so Ive been with my boyfriend for almost a year, just a week before the anniversary he ended it. ive been trying to stop crying but i simply cant. specially the fact that many thing remind me of the good memories i had with him. he was the first real bf i had, and i was his first relationship. so having mistakes and some arguments were normal i think, so i neglected them. the good thing about him was that even after the times it was my mistake and he was hurt, we spent the night crying and apologizing and saying i was sorry, and the day after that he was totally normal. the longest time that we didnt talk was like 24 hours coz he had no reception in the mountains. the real question for me is that the usual relationship tips never worked on him. playing hard to get, staying out of touch or trying to make him jealous would just make him say: ” stop that… i know what you’re doing!” even in the beginning of or dating and after we knew each other well, i knew he was somehow different. you know he was like 50 shades, not the crazy kinky side of him of course but the part where he took care of me and protected me. despite his age, hes been working for long and its been almost two years that he provides for his family. he pays for the mortgage, buy food and all that. and he also goes to college in another city. he does not party like boys his age do and all the other boyish stuff. from the start, we both kinda knew that we cant last forever. i live in a country that family matters the most and in that part we were the opposite. but we are too young ( 22 ) for getting married or something like that, and i know that you might say im too young for being hopeless of finding someone else. the fact is, arranged marriages kinda rule in my family ( i live in middle east if u need to know) and its not just underestimating myself but im short ( 5 feet only ) my hair wont grow longer than my shoulder, my noes is too big in my face, and believe me, i have consulted with different doctors about my problems, but they need solutions or surgeries that my dad wont let me do. even my mom says im not beautiful. my sister mocks my face and body. let alone people in college and so on. im in a family that love and support does not exist, and coz im not that fun and outgoing because of my economic situation, i cant really go out with my girlfriend much. so im asking you this, coz Ive been asking myself: whats the harm? now that im alone i can understand how much the breaking up hurts, and i know that if it went on longer, it would have been even worse. but considering all those things i told you, isnt he the best for me right now? and considering the fact that he always acts different, and also kinda mannish despite of his age, how can i get him back? its our anniversary in a few days, and his birthday in 3 weeks. would that be okay if i contact him in those days?
We women tend to think that giving and giving to a man will bring him closer. And this includes doing things like checking up on him to see how he’s doing. It’s what I call “overfunctioning.” Don’t do it! A man is accustomed to valuing what he has to work for, so if you put in effort and make it easy for him, he will actually value you less. We work hard because we think that if we don’t he’ll assume we don’t care enough about him, and he’ll go away. But this is simply untrue. If you lean back and let go of the reigns, you give your boyfriend the chance to see what it feels like to be without you, and if he’s worth it you will get your boyfriend back. Remember this: men commit to you not because they want to be with a woman, but because they can’t stand to be WITHOUT you. Let him feel what it’s like NOT to have you in his life.
A week ago my boyfriend of 7 years told me that he wasn’t in love with me anymore. That he still cared and loved me but that he wasn’t happy and the spark was gone. He was my whole world, this has been the hardest thing I have ever done. The problem is that we have to still share an apartment together for another month until I can get my own. I have been trying to stay busy and thinking positive thoughts. But it’s hard when you still have to see him.
I broke up with my boyfriend about three weeks ago. He initiated it saying that things wasn’t the same, that he loved me but he felt like we were not happy together as we were before. We were together for 2 and a half years mostly in a long distance relationship but about three months ago I moved to his country to be closer and managed to be only a four hour drive away sop that we could see each other on weekends. It came as a huge surprise to me and I was (still am) a wreck about it… It is even harder now that I am in a big city on my own so it is hard to think about anything else. After that we texted for about a week because he wants to stay friend but it was very hard for me because it gave me the illusion that it was not really over and even though I tried to keep it light we couldn’t help but mention the breakup and how I was sad etc. After one last text where he said that for him his decision was made and he wasn’t going to change his mind, I was really hurt and asked him that we stop contacting each other for a while so that I can get better. The thing is that like many of you I suppose, I really want him back and I cannot help but think that this is the only thing in the world that I really want because I do love him. I know he is young (22) and that he probably feels like he wants to get more experience with other people but I cannot help but feel that we are right for each other… I haven’t harassed him or stalked him so I got that going for me… Now I am trying my best to not contact him for a while and work on myself to look better and feel better and hopefully see him again. I wanted to ask anyone for advice on this No Contact Rule, do you think it is efficient? Is there a chance we can be together again? Also since we live within a four hour drive distance it will be difficult for me to re-connect with him… I mean if he comes see me or I go see him we will have to sleep at each others places… Which is not that great to try to give it some space at first… Any advice for a broken heart is welcome! :)
Relationships often end in a whirlwind of doubt and bitter accusation. You probably said a few things you didn't mean, and she fought back. Now that you've had a little bit of time to think about what's been lost, you know you want her back. If you put your heart and mind to it, you might be able to win her over all over again. Fixing whatever went wrong in the first place can be all it takes to prove that you've changed.
So, follow the advice above, and then do this - do more of the above. Lots more. The common thread Gottman found that predicts divorce so well is weaved into it, and it is this: for a marriage to be stable, you must have lots more positive interactions than negative interactions. How much more? Twice as much? No. Three times as much? No. The positive has to outweigh the negative by at least five to one. This is not a number pulled out of a hat. It is a fact.
Over the years I’ve found that there’s several lesser-known methods which work very well for speeding up the process of getting an ex back. Which of these methods you as an individual should use, in your specific circumstances, will depend on your quiz results from my chances of getting your ex back quiz. Please go take that quiz right now. The methods you’ll need to use to solve your own specific breakup, will then be revealed!
It is natural to feel anxious and sad when this happens. Your anguish may lead you to attempt to use various manipulation tactics to get the upper hand in your relationship. But playing games to gain or regain the power in a relationship is bound to lead to its demise. There are many relationships in which one person holds more power than the other, but these tend to be extremely unhealthy. Physically or verbally abusive relationships, relationships in which one partner is cheating, and relationships in which one partner has more assets than the other (that are not common property) are often doomed to fail or to lead to heartbreak and unhappiness.
My girlfriend and I broke up a month and a half ago, we were talking frequently until 3 weeks ago when she moved to Portland, OR (we lived in California together). Last week she started dating another guy and I freaked out, text her (nothing mean) said “wow, that was fast” she got extremely pissed and blocked my number and Facebook. Do I still have a chance at getting her back? I made a lot of mistakes after the breakup, begging to come back to her, argued a couple times, freaked about her dating. I wrote her 2 letters but didn’t send either one yet. One is a love letter and the other is an apology letting her know I accept the breakup and wish her the best.
I’ m here writing about a boy again even though I ve promised myself I wouldn t. It s a boy from my village, always liked him but seemed so far away and the kind of chasing girls.Until 2 years ago he comes out of sudden where I was siting with my girlfriends and aks “accidentaly” who am i. Days after he reaches me at a cafe and asks if i’d like to meet him tonight. I was going through a difficult period and said to myself to say yes and give more chances without pushing situations and worry. i really thought it was a one time thing . turns out i really liked him and every now and then he texted me to meet. Eventually i invited him home since I was alone. After some days he came without telling me and rings my bell. he does come and check my house without telling me.Sometimes he opens up to me , talked me about his past,that he had a long relantionship that he can t get over. Also told me that with me it s not just sex but love. Even so when I leave from there he rarerly talks to me on fb or like my posts. Sometimes asks when I will come again, but lately he never talks to me or even say hi in public. Last time we met he was asking me things like if i had done something with someone else, if i have brought other guys at home, other time aked what was going on with some guy that was talking to me and things like that, but when i asked if he had done something with someone else he said yes and asked if it did matter. I didn t reply. He didnt talk to me or wished for my birthday.Now that i m here again for summer holidays he saw me my first week here when i was out saturday night and i returned home he showed up minutes after saying “i thought you would return this time”. It was really late,he stayed very little time And when he left said that we will talk again and “goodnight”. He hadhad to say goodnight since the first times we met. But a month passed and so sign of him. And to make matters worse, a girl we hang out with brought another girl here and immediately he talked to her,she gave him herfb,instagram in frond of me while i was trying to ignore him and he was talking to my friend next to me(?), he asked her go for an evening bath at the sea and next day he was out with them for coffee for hours,at the same cafe i was in. And im sure thethey were out together at night too… I m very devastated. He never sawed that kind of interest on me! Never invited me somewhere and he seems to talk to literally every girl but me! I don t know what to do! I m so frustrated i didn t sleep at all all night. I really havent talked to anyone about all this so i cant ask for any help or anything…please help me
Unfortunately, partners often go through mutual misunderstandings, because no one teaches us how to act in a relationship. What we see on TV and in movies, what we are told by many friends, about the behavior of men and women is most often very far from reality. So if you are blaming yourself, I am telling you to stop! It is possible that not everything in the demise of your relationship is your fault! If you would have known exactly what to do to keep your couple in a happy state, I’m sure you would have done everything that depended on you. Most likely you just didn’t have the right information. But everything can still be fixed...
“I was absolutely crushed when my boyfriend broke up with me seemingly out of the blue. Beyond devastated. I read so many articles on how to get your ex back but they all seemed so stupid. Then I found you guys. I read what you wrote about the no contact rule, and also questions to ask before getting back together with an ex and my mind was blown. I followed your advice to a T and when I was feeling really strong, I contacted him. We ended up meeting for a drink and he said I seemed different, more relaxed and comfortable with myself. We didn’t dive right back in, it was a slow process but it felt so different the second time. I didn’t feel so needy and terrified of losing him and everything just felt different. Anyway, we’ve been going strong for two years now and are looking for a place to move into together and I owe it all to you!”
Hlo ,on 27th June he broken up with me,we spnd lot of time together,he is my first love and everything for me,ours relationship was to good evn in school all teachers know about tht we are in relationship, all students said made for each other ,I think about him always every minute ,I was wanting a2nd chance to solve the problem but he decided to breakup evn he doesn’t give any reason why he want to break up with me,i had sent him lot of msgs to convenience him,bt I also force him to continue the relationship otherwise I do sucide and all ,I know there is my mistake and I’m feeling guilty about this ,I was do this only because I don’t want let him go bt after doing this he starts hating.now he don’t evn want to talk me ,it’s hard it’s realize that I will never be with this boy again ,he is the boy who does not want to make me cry bt now he hates me because of my reason bt later I apologise him and try to convince him and pleased him to talk evn as a frnd but he doesn’t so please please please give me some advice how I get him back because I don’t want to leave him in any condition
I need advice. We met on match.com and only dated about 3 weeks but had a great connection from the very beginning. Plus we share a lot in common (we agree about a lot, graduated high school same year, kids are same age). But he broke it off because 1) we moved too fast (didn’t have sex but went further than we intended by date 2) and 2) we’re in different places in our lives – I’m going through a divorce and he’s been divorced for years. I’m devastated. We ended things amicably last week (I didn’t fight it, though I wanted to) and we haven’t been in contact. But he’s been back on match.com already. My question is, what are our chances for trying again in the future? Did moving too fast derail us completely?
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