my life. Please help him to see me for the good and forgive me for our past issues. I am so heart broken right now. Gos please save us. Please give me the opportunity to talk this out with him and make everything okay. Please god. Dont let him give up on me
hi I”m someone s ex girlfriend . yes I don”t understand why my ex walked out on me. without even saying bye bye. and why did go and cheat with my friend for why. my ex girlfriend didn’t have to do me like the way she did me. because if she did”t want me than she shoulder told me than. but I love her and I still care about her a lot . and yes I still wanna get back with her . because overtime I think of her I cry . because I misses her . wild I didn’t no that I”m boring . well why she didn’t tell me than. why sweet heart . but nope I don’t have a girlfriend no. sense my ex walked out on me . from tabitha
When things are rocky, having sex or performing acts that pleasure your partner are not always in the cards. But even if you're not in the mood at the moment, there's hope if you actually still want to connect intimately, according to Rachel Russo. She says wanting to have sex even when you are struggling with a relationship, shows that you are deeply bonded to your partner. "If it feels unnatural to withhold sex even when things are rocky, it can indicate that you are thinking about what is best for the relationship in the long term," says Russo. "If you don't want to deprive your marriage of the intimate connection, it is a sign that you really care about each other and want to make the marriage work."
I ask today that you strengthen the relationship between my boyfriend and I. I ask that you give him peace of heart and mind that he can trust me completely and to remove his insecurity and doubt. May he see how much I love, appreciate and accept him. I ask for your guidance and strength and for our love for one another to continue to grow from strength to strength.

This article sounds good i want my ex to come back to me, only becouse we had a great relationship and i never wanted him to leave. It was he who said that it was nfot going to work anymore just becouse she started a new job and didn’t have the time and let’s be honest he was lazy and didn’t wanted to commit at the end… Anyway i know he is the one for me all is needed is for him to make the decition and take responsibility. Does that sounds like i am desparate and do you think we should be thogether if i have done all for us and he saw a little obsticle on the way and decided he can’t do it.?…..
My ex had consistently chased me for 6 years throughout the whole of school and after, we were always really close friends and i was always too afraid to progress further incase that friendship got ruined. Even in his one other long term relationship he admitted to still always wanting to be with me and even throughout the good times with his ex he still imagined doing those things with me instead. Then after going through a hard time with a previous ex myself and having him support me we began to get close again and eventually ended up starting a relationship. And while at first i was slightly unsure about it, it quickly became clear it was the best decision i’d ever made, he was so madly in love with me and for the first time i felt so confident that someone felt like the luckiest person alive to be with me. He absolutely adored me and treated me like a queen. 2 and a half years later, and only just coming back off a wonderful week long holiday together with his family.. out of the blue, it’s over. Seeming in a bit of a bad mood one day i asked him if he was okay or if i’d done something and got the ‘we need to talk’ text. My stomach immediately dropped and i felt sick, but didn’t want to jump to conclusions and assume the worst. He came over that evening and told me he thought things had changed and that for weeks he’d had this feeling of that ‘sometimes’ he just wants to be my friend. Sometimes?! Even though that morning he’d commented on how it was our anniversary and 2 days previously we had even been on a date night where he’d complained because i had red lipstick on meaning he couldn’t kiss me and asked me to sit next to him in the bar instead of opposite him so he could put his arm around me, not really ‘i just want to be your friend behaviour’ right?
Understand the breakup. What did each of you do to contribute to the breakup? Most relationship troubles do not crop up unexpectedly, but build up over time. The odds are good that it wasn't a one-sided problem and that there were signs that it was coming. Take some time and do some soul searching before you attempt to get your ex back. You want to make sure you are not wasting your time or energy on something futile.
Dear heavenly father, as I come to you today to ask for guidance and strength to strengthen my relationship Lord I can’t do this alone. I Need Your Loving Arms to keep us focused on you through this difficult time lord. We both have extremely busy schedules so it’s hard for us to see each other Lord and during those busy times we tend to argue more when we deeply love each other Lord come into our lives show us what we need to do to continue going the way that you want us to go, Lord. In Jesus name Amen.

About a month ago I found out my boyfriend of 4 months has been cheating on me. I was so confused, we have been doing so well and we were really close, I didn’t understand what made him do it. Before we started dating, we were close friends for 3 years, we told each other everything and we used to tell people that we were going to get married some day, at the time it was all a joke, I had no intention of being more then friends but he did. Anyways we got together and it was the best couple of months of my life. Then, I found out he cheated on me, he begged me for forgiveness and he said he didn’t really have a reason, he was just stupid! So we got back together 3 days after I found out. The first week we were okay, but the second week turned to chaos, I started feeling insecure, every girl that called him, texted him or took a picture with him made me cringed, I will throw tantrums and break up with him, then call him back and all he would just say is “did you get over your little tantrums?” We stopped having real conversations, it seem like he would always cut our phone calls short and tell me I talk too much, so I started picking fights with him because that’s the only way I can get his attention if we’re not having seX. all he did was apologized but he never really made the effort of making it up to me, I didn’t make him fight for me, he stop spending time with and stop calling as often as he used to. HE cheated and when I forgave him it’s like I shot myself in the foot, because he completely changed, and I have been trying to show him that I have forgiven him by sending him cute messages in the middle of the night that he can read in the morning (he’s never done anything like this, his never even called me beautiful or complimented my new hairstyles or any effort i make for him) and we can move forward but he started acting as if I cheated or I have done something wrong, so I retaliated by constantly reminding him that he cheated. Anyways his been paying me no attention, unless we’re talking about sex, he doesn’t listen to anything else I have to say. So I decided to dump him on text after I called him to confine in him and he just completely disregarded my feelings and told me his going back to sleep. I text him and told him that it’s over and that I was not over him cheating on him. it’s been in days and he has not replied, probably because i also told him i was over him and hated him(lies), he wouId already called back by now to stop me from leaving but he hasn’t. I was only breaking up with as cry for attention and affection. Though we fought so much leading to the break up, we were always great and he made me so happy in a way no other man has ever before. I feel bad because I Forgave him for cheating then dumped him After I told him he was forguven. He probably thinks I’m just crazy. What do I do? Even though I initiated the break up, I don’t want to be the one that crawls back because I will be condoning the way he’s been treating me lately, I don’t want to feel neglected again but I want him to want back so badly that he would do anything to make it work and lasts
I discovered I was pregnant I wanted to keep the baby but he wanted me to have an abortion. After too much pressure from him I gave in and aborted. He’s gone MIA ever since, he won’t respond to texts and only answers my calls after like the fourth ring I apologized this morning for being too demanding about the abortion money he said that he would think about it and that he would organize on how I’d get my stuff from his place. I really love him and I don’t know what to do or where to begin without him. Can the no contact rule to work in this case? Do I have any chances?
Yes, she’s back! I thought it was impossible. She seemed to hate me! I annoyed her a lot. She stopped calling me and didn’t answer my calls, screamed that I just need to leave her alone and nothing was possible for us. But as soon as I started following the rules described in your book, she called me! It took just two weeks! We met again and now everything is fine! I was sure I could never get her back, but your book helped me understand many of my mistakes. Thank you!
So my situation is a bit complicated. I was in this relationship for 3 years and 7 months. I broke up with him 8 months ago because I just couldn’t do it anymore. We were both hurting each other. After the break up we were always contacting each other. We tried to get back together multiple times, we talked about our new relationships and he seems to love the new girl. I spent a week at his house and I got pregnant. Now I’m four months pregnant and he knows because I told him. It’s now been about 9 months since the break up and I’m trying to get back with him. Lately we talk alot mostly about the baby and me trying to get him back. But he has no trust in me and says he can’t trust me ever again. What do you think?

Spend time with good friends. One of the best ways to source yourself is to put yourself in the company of good friends. Good friends remind you of who you really are. They can give you a new perspective on things and can generally be fun to be around. Good friends serve as one of the best distractions as opposed to eating a bucket of ice cream and watching Netflix all alone because they can help to build you up in the meantime and leave you more empowered, stronger, and more in touch with who you are. It might be worth it to define who good friends are.Good friends are friends that help you choose the most useful and empowering interpretation of your situation. They don’t look to blame or help you wallow in self-pity. They have compassion for you, yet believe that you are inherently fine. They remind you of how fun you are and how much life itself has to offer. Spending time with people like this will feed your soul. During this time take advantage of everything these wonderful people in your life have to offer. Plan a trip. See that show you all always wanted to see. Do all the things that make you feel alive and do it in good company.


Another year goes by. It was summer and I was having the time of my life. I decided to take a break from dating and focus on myself. Then I ran into him in Central Park on a Saturday afternoon. At last, he was single and I was single, we were both living in NYC, now was the time. But he didn’t contact me after that. So I decided to contact him. I sent him a friendly message on Facebook and opened the door wide for him to ask me out… but he didn’t take my expertly laid out bait.
You need to become the person that they fell in love with in the first place. No, scratch that, you need to be a person better than the person they fell in love with. You need to show them that you are not the miserable, needy loser who was begging when they broke up with you. There is a good chance that they have associated a lot of negative feelings with you. You have to break the pattern and give them a taste of the new you.

Your story is very similar to mine. He was dating another girl but i didnt know it. He came back to me several times but didnt want to work things out so i blocked him from social media. that was three months ago. He has been dating that girl for several months even when when he was trying to convince me that he still loved me and missed me but because of my shortcomings he couldnt be with me. Now they are a couple and he hasnt tried to reach out. i changed my number though.
Dear God, Jesus, Mary, Joseph, grandma, grandpa, all the Angels and Saints and Archangels and anyone else I may have missed. Please help me with my relationship. We’ve been together a little over a year and both have young autistic children who are not getting along. We are trying to blend a family and keep moving forward in the right direction but lately have been stressed and fighting. My boyfriend is having a hard time and he’s closing up and giving up on us. Please pray for me and for the five of us. Please pray for my boyfriend. Help him have an open heart and mind and realize that we need each other and will overcome this. Please pray for him and anything he is going through that I do not know about. Please pray for our two little girls as well as the oldest. Please help them get along. Please help me and my jealous ways and help me to fight off all of my insecurities. Please pray for us tonight and everyday and to ward off anyone’s negative thoughts. Please in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
I was with my ex for 9 years off and on. We broke up a lot. I was immature. Shes older. She told me I was her soul mate. I felt the same but couldnt show it. I would text her amazing words but when she would see me I couldnt back thenlm up or say them in person. I was depressed and lacked confidence. She finally had enough and told me she was done and I should move on. She has blocked me to and called me a stalker once or twice. Ive never even drove by her house or wrote her a letter. We were together 9 years! How can she call me a stalker? Because I love her and am trying to show her? Well, I realized in the last 3 months that I didnt appreciate her when I had the chance and I hurt her. I never gave her time or space enough to heal and so she took it. Now I dont think she has forgiven me for not giving her that space. I dont know. Fact is bro that women are capable of pure evil when they are hurt by the man they truly loved. When they stop talking all together its because they killed that amazing love they once cherished.
×