I understood so much more about where our feelings were coming from. I understood my wife much more and I felt more sympathy for her situation. I understood that I was driving her away with some of my actions and they were easy to correct. Bottom line: We are now much more patient and loving with each other. We are happier than we have ever been and our marriage is on track. Was it hard? Not really. It was more… like “ah-hah!” It took some effort, but honestly, with a bit of time and patience it was easier than I thought to turn things around.
You can’t just dive back into the relationship and expect everything to be different this time around. You broke up for a reason, probably several reasons, and those reasons will still be there unless properly dealt with. You can’t do the same thing and expect different results, that’s just insane (literally, I think that’s the actual definition of insanity).
We explained earlier how keeping your emotions in check is critical to making this period of no contact work. I know how easy it is to backslide and fall into our familiar patterns. This isn’t just the case with relationships either. Just think about how it normally goes for you when you’re starting anything new: a new low-carb diet, a new bedtime, mediation, a new workout routine, etc.
After couples of meetings on Facebook, I decided to visit his place as he was at my hometown (Vancouver, BC, Canada) at that time. In my one-to-one meeting I asked lots of question about how to get an ex girlfriend back and lot of other stuff on female psychology. One thing I really like in this personal meeting was, Michael instilled confident in me that none of my friends able to do.

I have known very rocky relationships that have sorted themselves out over time and then lasted, as far as I could tell, forever. Sometimes, these new beginnings started in the judge’s chambers when the divorce was being finalized. Sometimes afterwards. I have recently come across someone who married the same woman three times—although it is hard to believe that they have, at last, come to terms with each other. In these instances, it is often the case that the couple had not ever really made clear to each other just how strongly they felt about certain things. (They would say at this point that they told the other person a hundred times just what they felt; but I have been witness to some of these conversations, and sometimes I am left not quite understanding how strong their feelings were.)


Thanks so much for this. I broke up with my boyfriend and want him back. We just kept arguing i was jealous.. he said he only had eyes for me me and i was the love of his life. It has hurt him so much i know.. but im so willing to change.. i followed your tips i look great, have fun and he still looks at me like i am the one but says sex with no emotional strings is how he wants to do it for now as he is still hurting and probablyv thinks ill do it all again..but i won’t.I hope he comes back totally.. at the moment im working on trying to get him tovstart taking me to his local bar with him again.. we went all the time before. im taking itvslowly anyway. I never want to hurt him again


Then you cry, and maybe even look up to the sky, maybe even pray and think, ‘Please… Just let me get back with my ex. I hope my ex is just making a mistake and he/she wasn’t thinking it through. I know we are perfect for each other. I want to just call my ex up and say “I love you”.’ Then you look at your phone every half an hour, check your messenger, facebook, instagram, twitter, and heck… email inbox, to see if your ex would want to talk to you, all ready to get back together.

Very good article. My girlfriend broke up with me a couple of weeks ago, I said and did some bad things and she finally had enough and suddenly broke up, she just blocked me, that was her way of breaking up. So I panicked and texted her on the phone so many times until she texted me back and told me to stop contacting her and that she wanted nothing to do with me. I did absolutely everything wrong post break up, I was begging, being needy and looking depserate and she didn’t wanna listen or text me so I got angry by the end and wrote some bad things to her. I really regret it. I didn’t respect her. I only wanna get back with my ex but I feel like I really screwed up. Is there anything I can do to make her change her mind or make things better?
Well firstly, wherever you arrange to meet, make sure YOU arrive there about 10 minutes LATE. This way you’ll seem in no way desperate to have her back, or to impress her. Desperation and the desire to impress are traits that women associate with LOWER value men, therefore if you show them, they’d only turn her off. But if you can just show up a little late, that will prevent any desperation or desire to impress from coming across.

It feels like not being able to breathe when a good man leaves you. He’s put up with me for so many years, i’m so sorry for everything. i fked up i was naggy, unappreciative, rude, and not available to him emotionally i was pushing him away he was such a sweet heart and i always found something to argue with him about i took what we had for granted we took a break for a while and decided to try again start from the beginning..we went out had fun and i fell into my old way got mad and argued about soemthing so stupid.
My boyfriend just broke up with me yesterday and trying to start my NC but he doesn’t stop snapchatting me. He did say that he wants to be friends and keep in touch with me. He broke up with me because he has too much going on and need to focus on himself. (at least that’s what he said) I don’t know what to do…. and we were in long distance relationship.
You have the attraction back by this point already from the previous steps, so most of what you need to do now is just get out of your own way, and let the getting-back-together process happen on its own. In other words, you need to know what mistakes to AVOID, to prevent yourself from sabotaging the getting-back-together process, which is supposed to happen fairly naturally after the first 7 steps.
my bf and I were in love. we were happy and everything was perfect. then one day he asked me to sext him…I told him I was uncomfortable with doing that and I broke up with him. I kind of went into a depression. some days I felt suicidal. he started dating my “friend” but they don’t seem happy. they’ve been dating since October and they haven’t kissed or anything. I miss him so incredibly much and everyday I regret breaking up with him. he and I are still best friends, and I told him I still love him (even though he’s dating someone). all he said was “I don’t know what to say…” and I cry myself to sleep every night blaming myself for what happened. he’s a great guy and I need him back. I don’t cut myself or do anything like that, but I’m getting worse. I need help. does anyone have any advice?!
To save a relationship, you must allow her to feel as though you are doing it for the both of you because you want to take of the love that you and her have shared so far. It can’t be just about you getting her to want to be with you. It has to be about you guiding both yourself and her into deeper feelings of love, respect and attraction. Not just for your benefit, but for her benefit also.

Hi I need ur advice can u able to help me I want my bf back he don’t break up with me but have affair with other girl and say ones he break up with her than think for me when ever he marry just marry with me not her so y at present he talk with that girl y he is not with me and all his friends post on that girls time line and that girl send me pics off my bf with her I really need help pls if possibal replay me by mail I need help I want my bf back with me any how I will do it plz so me a track to get him back …


It was good, but the toxic feelings from the first breakup followed us wherever we went. Mary had let go of that fun-in-the-sun, summer-fling, freewheelin’ attitude I had desperately tried and failed to bring to our last relationship. She had made new friends and learned valuable lessons since our breakup, the biggest one being that guys who try to hold on to their high school ex-girlfriends are as dumb as they are stupid.
Oh my lord Jesus, you know everything, what is going inside me and what sufferings I have. Lord my prayers to you to save my relation with Him . My prayers to you to make him understand how much I care and asks for him, my prayers to you to make him feel everything what I am going through. My prayers to you to make him free from the anger which he possess . I surrender to you my lord . You are the only one who can help me . My faith in you is strong as my existence as pure as my thoughts. My givings to you my Lord. Help me Lord. Send him back in my life . Please , please , please 🙁 .. Help me Lord, help me.
What did i do? well… its pretty simple. I guess i figured we had been going out for a little bit so we were on the same comfort level. I was wrong. I asked her through text what she thought about sending nudes (naked pictures). I didnt force her or anything to send them. I had clearly offended her as she didnt take it lightly and got mad. She had told me that everything was alright after so i thought this would just pass. Til the next morning…
I’m confused… I was with my ex for 3 years n 6mthns n he cheated on me but when he was with her and he went to work he would call me n tell me he miss me n love me n want to b back with me. He’ll say things like I choose the wrng girl she’s controlling. Well 5 months go by without talkin n we was back together having sex , going out, having with each others family, but she jus kept texting him n calling him then she made up a lie saying she was pregnant by him n she really wasn’t but I feel like he still lover her because he reply back to her texts n calls her when I’m not around. Yesterday we out and he dropped me off at home and supposedly went home or to his dad’s but I called his house his roommate sayd he didn’t come home last night n I called his dad house n they said he didn’t come over, so I started to get worried n I called his cell phone n it keeps going to voicemail, but my mind is telling me he’s with her… I still love him but I’m tired of the heart ache n him lying to me every time he opens his mouth, we was talkin bout getting married next year. I need Advice pls help!!
Spending too much time with your girlfriend and not spending time with your friends and family is also one of the sign for clinginess that kills the attraction. Diamonds are rare that is why people pay thousands of dollars to buy them. Once people start getting diamonds from the every side of their home they will stop paying huge money for diamonds.
please save my relationship with my boyfriend of 13 years now we have a child. i need your prayer so strong some people are interfering in our relationship telling him that i’m not good enough for him and they were not there when we were struggling . now since these problems started he is not getting the write job, he borrows money every where he is not even aware he is messing up his life.i love him we all make mistakes but all of us deserve to be loved by the write people.i trust that God will help me cause i pray for him everyday he is a good person i know him.but these people are helping him destroy his life. he no longer visits his family,his mother had a stroke and he cant even support her. those people who say i’m wrong for him their lives are bad they want him marry someone who left him long ago go and get married because she is educated ,they even told the woman to give him a child he will be hers and she did. my problem is they are doing it for the write reasons they want the guy because they think he will marry her what about me i also want to get married she choose another man @least she got married.the girl new i was there she started by sending him massages telling him that she is sorry that has been going on for 6 years its only now that he responded so his distant family took him and told him that they r going to see a friend that’s when it started pray for our relationship in the name of the father,the son and the holly spirit amen.

I was this person for 4 years. When he meet me I had a daughter from a prevues relationship he accepted her as his own , which was good , but then we had a son together 2 years later. Any way when went through a lot of sh*t together he wet to jail and no one was their to help him in the time of need but me. I love this man with all my heart and soul . I know that he loves me because he told me so .i also have a mother who gets to involved in my relationship with him he is tired of it now . Plus I broke his trust my talking to male friends . I want him back but I don’t know how to got about it. I told him I wanted a family with him but he says no . I am heart broken now. I gave him space and we wind up having sex , afterwords I felt bad because I have feeling for him and I told him I wanted t be with him . Am lost and don’t know what to don’t.

If you feel your partner is pulling away, the way to go is not to try to gain (or regain) the power in your relationship. "Power" doesn't give you what you want. What you really want is to be loved, you want your love to be reciprocated, and you want praise, admiration, and respect. Your negative feelings about your relationship stem from a perceived lack of these features.
However, before we hit the ground running I feel it is important to mention a few things. The game plan outlined above is not set in stone. Every single relationship is unique and may require unique steps that I haven’t outlined. Knowing what to do can sometimes depend on your gut. So, if your gut is telling you that a particular tactic I have outlined won’t work for you I would definitely trust it. The main takeaway here is that you are going to have to get creative and sometimes even skip entire skips depending on how fast you are moving.
In the beginning when you first started dating your ex, things were probably wonderful. You established deep emotional bonds and everything felt amazing. You couldn’t wait to spend time together, and you got butterflies in your stomach every time you thought about her. It’s not that hard to get those feelings back. You can get your ex-girlfriend to remember the past fondly and want to get back to that time again. This time you can make things better and move forward in a healthy, positive relationship.

Me and my ex broke up about 4 months ago. I was truly deeply in love with him and he said he loved me too. We lost our virginity to each other. This past summer I went on a vacation to Hawaii and he went on a vacation to Wisconsin. He left two days before I got back. We had been going out for 7 and a half months and we stared having sex at the 3 month mark. The first time we saw each other after we both got back from our trips, we hung out and I was planning on having sex with him that night, he acted like everything was fine when I went to pick him up by making out with me, picking me up and spinning me around. We went out though and he sat me down and said we needed to talk. Right then i knew something was wrong. He broke up with me with the phrase “I’ve fallen out of love with you.” I was crushed. I have no idea if this could have been caused by him doing something with someone else and feeling guilty about it so he broke up with me or if he had found someone else but I am still deeply in love with him and dreams about him nightly. I want him back so bad. He broke up with me on June 22 and I haven’t actually spoken to him since. I sent him a happy birthday wish because I thought that would be a nice things to do since his birthday is the day before mine even though we weren’t together anymore and never got a response back from him. I don’t know if that was a smart decision but I really miss him and want him back. Since the breakup he has cut off all contact with me and I don’t know if that’s because he did something with someone else while he was gone and he feels guilty or if he found someone else. He deleted his Facebook or at least blocked me and I am so upset. He seems mad at me. I still think about him daily and all the fun times we had together. Do you think this article will help in my situation? I don’t know what to do. I miss him so much and want him back so bad. I’ve always heard that giving them their space is the best way to go about getting them back but that doesn’t seem to be working. HELP!
We met at a line dancing place last Sept. I liked him, so I was always trying to get his attention u know. One night we sort of talked and I taught him how to do a couple of dances, and then he came over to our table and met my friends. He and my sisters boyfriend are friends now. So we kind of slipped into liking each other and we would always dance together and sit together, and he would put his arm around me and hold my hand and stuff like that. And then on weekends our group would get together and have movie nights. So we were together for about two months and then I went with him to his family Christmas and met his mom and dad. But after that he started to withdraw a little and he would go talk to other people at dancing and would start ignoring me. Then after dancing he would stick around and talk and hug me and stuff. That made me mad that he would ignore me, and then after dancing want attention. So that kept happening, and he kept pulling further away, until finally he started dancing with another girl. In March I finally called him and told him to tell me what was happening. He said he didn’t know what he wanted, and that it’s not me it’s him. And when I asked him if he wanted to be done, he kept saying “I don’t know”.
There was this guy I really liked and he liked me so he asked me out. We were together and it was all going really good…..One day we got in our first fight and he broke up with me and I never knew why. I’m trying to get back together with him. There is this guy and he flirts with me from time to time in front of my ex and he turns red and gets jealous I guess, but he never talks to me..But he stares at me. I try to get in contact with him and everything but he shows no interest to talk to me…..I’m just confused

Lord I come to you with worry on my heart. I broke my boyfriend’s heart, and my have lost him forever. I just ask that you give him the gift of forgiveness. I ask that you open his heart and allow him to see that our relationship is worth saving. I ask that you be a force in our relationship and help us to fight through this terrible time and fix our relationship one day at a time. I don’t know where else to turn and I know that you work miracles. I am asking for a miracle at this point. Things look really bad right now but I know that all I need is faith the size of the mustard seed. I pray that you help me and my boyfriend get through this and I pray that my family stays together, I ask this in your name.
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