Lee Baucom’s Save the Marriage package of materials is a good starting point, as is John Gottman’s book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Baucom does a great job in showing you how to get a different perspective on all aspects of your marriage (and even on perspectives themselves). Gottman describes the dynamic happily married couples have that keep the negative feelings they have for one another from overwhelming their positive feelings. The book includes short tests and exercises designed to help you understand that dynamic, and to get it for your marriage.
So he moved out of my flat but he left the majority of his stuff here at my apartment. I went on a trip and I asked him to take his stuff from my place for good, he had 7 days for that. When I arrived home, nothing happened, his stuff were still here. During my holiday I didn’t contact him, when he messaged me, I didn’t respond him. When I was traveling home he messaged me like “we need to talk.” I didn’t know what could happened, so I replied with a simple “about what?” when he told me he didn’t have the emotional strength to take his stuff and he also was worried about me that if something terrible happened to me or what? So I replied to his messages focusing on the context like “I’m gonna pack your stuff alone” and then he asked me if I need help with it, I answered him with a simple “no”. So did I violated the “no contact rule” here? Can we consider all this as “emergency”? and also do you think I made “one of the biggest mistakes” by being too cold or rude? Please help me, I don’t want to drive him away, I don’t know what to do. :(
My boyfriend of seven months broke up with me two days ago. We were really good together, we had a great complicity, friendship, we were always there for each other and like best friends. What went wrong is that I have important anxiety issues and i’ve let them get the best of me and take over our relationship. I have a lot of fears, of abandonment and such. We were constantly fighting because of this, and I believe he did his best to be patient and there for me. My anxieties were mostly caused by the fact that it took him a long time to be ready for a relationship in the beggining, plus he wasnt totally over his ex. He eventually got there but I never completely calmed down about this, until it was already too late.
After the breakup I did the whole crazy ex girlfriend thing then just stopped talking to him completely for 3months. We started talking again when we both turned up at our club unexpectantly and I apologised and asked him to hang out. But, I didnt feel like he was hearing me so I full on lost it a few times. And now we are back to not talking for a month now but we still see each other around at our club. I’d also made the mistake of telling him that I wanted to start the relationship from scratch and he baulked at that.

Need some advice here, my ex girlfriend/ girlfriend just broke it off after a night at the bar. The night started out with a romantic dinner and then we met her friends out at the bar.. We both had a great night until after bar close when we were trying to decide on what we were going to all do the rest of the night.. We ended up getting in an argument about something, to be honest I don’t remember, and she just told me to go home. She proceeded to walk away with her and a few of her guy friends so naturally I got upset. I contemplated on what to do and them decided to walk to her place.. That was obviously not a good decision, when I got there I got upset and accused her of not wanting to be with me and she went on to say that I followed her he and was stalking her which was not my intent at all.. After going back and forth I just flat out asked if we were over and if she even wanted to be with me and she responded no I don’t want to be. I then immediately started to try and plead with her and ask her why and kept trying to get her to talk to me about it and all she did was tell me to leave and go home, which I did after waiting for a cab for an hour.. On the way home in the cab I was so damn upset and sent her a text message that she didn’t care about me and that I was easily replaced by by one of her guy friends that was at her place with everyone.. She responded with what r u talking about and I then responded with I know your sleeping with him I could tell how lit up your face was when you looked at him and then told her one more time that she was going to sleep with him.. She responded back by saying she wasn’t and that I’m crazy. About a half hour goes by and she text me back that she misses me and said that she was getting a cab to come over.. So she came over and apologized for being a brat and apologized for the night.. I then asked her why she got so mad and she said she didn’t remember.. So I let it be figured we would talk in the morning about it, so we had sex and went to bed. The next morning comes and I try to talk to her and she said she didn’t want to talk about it so I did what I shouldn’t have and prayed at her a little bit to get her to talk and she flipped out and said I just want to go home so asked her again do you even want to be with me and she said I don’t know. I brought her home and when I dropped her off I asked if I could have a kiss and we kissed and she said ill talk to you later.. She finally got back to me 14 hrs later and said that she didn’t feel good and had been sleeping all day which I guess I can understand after a full night of drinking.. I did send her a text and left her a voicemail saying how torn up and confused I am about everything but didn’t say it in a demanding way at all.. The next day I sent her another message in the afternoon asking her if she would have time to talk in person and she said yea.. Being absolutely heartbroken at this point I decided to make her a huge bouquet of flower along with a handwritten card apologizing for everything that happened.. I brought them over to her place and she was still sleeping saying she didn’t feel good so I just dropped th off and we agreed to talk tomarow about things.. I’m just so confused right now, I know we have only been seeing each other for 2 months but I don’t understand how things coul end like they did I have been in this 100%and treat her like an absolute queen.. What should I so here I don’t want to loose this girl she is absolutely one of a kind and I genuinely care for her
Me and boyfriend have been together for 4 years and we broke up for 4 months last year because I said I would change about my moodiness and I didnt, I didn’t put as much work in as I should of then I got back together with him in June. We have been fine no arguments nothing, until December when I was feeling down and stressed with uni and I was ill with severe iron deficiency but no doctors would listen to me so I have been really stressed and upset and continued to January and I didn’t realise how it was making him feel. Recently we had an argument because I was so low and upset with everything as it was all going wrong I just wanted to know he was there, so was a little needy. I upset him by saying he didn’t care but apologised by getting him a card as I was truly sorry and didn’t mean to hurt him. He has now broke up with me after I said I will change and be myself now I have been treated and we can have fun, I have taken this more serious wrote down my thoughts, his thoughts and how I can change for the better and I am certain I am going to change and want to change. I have asked him for one more chance and he says he doesn’t believe I will change. Do you think there is time and he will regret his decision, I love him so much and I can see a future with him
After being in relationship with my husband for nine years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email is doctorogul@gmail.com you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything.

I dated a amazing guy for two years and we broke up 7 years ago. I quickly married the wrong person and have filed for divorce. For years I felt like I owed my ex an apology but I was never in the position to do so (my husband was the insane jealous type), so a month ago I finally worked up the courage to call. It was amazing! We talked for hours and dissected how our relationship was doomed to fail based on our attitudes, and how young and inexperienced we were. Every shitty thing that was done is now a joke that we can laugh at, and we began texting/calling regularly for two weeks. He is on a indefinite break from a long-term girlfriend and I am in the process of divorce, and it seemed like we both just needed to be able to talk to each other and be totally candid about our past and present.
my boyfriend nd I were deeply in love till I met some girls who liked to go out…smoke nd drink a lot ..I spent most of my time with them than my boyfriend…everything changed after that until I met one guy from the party then dated him..I loved him so much because he was good !!..but he didn’t love me because we broke up nd I now regret why I chose him over my previous boyfriend…I want my boyfriend back..what can I do now
I talked with lots of my friends and dating gurus before locating Michael Fiore regarding how to get an ex girlfriend back. “Come on… She was NOT for you.” said by one of my closest friend. Many friends suggested me to MOVE ON. At 29, I have no intentions to dating someone new because I knew I have deepest connection with my girlfriend that I can’t build with any new girl.
This is the power of jealousy. Now, I am NOT recommending that you go out and date someone new. I am recommending that you drop certain hints in your communication with your ex boyfriend that you are out meeting new people. The key to this is that YOU CAN’T BE OBVIOUS. Do you think you will get very far if you rub the fact that you are out and about with other guys? The answer is no. There is a subtle art to incorporating jealousy texts into your conversations and I am going to teach you that art.
It may be sound terrible to you but there is no way to say it in soft words so I can say it loud to you. You have to end your contact with your ex boyfriend for full 21 days. There is no exception to this rule. It doesn’t matter how much you are missing him right now you have to end contacting your ex boyfriend if you want him to get back in your life. This rule is based on strong psychological mechanism and it is proven to work.
My ex bf and I live together. He said he will never change his mind. He says he is moving out. I have no proof. He hasn’t told his family we are broken up, for over a month now. He got on tinder immediately and is now off tinder. He is posting videos from a vacation of our from almost a year ago. I am living my life and going out trying to be social. How can I get him back?

Me and my girl have two kids together she left me because I was too controlling. She left me 3 months ago. She lives with a friend that’s a girl about 100 miles away from me.Before she left I accused her of cheating a lot she was tired of it and left. For two months I bothered her trying to get her back. I’m her first love and her first boyfriend. When we last spoke she said she hates me and wished I was dead. If she didn’t care about me than why is she still responding when I talk to her? I know she still loves me and she knows I still love her. Everytime I’m positive with her she knocks me down yelling, cussing, or threatening to take my kids away forever. She thinks if we get back together I will an ass again. She cries sometimes when we talk over the phone. Do I have a chance of getting her back? And How? We been together for 6 years


I came across a website that suggested that Lord Spiritual can help fix broken marriages and get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!!that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before, All thanks to Lord Spiritual. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Lord Spiritual is a real and powerful spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your ex back or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster now.
Now, if by happenstance you run into him, that’s a different story. It would be a good idea to be cheerful, positive, and in a good mood when you see him.  Don’t get pulled into any conversations about the relationship or any debates about what went wrong, whose fault it was, or anything like that. And don’t be pouty or outright mean. That’s just immature.
Relationship experts don’t always talk about how to keep your girlfriend happy after she has returned. When you read this book you will learn that it’s not that difficult to get your girlfriend back, it is much more difficult to deal with her mood swings and whims. How do you entice sexual desire in her every day? How do you get the girlfriend of your dreams? How do you anticipate her lies? None of this is easy and most “experts” don’t include such techniques into their books.

He said that he didn’t think that we had enoughin common, which isn’t true because we would do so many old and new things together. When we broke up he said that he felt like we stopped being friends but then later saud the he was still my friend because we were really good friends. He also still wanted to hug and touch me and told me that he still wanted to do those things. None ofthis made any sense to me.
My boyfriend and I broke up 4 days ago.i left him bc he wasnt appreciating me enough and then the next day i decided i wanted to be back together and just try and work through things as a couple.he has been ignoring all of my phone and won’t speak to me at all.we work together so things are ten times harder I just want him back we have been through so much and I just can’t picture my life without him. he has told me this is it but we have done this so many times its almost a weekly thing. This time i went way to far though after being rejected by him the last time I lied to him by telling him he was a terrible boyfriend and even worse in bed(complete lied ,he rocked my world) I just wanted to hit below the belt and make him feel how I was feeling.I also lied and told him i had been cheating on him this whole time. Sounds crazy i know I just lost it. I really hopes this works bc i don’t want to loose the love of my life,my bestfriend,my soulmate all bc I lost it .any words of advice?

After a year and few months, my ex left me cold turkey. I’ve been told that it was immature or just selfish the way she just stopped..talking. She was 25 and I was her 2nd real boyfriend, she was a goodie stay at home girl. Well it’s been almost a year, and she’s still on my mind, i still wish we were together, maybe after I get my RN license, i can talk to her again. Sometimes I want to text her just to ask how she is or somehow to see that beautiful smile of hers again..It sucks that when I think of us, I think of all the good, fun, and happy times, and I never think of the bad times that happened between us, unless someone actually tells me to think about it, and think about how she made me stress and how she didn’t appreciate the things I would do for her. Sad thing is it feels like all she ever thinks about are the bad things and the faults during our relationship. I think this is where people that are in love differ…I can only see what makes her so special to me and why its so hard for me to remember the not so green side of the relationship. Maybe finding someone that sees only the good in me is what love truly is. Its 3am I’m incoherent, I’ll probably forget I ever wrote this..
Couples therapy can help you learn new skills. Love and relationship psychologist Dr. Sarah Schewitz says: "If you really want your relationship to work, but you're just not getting along, you should probably reach out for help and acknowledge that you don't have the skills to fix it. There's nothing wrong with needing help. That's what couples therapy is for, to help you learn the tools to have the relationship you both want."
I’m sorry Eileen, i keep bugging…but he thinks I’m playing mind games w him bc I messed up in the beginning and it was a complete misunderstanding… and said if I don’t get in touch with him that he will find someone else to keep himself from getting depressed. It’s funny bc ever since I been giving him space, he been trying to text and call me alot…this guy is very difficult since I used to push him away bc I felt like I was not good enough for him…I’m trying to b positive
Through marital or couple therapy, the counsellor can help the couple increase effective communication skills, assist in looking at each other’s perspective, discuss what makes a relationship work and what a healthy relationship looks like, help identify specific problems and dynamics of the relationship, understand gridlocked conflicts, and help establish interventions and strategies that will help strengthen conflict management skills.
She texts me saying she cant talk and to meet her at her locker at the end of the day to “Talk”. Im not stupid. I knew what was going to happen. And sure enough when i went to talk to her. She told me that she didnt want me to be dating a girl that wasnt gonna give me what i wanted… even though i clearly told her i didnt care. I tried explaining myself. Trying everything in my will to not lose something that was so perfect just 24 hours before this had happened. I want to tell her how i really feel seeing as this talk took less than a minute and im not taking it very well. Hard to concentrate in school and life just sucks without her in it. Im not fully reliant on her but it was such a good thing. til i asked her.
Make fully clear to your partner what kind of behavior you will or will not put up with — but don't do this in the middle of a fight or while drinking alcohol. If your partner acts in a way you won't put up with or makes a hurtful remark, point out that the comment or action was hurtful, and that you don't want them to repeat it. Keep the volume of your voice low, and use a kind tone. If, on the other hand, your partner tends to become aggressive or hurtful when drinking, then they have a serious problem, which needs to be addressed. You can help, but don't bring up your concerns while your significant other is drinking and being rude. Wait until they are sober and calm, and then express your concerns as calmly as possible.
Breakup is hard as it is, especially if you are still obsessing over your ex and wondering all the time whether or not they miss you. On top of that, if your ex starts dating someone else, it’s almost feels like someone punched you really hard in your stomach (while wearing a wolverine claw). Nothing can prepare you for this feeling. But it happens. And no, it’s nothing to worry about.
If you want someone back that has done that to you, you need to work on your boundaries and self esteem. I’ve totally been there and I know how you feel. I know it’s hard; you’re not alone. What’s done is done but now it’s time to have your own back, speak with your actions and take care of YOU. You deserve so much more and I know you know it 🙂 xoxoxo
I am blessed with the man I have by my side and I think like he is more than what I would have Imagined. Since the beginning, I have felt that it is a relationship brought by God. Lately, there has been a lot of overhinking on my side which has caused anxiety, fears and doubts. I cry thinking that i have to break up with him, and there is NO reason why. I pray that God turns this story around and keeps on blessing us on th epath that we are taking. We have been saving ourselves for marriage, and it has been two years with a lot of love. I pray that Saint Jude will intercede for us and remove all of my doubts and fears so I can enjoy the relationship we have and keep persuing God through it.

When things are rocky, having sex or performing acts that pleasure your partner are not always in the cards. But even if you're not in the mood at the moment, there's hope if you actually still want to connect intimately, according to Rachel Russo. She says wanting to have sex even when you are struggling with a relationship, shows that you are deeply bonded to your partner. "If it feels unnatural to withhold sex even when things are rocky, it can indicate that you are thinking about what is best for the relationship in the long term," says Russo. "If you don't want to deprive your marriage of the intimate connection, it is a sign that you really care about each other and want to make the marriage work."


Relationship experts don’t always talk about how to keep your girlfriend happy after she has returned. When you read this book you will learn that it’s not that difficult to get your girlfriend back, it is much more difficult to deal with her mood swings and whims. How do you entice sexual desire in her every day? How do you get the girlfriend of your dreams? How do you anticipate her lies? None of this is easy and most “experts” don’t include such techniques into their books.
I came across a website that suggested that Lord Spiritual can help fix broken marriages and get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!!that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before, All thanks to Lord Spiritual. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Lord Spiritual is a real and powerful spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your ex back or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster now.

He broke up with me last Monday after 1 year and 3 months, for me it was the happiest time of my life and we never fought and had a happy and loving relationship. Reading this has really helped me as I’m going into my second week of NC tomorrow. I genuinely think we both needed a break but I’m not going to sit here and believe that we’re gonna get back together I’m just going to do my 4 Week Detox, then go from there. Wish me luck . X
This advice goes against every single natural inclination you have and it’s hard. You’ll want to answer the points she’s making and show her why she’s wrong. You’ll want to get a second chance or promise to fix your mistakes. You’ll keep pushing your points and think that since she’s not answering you right away; you’re getting through to her. You’re not. You’re just making her uncomfortable. All you’re doing is making yourself appear needy. She’s not going to forget this behavior down the line when you try to win her back.
Holy spirt speak to Shirmal and get him on the right path away from temptation & urge of drak forces. Right now he is in your domain in Rome… Please I seek your blessing and guidense to retreat our relationship and love & care for one another. Keep us together thru thick & thin times. Let us not get distracted or deviate away from each other’s company..
Girls want to see self-improvement from guys. Maybe your girlfriend complained about something you did while you two were in your relationship. Maybe there's something that you know you can improve simply because it will make you a better person. Well, now's the time to strike. Cut your video game playing down to a reasonable time, if that's what she wants, or start wearing cleaner clothes when you're around her. If you focus on being a better person while apart, you can go back to her with the "evidence" that you're a new guy.
Hey guys i really need help. Me and our gf have gone through a breakup its not the first time this would be the third time. But i do not know if this one is serious. She said shes too young for a relationship she just wants to be single an live life. She does not want a bf. weve been together for 2 and a half years. I took her birginity and she took mine. But i dont want to lose her im desperate to have her back. I waited a couple of weeks then started speaking to her again. We caught up a couple of times just as friends. But even then she doesnt txt me unless i txt her. And when she replies its only short words. She actually got angry coz i went out with a few mates drinking and she asked if i hooked up with another girl. So that msg to me feels like she still cares for me but doesnt want a relationship. I snapped last night and txtd her and askes if she ever misses us. She said i dont think it can work anymore i just want to live life on my own. People are saying find someone new she was your first love. But the thing is i dont want to. We shared so many good times together. It was always me and her. She was me to a tea i couldnt see myself with anyone else but her. Shes the girl i want to spend the rest of my life with. I need this girl back so bad its not funny.
“He’s the Guy for me,” we need to end things on a good note, and I havent “Lost his Friendship”! WTF!!!! I had no words for him at that moment. I vowed I would’nt call him at ALL after that. Nine days passed & I txt him, “Hello Friend”. Only to never recieve a response. This led to me having a complete MELT DOWN on his VM. It was’nt a name calling blaming episode. It was more of the atleast talk to me if you ever really cared about us sort of thing. After that I went out for a few hours came home and decided I needed to forgive him and love him enough to let him go. SOOOOOO, I txt him before I went to sleep and told him just that I also told him that if found himself ever needing a real friend I would be here for him.. Now what I neeed to know is what if anything should I have done differently? Is there another element that I don’t know about like, some new Vagina dancing around my man???? Should I even care at this point? I really want my man back I LOVE him so much and his kids as well.. What is a women to do? What’s going on here??? PLease HELLLp.
I have been in relationship with my boyfriend for 2 year now and we were planning to get married soon and all of a sudden he left me for another girl, i really love this guy and never can imagine my life without him. I further tried all my best to get him back but all my effort to get him back in my life did not work out. It was on this faithful day, i came across some comments on a website about this great spell caster called Chief Dr Lucky, so many persons claimed that he help them to renew their relationship and bring their ex back, i had to contact him because he was my last hope. I contacted him through his email and he assured me that in two days time my boyfriend is going to leave the other girl and come back to me and it was a very great surprise to see my boyfriend coming back to me after two days. I am so very happy today that he came back to me and i achieved this with the help of Chief Dr Lucky, and i advice if you need his help too Email: Chiefdrlucky gmail com or Whats App: +2348132777335
Personally, I wouldn’t consider it an emergency if he’s without some of his stuff. However, if for whatever the reason he was so worried something happened to you, at some point he would ACTUALLY start looking for you, whether it’s at work or at home, in which you would find it sweet of course, but at the same time you can tell him you’re fine and just need some space.

Okay so my boyfriend broke up with me because I was transferring to another college while he was being forced to go back to Chicago. When we talked, he told me he was staying a bit longer but he still chooses to go to Chicago, despite that he didn’t really want to break up with me. How do I know if he really wants me back? I still love him, but I don’t want to chase him away.


I recently lost my girlfriend. I have to speak out on the theory of date em like u hate em. Couldn`t be further from the truth. If you know its casual, and its going to amount to much sure, i can see that. But if you both know your in love and this is it, Son you gotta respect it. My biggest flaw? I got in a comfort zone. I thought i was being the perfect boyfriend when indeed i wasn`t. I work long hours and a lot of times couldn`t find time for her because i was exhausted. Shit you need to make a girl feel as special as she really is. Never stop. Wake up everyday and make sure they know your thinking about them. Don`t make the same mistakes.

Spend time with good friends. One of the best ways to source yourself is to put yourself in the company of good friends. Good friends remind you of who you really are. They can give you a new perspective on things and can generally be fun to be around. Good friends serve as one of the best distractions as opposed to eating a bucket of ice cream and watching Netflix all alone because they can help to build you up in the meantime and leave you more empowered, stronger, and more in touch with who you are. It might be worth it to define who good friends are.Good friends are friends that help you choose the most useful and empowering interpretation of your situation. They don’t look to blame or help you wallow in self-pity. They have compassion for you, yet believe that you are inherently fine. They remind you of how fun you are and how much life itself has to offer. Spending time with people like this will feed your soul. During this time take advantage of everything these wonderful people in your life have to offer. Plan a trip. See that show you all always wanted to see. Do all the things that make you feel alive and do it in good company.
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