If your ex believes that you’re capable of attracting other women to the point that you could replace her, that will only INCREASE her perception of your mate value, and attract her back. Why? Because there is no greater sign of high mate value in the eyes of a woman, than a man’s perceived ability to attract OTHER women. And what is it that attracts women, even exes? Signs of high mate value.
More often than not if you have gotten this far in your conquest to get them back they are going to respond back positively. Except this time you are going to engage them in a conversation but make sure that you don’t go too fast. Remember, you still have to be the one to end the conversation first. Lets look at how a conversation like this might play out using an example from above:
My boyfriend and I broke up 4 days ago. We started having problems a few months ago and we just couldn’t fix them. It seemed like he just gave up on the relationship. We both still have feelings for each other, but we were both unhappy and stressed out. He started not texting me back, so I went psycho on him with my drunk texts and calls. That pushed him away and we broke up. He said right now isn’t the best time for our relationship and he does not want to put me first. Anyway, I really hope these steps work!
When those arguments become daily occurrences, and tend to arise over almost anything, then that’s when things get a bit more dicey. For example, if you arriving 5 minutes late for a dinner date turns into a massive screaming match and results in both of you going to bed angry for the third time in a week, then that’s a problem. These kinds of arguments, if they happen frequently and tend to blow small grievances or disagreements way out of proportion, can indicate that your marriage is headed in the wrong direction.
My ex bf and I live together. He said he will never change his mind. He says he is moving out. I have no proof. He hasn’t told his family we are broken up, for over a month now. He got on tinder immediately and is now off tinder. He is posting videos from a vacation of our from almost a year ago. I am living my life and going out trying to be social. How can I get him back?
Me and my ex broke up about 4 months ago. I was truly deeply in love with him and he said he loved me too. We lost our virginity to each other. This past summer I went on a vacation to Hawaii and he went on a vacation to Wisconsin. He left two days before I got back. We had been going out for 7 and a half months and we stared having sex at the 3 month mark. The first time we saw each other after we both got back from our trips, we hung out and I was planning on having sex with him that night, he acted like everything was fine when I went to pick him up by making out with me, picking me up and spinning me around. We went out though and he sat me down and said we needed to talk. Right then i knew something was wrong. He broke up with me with the phrase “I’ve fallen out of love with you.” I was crushed. I have no idea if this could have been caused by him doing something with someone else and feeling guilty about it so he broke up with me or if he had found someone else but I am still deeply in love with him and dreams about him nightly. I want him back so bad. He broke up with me on June 22 and I haven’t actually spoken to him since. I sent him a happy birthday wish because I thought that would be a nice things to do since his birthday is the day before mine even though we weren’t together anymore and never got a response back from him. I don’t know if that was a smart decision but I really miss him and want him back. Since the breakup he has cut off all contact with me and I don’t know if that’s because he did something with someone else while he was gone and he feels guilty or if he found someone else. He deleted his Facebook or at least blocked me and I am so upset. He seems mad at me. I still think about him daily and all the fun times we had together. Do you think this article will help in my situation? I don’t know what to do. I miss him so much and want him back so bad. I’ve always heard that giving them their space is the best way to go about getting them back but that doesn’t seem to be working. HELP!
But sometimes filling your life with positive things is not enough. In fact, having a good vibe isn’t really about having the things you love around you or trying to imprint the idea that you feel good into your mind. It’s more about removing the self-destructive, negative thinking (and the behavior that the negative thinking creates) – i.e. changing the lens that you see the world yourself and your situations through.
I broke up with my boyfriend about three weeks ago. He initiated it saying that things wasn’t the same, that he loved me but he felt like we were not happy together as we were before. We were together for 2 and a half years mostly in a long distance relationship but about three months ago I moved to his country to be closer and managed to be only a four hour drive away sop that we could see each other on weekends. It came as a huge surprise to me and I was (still am) a wreck about it… It is even harder now that I am in a big city on my own so it is hard to think about anything else. After that we texted for about a week because he wants to stay friend but it was very hard for me because it gave me the illusion that it was not really over and even though I tried to keep it light we couldn’t help but mention the breakup and how I was sad etc. After one last text where he said that for him his decision was made and he wasn’t going to change his mind, I was really hurt and asked him that we stop contacting each other for a while so that I can get better. The thing is that like many of you I suppose, I really want him back and I cannot help but think that this is the only thing in the world that I really want because I do love him. I know he is young (22) and that he probably feels like he wants to get more experience with other people but I cannot help but feel that we are right for each other… I haven’t harassed him or stalked him so I got that going for me… Now I am trying my best to not contact him for a while and work on myself to look better and feel better and hopefully see him again. I wanted to ask anyone for advice on this No Contact Rule, do you think it is efficient? Is there a chance we can be together again? Also since we live within a four hour drive distance it will be difficult for me to re-connect with him… I mean if he comes see me or I go see him we will have to sleep at each others places… Which is not that great to try to give it some space at first… Any advice for a broken heart is welcome! :)
Posting here for sanity. I was moving on and got to a good place and just like herpes he came back. Gave me the line that he has had a really bad week, he wants to talk to me. I ate up that breadcrumb up like my life depended on it. Back to checking up on him on FB, back to checking my email 36376799x a day. Now haven’t heard from him again, but he has time to like sexual garbage on FB and be on FB all.the.time. Pretty sure he is chatting up others, but why do I flipping care? how many more red flags do I need? Moving on….again.
i broke my ex coz i found out he was cheated on me..the other girl use my bikini..and i did not talk to him for a week and he ask sorry and want to be friends with me so i become friends with him he spent christmas and new years in my house..new years there is something happened me and him i thougth we are go back together but looks like he dont want to see me anymore..i invite him to go out with my friends party he did reject me so i tell him i will not bother him anymore we been together for 2yrs like live together..now he text me that he miss me a lot..and im still the best ever he had..but i dont know if he want to ggo back with me or not..im still love him but i think he dont love what will i do now …i miss him a lot too…but i have to move on with my life now i did not text him anymore or even hang out with our common friends…im still confused…
Dear God, I have hit rock bottom. I have nowhere to turn and nobody to rely on. You are my rock. You are the only way. I am here no on my knees… holding back the flood of tears. Give me wisdom to save my relationship with my boyfriend Willie.I want him back in my life. I love him lord. I don’t want Willie to go to another woman/girl. I really really want him back. Please Lord Strengthten our Relationship and strengthen our love lord. I know only you can save this. I beg up you. I plead with you. Show us a better way together. Please open his heart to my love and your forgiveness. Please touch his soul at this very moment. Where ever he is and what he is doing… touch him Lord. Help him see we need to save this love. Please, I ask and pray with all the strength that you are giving me just to be able to breathe. i am lost without him. Lord I need him. I need to feel your love with him. Dear Lord I pray. Please give me the right words, guide me to help save our relationship. Show me how strong I can be through you. My tears soak my spirit, my heart is breaking. I cannot hold on. I feel like every ounce of life is draining from me. Renew me. Renew me. Make him see. Use us as an example of how forgiveness and your love can save and change people. Help him rebuke satan and his temptations. I love him so dear Lord. I will honor you with my love for him. Give me this chance. Please reach out to him now and help him see we need to save this. I love you Lord. I will never doubt your ability. Please do this. Save us. Please. I beg u Lord..
Here is where he gets to see the beautiful woman you are in person. He gets to witness your positive vibe and new and improved look in the flesh. Like the reach out stage, there are no “rules” here. The light and fun vibe you brought to the conversations you’ve previously had should shine through just as bright. If your positive vibe is derived from genuine positive thoughts and emotions, interacting with him should be easy and effortless.
I dated a amazing guy for two years and we broke up 7 years ago. I quickly married the wrong person and have filed for divorce. For years I felt like I owed my ex an apology but I was never in the position to do so (my husband was the insane jealous type), so a month ago I finally worked up the courage to call. It was amazing! We talked for hours and dissected how our relationship was doomed to fail based on our attitudes, and how young and inexperienced we were. Every shitty thing that was done is now a joke that we can laugh at, and we began texting/calling regularly for two weeks. He is on a indefinite break from a long-term girlfriend and I am in the process of divorce, and it seemed like we both just needed to be able to talk to each other and be totally candid about our past and present.
Enjoy hobbies together. Though tastes may change, you should make time to do something you used to love doing together. If you used to love cooking Chinese food together, try it again. If you once trained for a half marathon but are now feeling too out of shape, commit to the challenge. By committing to something you enjoyed doing before, you'll rekindle some of the old passion you felt. However, it doesn't just have to be something you used to enjoy together. You can also try something new.
Listen, sure, finding some new dude may be okay for you as a bandade, but it won't help you get your ex-boyfriend back. You should make him jealous in a smarter way. Like, he should see that there are guys mingling around you, but don't let him see that you've actually found someone. Don't post stupid, drunken-party pictures on Facebook of you making out with some random dude.
You may worry about the old adage, “Out of sight, out of mind,” and use that as a justification to reach out. The thought of him moving on and forgetting about you is too terrifying to bear. One little text won’t hurt, you reason. But, in this instance, it will hurt. If you want your ex back, it is important that you strictly adhere to the no contact rule.
I understood so much more about where our feelings were coming from. I understood my wife much more and I felt more sympathy for her situation. I understood that I was driving her away with some of my actions and they were easy to correct. Bottom line: We are now much more patient and loving with each other. We are happier than we have ever been and our marriage is on track. Was it hard? Not really. It was more… like “ah-hah!” It took some effort, but honestly, with a bit of time and patience it was easier than I thought to turn things around.
This advice goes against every single natural inclination you have and it’s hard. You’ll want to answer the points she’s making and show her why she’s wrong. You’ll want to get a second chance or promise to fix your mistakes. You’ll keep pushing your points and think that since she’s not answering you right away; you’re getting through to her. You’re not. You’re just making her uncomfortable. All you’re doing is making yourself appear needy. She’s not going to forget this behavior down the line when you try to win her back.
It's important to not just talk, but to listen and hear what your partner has to say about what's going on in your relationship. You can show you're listening by summarizing what your partner has to say to show you've understood what he or she has said. You can also ask questions that show you've heard what the person has said and that you want to know more.